(Location: Noble Academy, West Courtyard — A.K.A. The Place Where Normalcy Goes to Die)
Let me preface this: I didn't ask for a fourth fiancée.
Not even one, really. But as fate, a drunken grandmother pact, and my System's deep sense of cosmic comedy would have it, here we are.
And by "here," I mean standing in the courtyard with a broken teacup in my hand, Seraphina looking mildly exasperated, Belladonna holding an unstable beaker, Aureline silently feeding her dragon, and a new figure appearing in the magical fog like the final boss of a dating sim gone rogue.
Enter Lady Virellia Morthshade.
### The Arrival (Or: Why Is the Ground Rumbling?)
The courtyard trembled. The air shimmered. Thunder cracked.
Inner Me: Someone turned the "ominous entrance" slider to max.
Virellia emerged, long coat flowing like a cape, boots that screamed "war crimes," and a magical greatsword casually slung across her back. She walked with the grace of someone who'd stabbed a few kings and didn't regret it.
Her eyes? Crimson.
Her aura? Literal death metal.
Her expression? Permanent disapproval.
A shadow beast the size of a small elephant trotted behind her. It sneezed. A raven exploded.
Me: "...Can I help you?"
She stopped a foot from me. Looked me over. Said absolutely nothing.
Then handed me a box wrapped in cursed runes.
"Peace offering," she said. Voice like a spellblade sliding from a scabbard.
I blinked. "Thanks?"
Belladonna leaned in. "It's probably full of teeth."
"Yours, eventually," Virellia replied.
### Huddle Time: All Four Fiancées & One Slightly Panicked Kael
The moment she stepped into the courtyard, the dynamic shifted. Seraphina crossed her arms tighter. Belladonna's grin widened into mad-scientist territory. Aureline quietly summoned a shadow bubble and smiled at it like it was a pet.
Inner Me: Is this what it feels like to be the protagonist of a magical hostage negotiation?
System Message:
> \[WARNING: Power levels in proximity have reached dangerous harem density. Emotional stability at risk. Recommend tactical retreat.]
Too late.
"You're the fourth," Seraphina said, tone polite but sharp.
"Obviously," Virellia said.
"Are you going to try and kill him too?" Belladonna asked.
"Only if he breathes incorrectly."
Aureline tilted her head. "He does that often."
"Okay!" I clapped my hands. "Let's not assassinate anyone before lunch, shall we?"
### Tea, Tension, and a Blade on the Table
We relocated to the school's tea hall. Well, we tried. The door exploded open from Virellia simply pushing it.
**Inner Me:** I think she's allergic to hinges.
She sat at the far end of the table. Sword resting on the surface. Everyone else gave it a solid two-foot radius. The shadow beast curled near her feet, occasionally blinking like it was judging me.
Seraphina sipped her tea with noble elegance. Belladonna dunked marshmallows into hers like they were enemies. Aureline let her tea levitate and swirl like a miniature storm.
"So," I began, because someone had to. "How exactly did we get betrothed again?"
Virellia didn't look up. "My father, Demon General Morthshade, entered a ceasefire treaty with your grandmother during the Treaty Ball. You were promised as collateral."
Inner Me: I was WHAT now?
"Collateral," Seraphina repeated slowly.
Belladonna laughed. "See, now that's romantic."
Aureline just sipped her tea. "Was there blood magic involved?"
Virellia shrugged. "Likely."
System Message:
> \[New Quest Unlocked: "Negotiate With Your Fourth Fiancée Without Losing a Limb"]
> Reward: Emotional scars +1
### Try Not to Die: A Game by Kael Reinhardt
"Look," I said, hands up. "I'm flattered. Really. You all bring something... *intensely terrifying* to the table. But can we talk about this like rational, magically overpowered teens?"
Belladonna slid a vial across the table. "Drink this. It makes people honest."
"I can be honest without--"
"It also makes your hair sing show tunes for an hour."
"Pass."
Virellia narrowed her eyes. "Are you planning to reject me?"
"I... don't think I have enough spine to reject any of you, honestly."
Inner Me: Why does that feel like a trap?
System Message:
> \[Achievement Unlocked: Harem Harmony Level 1]
> Buff Gained: +5 to Awkward Diplomacy
### Duel by Intentions (And Also Magical Lightshow)
Of course, because my life is a scripted comedy, Virellia stood up and declared: "I propose a duel. Not to the death. Just to first blood."
"Wait, wait! First blood?!"
"Emotionally," she clarified.
"Oh... carry on then."
What followed was an impromptu showdown of harem candidates, not in violence, but in pure intent.
Seraphina offered a letter of noble lineage and expectations.
Belladonna presented a potion labeled "LOVE OR SLEEP, TBD."
Aureline summoned a swirling mist that said "I have foreseen our union."
Virellia placed a dagger on the table and said, "My loyalty is absolute."
Me: "Okay, great. Love this terrifying support. Is there a pamphlet I can read on surviving this?"
Inner Me: Or a life insurance policy.
### Post-Duel Debrief: I Live (Barely)
We left the tea hall with minimal property damage. Virellia stayed beside me the whole time, walking like a shadow that decided to become sentient and deeply judgmental.
"You're stronger than you look," she said as we reached the dormitory.
"Thanks. I do one push-up a week. Sometimes two."
She didn't laugh. But she nodded. "Efficient."
System Ping:
> \[New Trait Unlocked: Shadow-Approved]
### Final Notes & Dagger-Sharp Promises
Before parting, she handed me the box she brought.
"Open it alone. Think carefully."
I did. Inside was a ring. Black steel. Cold to the touch.
Under it, a note:
> "When you accept, wear it. When you doubt, hide it. When you fear, send it back."
Inner Me: Okay. No pressure.
### Next Time on: "Yes, I Was Reborn..."
Kael decides to relax in a student bathhouse.
Naturally, it turns into an unsanctioned magical spa duel.
Belladonna brings enchanted bath bombs.
Seraphina refuses to leave her sword outside.
Aureline predicts a drowning.
Virellia just stares.
Kael's Message to Readers: Would you survive four fiancées with weapons, motives, and mystical pets? COMMENT BELOW or the shadow beast will sit on my bed again.
Inner Me: I miss the days when tea was just tea.