(Location: Noble Academy, Third Floor East Wing, That One Closet Everyone Avoids)
Let me make something clear: I entered that closet with noble intent.
Specifically, the intent to nap in peace.
But fate, as always, had other plans. The closet, in its creaky, dusty glory, turned out to be a convergence point for chaos. Not metaphorically. Literally. I found this out when I awoke to Belladonna sniffing potion vials next to my face.
Me (startled): "WHY are you here?"
Belladonna: "I needed dark storage for my anti-wilt elixirs. And you snore like a tea kettle."
Inner Me: I am both offended and intrigued.
### Minute 6 in the Closet: Seraphina Arrives
She opened the door and froze. Her eyes locked on Belladonna, then me, then back to the cramped chaos of the closet.
Seraphina: "Explain. Now."
Me (panicking): "Storage emergency."
Belladonna: "Closet date."
Inner Me: Please someone erase me from this timeline.
Seraphina walked in slowly, as if approaching a magical bomb. Which was fair. Belladonna was mixing something with steam.
Seraphina: "That smells like regret."
Belladonna: "Thank you!"
I tried to slide out between them but knocked over a mop, triggering a minor avalanche of cleaning supplies.
System Alert: Closet Stability: 4%
### Minute 12: Aureline Joins the Party
A gentle knock. Then the door opened with the kind of grace only Lady Aureline Dragova could manage.
Aureline: "Pardon me. I detected Kael's aura in distress."
Me: "My aura just wants five minutes alone."
She smiled calmly and stepped in, trailing shadows and scented oils. Her pet shadow-dragon, Velith, poked its head in before recoiling from Belladonna's fumes.
Aureline: "Cozy. Like the inside of a cursed tea kettle."
Inner Me: Why is that an accurate description?
System Update: You are now surrounded by three potential fiancées. Success chance of survival: 26%
I was running out of corner.
### Minute 15: Virellia Enters. Silence Ensues.
The door creaked again. Virellia Morthshade, tall and imposing, ducked into the closet with all the emotion of a battle statue.
She glanced around.
Virellia: "Situation?"
Me: "Unintentional harem convergence event."
She nodded once, closed the door behind her, and leaned against it like a guard.
Inner Me: Oh good. Now we're sealed inside with tension levels high enough to summon ancient spirits.
### Minute 20: The Existential Realization
Let me describe the scene:
* Belladonna was now testing perfume-scented paralysis potions.
* Seraphina was inspecting a cracked broom like it was evidence in a murder trial.
* Aureline had produced a tea set from her dimensional pouch and was brewing silently in a corner.
* Virellia had not moved. She watched me like I was a suspicious blade of grass.
And me? I was curled on a bucket, wondering if reincarnation had a customer complaint department.
System Update: You are now "Bonded by Proximity."
Effect: Increased harem synchronization. Side effect: Emotional overheating.
Inner Me: Does anyone sell emotional air conditioning?
### Minute 30: The Explosion of Feelings (and Possibly a Potion)
Belladonna: "So... who does Kael like the most?"
Me: "NO."
Seraphina: "Answer. Clearly."
Aureline: "I will accept a diplomatic ranking."
Virellia: "This should be settled by combat."
Inner Me: SYSTEM, ACTIVATE FAINTING MODE.
A vial exploded. Glitter everywhere. Some kind of emotion-enhancer. Everyone froze.
Belladonna: "Oops."
### Minute 35: Rescue Comes Too Late
The door burst open. Headmaster Arkwright appeared, wand at the ready, an owl on his shoulder.
Headmaster: "WHO authorized this unauthorized... closet summit?"
Me (covered in glitter, tea, and shame): "Technically? No one."
The owl hooted judgmentally.
Headmaster: "Reinhardt. Detention. All of you. Immediately."
System Alert: Quest Failed: "Nap in Peace"
Consequence: Magical community service.
Reward: None.
### Next Time on: "Yes, I Was Reborn...""
Kael is sent to help magical janitors clean up the Slime Wing.
Slimes multiply.
Kael multiplies his problems.
Kael's Message to Readers: Who do YOU think handled the closet chaos best? Comment below. Also, please invent a spell for privacy. I'm desperate.
Inner Me: I should've just slept under a tree.