They ran into the room, completely ignoring Arsenio's warnings, barging straight into the so-called Fun Room.
And what awaited them… they did not expect.
Before the trio lay a dim room bathed in sultry lighting. Velvet-red carpet stretched across the floor. Romantic harp music played softly in the background—badly, as if someone with arthritis was plucking the strings blindfolded.
The place was littered with furniture. Dozens of ornate chests were scattered around the room—and to their horror, some of them visibly shuddered when the group entered. A few even looked like they were vibrating.
"What the hell…" Finn muttered, narrowing his eyes at the twitching chests. "Are they alive…?"
Smack.
Majestria hit him on the head. "Put me down. This room is especially worthy of my feet. Just look at the carpet!"
Finn immediately shoved her legs off his shoulders.
"Not like—!"
She instinctively grabbed for his neck to steady herself, but her full weight only ended up dragging Finn down with her.
Majestria landed hard on her back, and Finn landed with his face directly between her heavenly soft funbags—his lower half nestled between her legs, spread wide like a goddess receiving worship.
The elf peered down from above, her pupils dilating, breath hitching, cheeks flushing.
"You two are insufferable…" the head groaned.
Finn let out a muffled groan—not of pain, but blissful peace. He had found paradise. He had come home.
Majestria's eyes widened as she realized exactly where he had landed.
"G-Get OFF of me!" she yelled, trying to sit up—only to press Finn deeper into her cleavage like she was burying a secret.
It was pure silk and skin—an angel's mattress, heavenly softness cradling his face from both sides.
Then she shoved his head violently to the side, slamming it into the floor with a dull thud.
Before she could chew him out, a loud, drawn-out moan echoed through the chamber.
Everyone's head snapped toward the sound.
There was nobody.
"Was… was that you, Finn?" the elf asked in the sweetest, most seductive tone she could possibly muster—voice dripping honey directly into Finn's weak little soul.
"W-What? No!" Finn stammered, his face turning pale.
"You sicko!" Majestria yelled, raising her hand to smack him.
SMACK.
"It wasn't him. It was the chest," the bearded head deadpanned.
Everything froze. Everyone turned toward the head—Majestria mid-slap, Finn mid-trauma, and the elf mid-fantasy. All wearing the same confused expression… except Finn, who looked horrified.
"STOP!" Arsenio burst into the room, panting, soaked in sweat like he just ran a marathon in wizard robes.
They all turned toward him—except Majestria, who finally shoved Finn off her chest with the grace of an angry landlord evicting a single mother. She stood, brushing herself off like nothing happened.
Finn, meanwhile, just stayed on the floor. Emotionally bankrupt.
"Stay away from the chest…" Arsenio wheezed, trying to breathe. "If you get too close, it'll—MY SPELLS, STAY AWAY!!"
Everyone followed his horrified gaze—
Majestria was already standing next to a chest, hands on her hips like a mom judging a suspicious blender.
"This weird thing moaned?" she said, her tone more disgusted than alarmed. She clearly hadn't noticed the boxes were twitching when they entered.
Her fist lit up with divine flame.
"Then I'll just destroy it!"
She swung hard.
Too hard.
Because the moment her punch came down, the chest flew open—and Majestria's strike hit only air as she stumbled forward right into it.
CHOMP!
The chest slammed shut on her torso, her upper half now stuck inside, legs kicking outside like she was a step-sister caught in a washing machine.
Her rear end was straight up. Wiggling.
Muffled screams echoed from inside the box.
And worse—the chest was moaning. Loudly. Disgustingly. Sensually.
It… it was grinding on her.
Finn's soul began leaving his body.
He wanted to feel aroused. He really did. But whatever the hell was happening now? This wasn't just cursed. This was cursed premium.
The elf gasped, her breath hitching sharply. Her cheeks flushed, her pupils dilated, and her glowing choker pulsed.
"Oh no," Finn muttered.
She sprinted forward like a fangirl at a BTS concert, arms outstretched toward a different chest—desperately trying to get grabbed.
But the chests kept dodging her. Sliding away like they wanted nothing to do with her sad desperation.
It was tragic. And weirdly athletic.
Arsenio stood frozen, his jaw hanging open, before snapping to Finn.
"What are you doing?! Aren't they your friends?! Help them!"
Finn glanced over lazily. "Friends? No, no—you've got it all wrong. Those are my kidnappers. These are the people who torment me. This? This is karma in real time."
He stood confidently, arms crossed.
Then he looked again.
Majestria's legs kicked harder, muffled yells fighting to escape past the moaning chest. The elf, meanwhile, was now dry-humping a box that refused to acknowledge her existence.
Finn sighed deeply.
He almost ran in.
But stopped.
Turned to Arsenio.
"Can't you help? Aren't you the Grand Wizard or whatever?"
Arsenio chuckled, scratching the back of his head.
"Hehe… I'm afraid this is one of those… hands-off situations."
Finn squinted at him. "'Grand Wizard' my ass."
Then Finn charged into the fray like a madman, yelling, "DAMMIT, MAJESTRIA!"
But the moment he bolted forward, the chests stirred. Wood creaked. Hinges groaned. Lids flung open.
Dozens of them started rattling violently, scooting across the carpet toward him like horny crabs in heat.
"OH HELL NO—GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!" Finn screamed.
Suddenly, the bearded head popped out of the box he was still holding, eyes wild.
"WHY THE HELL DID YOU BRING ME WITH YOU?!"
"I'M SORRY!" Finn cried as a chest lunged at his leg, mouth open wide like a wooden Venus flytrap.
One flopped right in front of him.
He leapt over it mid-sprint.
"DAMMIT!"
At last, he reached Majestria—who was still stuck, legs flailing, ass jiggling wildly, muffled screaming echoing from inside the moaning mimic.
It was like watching a goddess get turned into chest spaghetti.
Finn skidded to a stop behind her, panting. His brain short-circuited. Everything—the moans, the chests, the elf dry-humping a cabinet—it was all too much.
But his hands moved on instinct.
He grabbed her hips.
Pulled.
"Get her ass away from me, you idiot!" groaned the beard-head, still clutched against her rear.
Finn didn't even respond.
He just threw the box over his shoulder.
"YOU ASSHOLE!" the beard shrieked mid-air, before his box crashed into a sea of horny furniture.
Finn locked in.
He pressed his foot against the base of the chest, braced himself—and pulled.
His body pressed against Majestria's plush divine booty as he tugged with all his might. His neurons overloaded. His nose almost bled. His soul left his body and came back.
He gave one final yank—
POP!
Majestria came flying out, knocking Finn over as she landed on top of him.
She lay there trembling, chest heaving, tears in her eyes.
"My beautiful face… my body… I was defiled by a CHEST."
Finn blinked at the ceiling, completely dead inside.
Then they heard it.
Rattle.
RATTLE.
CRREEAAAKKK—
The swarm of chests were closing in.
Surrounding them.
Dozens of open mouths. Dozens of vibrating boxes. All ready to snuggle.
Finn clutched Majestria tighter, shielding her with his body like she was some kind of perverted princess.
"I WON'T LET YOU TAKE HER, DAMMIT!"