Today, my colleagues and I had a work event in Bogor. As usual, I rode with Rini, Tama, and Dimas in a GrabCar. This time, the vehicle was a silver Toyota Avanza. They always gave me the front seat—either because they knew I got car sick easily or because they preferred chatting freely in the back.
Rini and Tama were like a cat and a dog—bickering constantly, yet oddly inseparable in the middle row. Dimas, the calmest of us, always sat at the very back. As for our conversation during the ride? Office gossip, obviously. I tried to stay quiet—sometimes I succeeded, more often I didn't.
"I swear, Mr. Andre never shows up at meetings. So, guess who gets yelled at? Us. No wonder Ms. Dini's always mad," Tama grumbled.
"If he actually came to meetings, he wouldn't be Mr. Andre," Rini retorted with her signature sarcasm.
Those two worked in Monitoring and Evaluation, while Dimas and I were in the Research Division. Mr. Andre was their team lead, and Ms. Dini, a senior executive, oversaw both divisions.
"That man loves dropping tasks last minute, like deep-fried tofu off a truck. And I know he got those assignments a week ago from Ms. Dini. But he always dumps them on me a day before the deadline," Rini vented.
"Yeah, I hate last-minute stuff—especially when it's just human error," I chimed in, echoing Rini's frustration.
Being someone who thrives on structure and planning—except when it comes to love—I hated surprises like these. Turns out, life after college isn't built on discipline, well-organized plans, or accountability. What we really should've studied was how to stay calm with late people, how to fake smiles for bosses who ask for non-existent files, and how to tolerate general workplace chaos.
"They said today's guest speaker is special. We're supposed to learn a lot from him," Dimas shifted the mood to something more optimistic.
"Please. You never even pay attention during these sessions," Tama fired back.
"I'm just quoting Ms. Dini, man."
"Do we even know what the topic is? Policy Analysis, right?"
"No idea. Maybe someone from the Presidential Office?"
"As long as I'm not the note-taker again," I said with dread.
"Let the guys do it for once. Why do women always get stuck with minutes and paperwork?" Rini fumed, and I agreed.
"Right, but we're the ones lifting projectors and setting up cables," Tama replied.
"Those aren't official job duties. When it comes to real tasks, we're equals."
"Says who? What is that then—volunteering based on Pancasila values? Think you can work without a projector?"
"Patriarchal!"
"Matriarchal!"
I turned up the radio and gave a polite smile to the driver. Rather than listen to the endless debate in the backseat, I looked out the window. The trees swayed heavily—April rain season in full swing. Rain, or even drizzle, always reminded me of my first love: Arga Pangestu Jati. My feelings may have faded, but not the memories.
The drive went smoothly aside from a brief traffic jam near the exit. The hotel security greeted us with polite smiles as we headed straight to the reception to find our meeting room.
"Rin. Rin." Tama slung the LCD projector bag onto Rini's shoulder, making her stop abruptly.
"What the heck?" Rini shoved it back. "This is a guy's job!"
"Wow, now who's being sexist?" Tama grinned.
"Still going at it, huh? You two were top students back in college—maybe it's time to go back to preschool," Dimas quipped as he grabbed the projector and kept walking.
"My mom asked me the other day if there was anyone dateable at work. I mean, look at this chaos," Rini grumbled as she followed behind.
"Dimas is decent," I teased.
"He's taken."
"Oh really?"
"Your gossip radar is seriously broken. That skill is essential for survival in any office," she sighed.
I chuckled as Rini launched into a rant about my lack of intel. But my attention shifted as I spotted Ms. Dini already entering the meeting room. Our division head showing up before the event starts? That's a rare sight.
"She's early," I whispered.
"Must be that special speaker Dimas mentioned."
I shrugged, not really caring. If higher-ups wanted to play status games, that was their business.
We dropped off our bags in the room and headed to the hotel restaurant for lunch. Anaya's restaurant was minimalist, with six small, pretty tables—three lined along the windows, which were tall and wide, letting in generous light. I loved sitting by the window. When conversation tired me out, I could just stare outside.
The food wasn't abundant, but it was always well-composed—perfect for someone like me who loved Javanese cuisine. They even served fresh oranges, which was rare for hotel buffets. And I never skipped their soup options—always comforting.
"The noodle cart in front of the hotel is amazing, Nis. You didn't try it last time, right?" Rini asked, finishing her bihun stir-fry.
"Still full but already scheming," I smiled, shaking my head.
"You in?"
"Yeah, but tonight. Let's pray first, then head back. I just got a text—they're starting soon. Don't want to be late."
I showed her the message from Tias, our admin officer who usually handled attendance.
"Wait, I want dessert," Rini said, grinning like she hadn't just delayed everything.
I sighed. Rini, you're lucky your body defies the laws of calories.
Sure enough, by the time we returned, the session had already started—and yes, we were late. Not cool.
"What now?" she asked.
"We pray," I replied.
In moments like this, praying was less spiritual and more of a time crunch. We returned to the room with soft steps, heads slightly bowed, offering apologetic smiles to Tias, who gave us a look that could curdle milk. We slipped into the seats with Tama and Dimas.
"Where have you two been?" Tama asked.
"I'm still mad at you," Rini snapped instead.
"Wait—is that the guest speaker you were talking about?" she asked, eyes widening.
"I told you," Dimas replied.
Curious, I turned to look—and froze.
"Tio," I whispered.
"You know him?" Rini scooted closer.
I gave her a weird smile. I didn't know what to say.
"Introduce us later, okay? Let it be organic," Rini beamed.
I smiled again, awkwardly.
"I should thank your so-called 'one and only love,' Nis. Thanks to him, you almost missed out on this complete package."
He's not the full package you think he is.
"If I were you, I'd have fought for someone like him from the start. Good-looking, smart, and listen to his voice! So soothing, romantic, yet gentle and reassuring."
Rini was unexpectedly poetic. I could only respond with yet another fake smile.
"That smile again?" she huffed.
What else am I supposed to do, Rin?
Nis…
Rin. That "one and only love" you just mentioned messaged me. But you were wrong to call him that.
I am just the one without love, currently.
"On a business trip," I replied.
Did I reply? He didn't even ask anything.
Am I really the one without love?