The smell hit me before I even stepped into the living room.
Alcohol. Sweat. Cigarettes. Cheap perfume. There were bottles on every surface—empty beer cans, champagne flutes, someone's half-finished cocktail balanced dangerously on the edge of the piano. The carpet was littered with red Solo cups and crushed chips. A bra hung from the chandelier. Someone's thong was tangled around a door handle.
And—what in the actual hell—there was a lace bra on a tree outside.
"How did that even get up there?" I muttered, staring through the front window like the tree had personally offended me.
Liana appeared at my side, wearing the oversized hoodie she borrowed from me last night. Her curls were piled messily on her head, and she looked just as horrified.
"I think this house was possessed last night."
"That," I said, stepping carefully over a broken glass, "would explain everything."
Staff had already begun swarming in—vacuuming, mopping, gathering clothes with latex gloves like they were handling biohazard. One guy plucked a thong off the stair railing and held it out with tongs.
I was so glad it was Saturday. The idea of facing school on top of this chaos? No, thanks.
Liana and I joined the cleanup like we always did. Quiet, in the background, unnoticed. Well, mostly.
The living room couch was still occupied.
Ryan sprawled across one end, shirtless, with a blonde girl pressed up against him, snoring softly. His arm was draped over her waist like a habit.
Caleb was worse. He was shirtless too, his jeans half-unzipped, with two naked girls draped over him—one curled on his chest, the other tangled around his legs like an octopus.
Ethan lay on the longer couch with a girl asleep beside him, her lipstick smudged on his collarbone. He looked like a Calvin Klein ad gone rogue.
I rolled my eyes and kept sweeping. The place looked like a war zone. A very naked, alcohol-fueled war zone.
"Hey," Liana whispered. "Wanna mess with them?"
I paused, side-eyeing her. "Liana…"
Before I could stop her, she grabbed a feather duster and crept behind me. Then she jabbed it into my side.
"AHHH!" I shrieked, leaping like I'd been electrocuted.
I knocked over a bucket. A broom clattered to the floor.
The scream echoed through the room.
Ryan groaned first. "What the—?"
The blonde beside him stirred. "Mmm… babe?"
Caleb blinked awake next, squinting at the light. "Who's dying?"
The girls on him stretched, one of them completely topless. "What time is it?"
Ethan sat up fast, confused and irritated. "Why are you screaming?"
I pointed at Liana. "Ask her!"
She grinned, completely unrepentant.
The boys took in the mess—then the girls beside them—and looked equally disgusted and done.
"Alright, party's over," Ryan mumbled, nudging the blonde off. "Time to go, sweetheart."
"But—"
"No buts. Get your clothes and bounce."
Caleb rolled his neck. "Both of you, out. I've got a hangover the size of Jupiter."
Ethan didn't say anything, but he stood and reached for a shirt, not even sparing the girl next to him a second glance.
The girls grumbled, gathered their scattered clothes, and left in a messy parade of heels and perfume clouds.
Liana and I continued sweeping.
That's when Ryan looked over at her. "Hey, who's your little sidekick?"
Caleb smirked. "You bring a new maid, Mia?"
"She's my friend," I said, deadpan. "And she has a name."
"Liana," she added sweetly, doing a mock curtsy. "Nice to meet the royal jerks of this kingdom."
"Ooh, feisty," Ryan said, nudging Caleb.
Ethan just muttered, "Don't scare her off, idiots," and walked off toward the stairs.
Caleb winked at us. "We're going back to bed. Try not to miss us too much."
"Not likely," I said under my breath.
They laughed and vanished upstairs, leaving the living room in a disaster-state.
By noon, we were almost done. The house sparkled again, though the memory of what happened here clung to the air like smoke. Mia's mom stood in the hallway, pale and rubbing her temples.
"You alright?" I asked, walking over with a wet cloth.
"I feel like death," she whispered. "My back… my head…"
"Go lie down," I said quickly. "I'll finish. I'll even make breakfast for the boys."
She hesitated. "Are you sure?"
"Go. I've got this."
She gave me a tired, grateful smile and shuffled off.
"You're like a one-woman army," Liana said, handing me another trash bag.
"Well, I live with wolves."
I was in the kitchen frying eggs and bacon when they arrived.
One by one, the shirtless chaos kings entered—Caleb first, then Ryan, then Ethan. Hair messy, eyes half-closed, smelling like cologne and last night's mistakes.
Caleb dropped into a chair and yawned. "Smells good, House Mouse."
"Don't call me that."
Ryan leaned on the counter. "Still mad?"
"You called me a toy yesterday."
"Technically Caleb did," Ryan said, pointing. "I just stood there looking hot."
Ethan slid onto a stool and grabbed a coffee mug. "Do you even know how not to be annoying?"
"Nope," Ryan grinned.
I placed their plates in front of them. They ate like wolves—literally.
Then, mid-bite, Caleb grinned.
"So, Mia…"
Oh no.
"Who was the guy you were watching last night?" Ryan asked, mouth full. "You had that dreamy, pathetic look in your eyes."
Ethan raised an eyebrow. "Aaron, right?"
My heart nearly stopped. "What?"
"You whispered his name when you walked away," Ryan teased.
"I did not!"
"You did," Caleb said. "Aaron this, Aaron that. You got a little crush, Mouse?"
My face burned. "It's not like that!"
"He didn't even look at you," Ryan added, grinning.
"Gee, thanks for the reminder," I muttered.
Ethan smirked into his coffee. "Don't worry. He's not your type."
"And what is my type?" I shot back.
Caleb leaned forward, eyes glinting. "Guys who are dumb enough to flirt with you… and get chased off by us."
They all laughed.
I threw a napkin at them and turned back
to the stove, trying to hide my smile. Just a little.
Even if they were the worst… sometimes, they were the worst in the weirdest, most confusingly familiar way.