It's not new to me, the feeling of having someone you barely knew constantly hang around inside your head? I've always think of girls I like. And I say "I like them" because they always makes me think of them and somehow it feels like having butterflies in my stomach, and I would unknowingly smile at random times.
Trust me, If you feel the same thing, It means you like them. It's because you have a crush on them.
That was my thoughts as a 7 years old, so don't come at me.
I always have crushes around my neighborhood, we would play together from morning 'til afternoon; get whipped by our parents for staying under the sun the whole time; get an earful nagging for our dirty shirts and ripped pants; we had those sun-sweat smell all days of summer. It was fun until school comes along.
I don't like school that much, even as a child, I swear I was forced against my will. School is boring; it all has these rules that I don't understand; there is no fun! It was all boring following the same routine everyday, but...
"Who's that?" I asked to one of my friends beside me.
"Who? The new girl?"
"Yeah, she's new right?"
"I guess so, she was not in our class last year(Prep-Class)"
I can't forget about this one girl. She was a new addition in our boring class and she was weird. I knew she always steal glances at me, we always made eye contact. It seemed like she was somehow wary about me. She always has her eyebrows meeting together when I look at her; and whether I smile or not, her face don't change at all. Yes! Shes's weird.
"Bro, I literally like Callie the new girl"
"What!? Eww... She's not even a girl!"
"What do you mean she's not a girl?"
"Look at her! She carries her own chair like it's nothing! She always seems ready to fight! She even glares at me for no reason! She's a tomboy!!"
That's what I said to one of my close friends who confessed their feelings. Haha, It was my truth, from my eyes that was all truth; she's literally a tomboy and she hates me above all that!
One time, when we were having this school activity, we coincidentally paired up together. I tell ya, as soon as she knew I was her partner...
"Hey, Marie, change partners with me"
That's what she said. Damn Girl! I knew you don't like me but at least tell me the reason and just don't leave me hanging like an idiot (I was 7 and yes, I was, and still am an idiot).
After all that, she seems to avoid me, but strangely enough it's like fate was pulling our legs together, we would have all this coincidences and accidents together, but I mean why? Why would fate do that just to tease me?
And that's pretty much in my head for the entire school year. She was inside my mind, I was scared of her, Callie Jensen was my greatest fear in first grade. I would make every possible way not to get in her way; not even look at her way.
...
This is nuts! She's making my mental health decline. I must put this to a stop!
"Hey, Psst... Marie, Can you tell Callie that I would like to talk to her?" I said.
I can literally read what's in Marie's mind, I mean she gave me that look of 'What's he doing? he can literally ask Callie who's 2 feet away'. I can't, I actually can't look into her, no way.
I ran towards my friends and acted like nothing was about to happen, but in truth, I was shaking. I turn around to see if Callie agreed, and yes I saw her nodded and is heading my way.
For the first time, I looked at her for more than a minute, that's a world record I tell ya. She was walking towards me with her head held high; she was looking at me but strange enough her eyebrows did not meet at the center; her locks of curly hair was brushing off her shoulders as she lowered her head; she walked with no hesitation and it put me into a tight spot at that very moment.
What was I supposed to say again? Wait, what was I gonna do with her. That whole minute made it looked like a whole hour, I can feel my friends acting up as they see her coming towards us, I was shaking but I wasn't scared. Is this butterflies in my stomach?! No! Wait!! She needs to stop! Make her stop!! Please don't come!!!!
*Lub-Dub, Lub-Dub
"Oh, hey Jaxon! Marie said you wanted to talk to me" She said. Wait, she's not weird at all...
No, what should I say. Why do you hate me? Why are you avoiding me? Why do I always worry about you and me? Wait, scratch that, I don't worry it's just-
"I think I have a crush on you" I blurted out.
That was not what I meant, but, do I?
*Lub-Dub