After finishing dinner with my sister, we took separate baths, and settled in my room - if I can call it that, a room that once bore traces of Araragi's past. When I asked a blonde girl who appeared from the shadows about the killing stone, which had become my mission during my honeymoon, I received that cold reply.
"I don't know anything about it. Just donuts."
"Wow, that's interesting."
"I know about the nine-tailed cat. It's a masterpiece by Ellery Queen."
"After a dozen years, that little girl who only read manga has started reading classic mystery novels..."
Little girls grow up too.
Well, if she grew up, not only Japan, but the whole world would be in danger... It's easy to forget, but by staying in the form of a little girl like this, this monster is certified as harmless.
"Speaking of supernatural beings, you were once the king of supernatural beings, and you received elite training from Oshino, an expert. Even I've heard of the name Tamamo no Mae, you know?"
"Your name?"
It sounds like a fake name, but Shinobu tilts his head. He also tilts his wrists and ankles, which he thinks are stretching after being in the shadows for so long.
"My history as the king of supernatural beings, and my elite training from the good old Aloha Boy, it's been nearly eighteen years - six years, I guess - since then. I've completely forgotten."
I wanted to say that it was unreliable, but maybe that's just how it is - I don't have even a grain of sand left of the knowledge I crammed in when I was studying for the entrance exams.
It's nanoparticle-level forgetting.
I'm not even sure what I studied at university. To be honest, I'm not even sure if I even took the entrance exam... I guess I only got in because of my parents' connections, don't I?Though the events involving the supernatural, including the many times I've come close to death, seem to be deeply engraved in my memory, in reality those memories have probably been romanticized or changed.
I have memories of a hellish spring break, a nightmare Golden Week, fighting vampires and cats in a two-man cell with Hanekawa in a very stylish and elegant manner, and delivering some amazing catchphrases, but is this true?
"What if I tried that? A memory technique where you stick your hand into your brain and mess it up."
I remember it vividly. Like a trauma.
"Are you stupid? If I, a dregs of a man, were to try such a rude trick, the body of a murdered young girl would end up in your room."
"That would be terrible. I'd have to use all my power as a career police officer to cover it up."
"You're someone you should never become. Not a police officer, not an FBI agent."
"Ha. That's why I became a great detective."
"A line that sounds like something from a real mystery, right?"
I don't think so.
What is a real mystery again?
"I see. That was your technique from your time as a vampire... I guess you remember things even when you don't."
"That's right. If you mess around with your brain, you'll end up like Shimotsukere, a specialty of Tochigi Prefecture."
"Why are you so knowledgeable about Tochigi Prefecture specialties?"
"Well, I did live in this country for a time. As a god."
That's right. It's a setting that's easy to forget.
Rather than living there, it's more like reigning over it. So, could it be that this little girl was an eyewitness to the battle between Tochigi Prefecture and Gunma Prefecture at Senjougahara...or rather, the battle between gods, the battle between the giant centipede and the giant snake?
Was she watching from a sand-covered seat?
"The timing is off. It's been about four hundred years since I was in Japan - I mean, I was pretending to be a god in this land. That myth is a little longer than that."
"Well, probably."
More than a little, but that's human scale.
Was Tamamo-no-Mae from eight hundred years ago? It's on a completely different scale, the great monsters and gods...so there's no way that a shinobi and Tamamo-no-Mae had any kind of connection in this country in the past.
"So we're not as close as childhood friends like Oikura and I."
"That's right. You don't have any close childhood friends either."
"Yes, I do. Don't forget about Oikura."
"I denied the friendship part. Although, I can't deny my forgetfulness either. The time when I was pretending to kill monsters is now a distant memory... a fox monster."
"They seem to be as common as tanuki, but maybe not?"
They seem to appear often in ghost stories, but basically they have an image of being mischievous... When it comes to foxes on a scale that could destroy a country, to be honest, I have to say that we can't compete with them now.
In Japan and America, I'm at best an investigator.
That said, ninjas can't really be called battle personnel either... they're just entertainment, and it would be more accurate to call them mascot characters. If the rumors are true, even if there is an order from Koga, to whom he is loyal, he will have no choice but to flee as fast as he can... with his tail between his legs.
"I'll run away even if I have to cut off my tail bones."
"That's a strong determination, but it's a gruesome scene... I don't know anything about the Killing Stone, but come to think of it, I've heard rumors of a broken stone around there."
"I see. So there are similar legends after all. Did they branch off or merge? If it weren't for class, classics are interesting."
"Apparently the gyoza statue in front of Utsunomiya Station was also split in half. Maybe the sealed meat juice spilled out."
"That's a recent story, isn't it?"
So why do you know so much about Tochigi Prefecture?
Then you should know about Tamamo-no-Mae too.
You'll fall behind others.
"If you want ancient information, I'll grant your wish... but seriously, it's a good place to take a tsundere girl."
"Isn't it because of Senjougahara?"
"There's a tradition called the Akumata Festival. It's a strange festival where people parade around making nasty remarks, but it's perfect for a sharp-tongued person."
"I wish I could have told Hitagi about it when she was in high school..."
Now that she's grown up, entered society, and gotten a job, Hitagi's sharp tongue has completely disappeared... and she can't be a sharp-tongued reporter for an information program anymore. But even so, it's a festival that's so impactful that I'd like to stop by if I could, just to reminisce about the past.
"Where is it?"
"Ashiashika City."
"You're not pulling out ancient wisdom from your head, are you just reading a guidebook?"
You're looking forward to your honeymoon more than I am, I suppose?
It may be understandable. If you think about it, this little girl is always tied to my shadow and has no freedom of movement. She used to be a traveling princess who traveled all over the world.
"I honestly don't remember my days as a princess when I couldn't stay in one place. Being forced to travel is traumatic. But you took me to America for over a year, and it's true that I miss Japanese food."
"You're originally from Europe, aren't you?"
"I hear people's tastes differ when it comes to Shimotsukere, but I'm interested in something called Nasuben."
"Nasuben?"
As the hope of the Rumors Department, I summoned Shinobu to do some preliminary research on the supernatural, so it's a mystery why I'm only listening to lectures about Tochigi Prefecture, but I can't help it if I'm curious.
The foundation, the base, is our honeymoon.
I want to make the trip as good as possible to make up for taking the name from my loved one. "Well, speaking of Nasuben, the nine-tailed fox is not entirely unrelated. It's an abbreviation of 'Nasu no Makunouchi Bento'. Although it's called a bento, it's more like a set meal, but it's customarily served on nine plates to represent the nine-tailed fox."
"Hmm... I'm uneducated, so I just didn't know about the nine-tailed fox, but it's firmly rooted in the local culture... and what about the fox dance?"
"That's in Hokkaido, isn't it?"
That's right.
Unlike Shinobu, I've become completely ignorant of Japanese affairs... but that doesn't mean I've become knowledgeable about Washington. The only thing I've seen is that obelisk.
There's a sense of instability that's losing its roots.
Still, this isn't instability enough to lose its name, I guess.
...But let's talk about that.
It's an unavoidable topic on our honeymoon to Senjougahara. "Shinobi"
"What is it?"
"Well, I don't know if I should call you Shinobi... I did steal your name, didn't I? I wanted to take this opportunity to really dig into that matter."
"You've been glossing over this with such nonsense, but now that you've dug into it, I don't know... No, I vaguely heard you talking about that with the tsundere girl."
"Now that I've grown up, I think I should face the truth I've been avoiding with a new sense of ethics. First of all, about the time I rescued you when you were dying after having your limbs torn off..."
"That's enough to finish this book, you know?"
Shinobi ended the conversation with a meta-commentary - as expected of a 600-year-old. He was trying to deal with my serious talk by turning it into a joke. "Well, I'll cut it off and move on, but... I think that neutralizing you may have been necessary. But while taking away your powers was necessary, I think taking away your name may have been too much."
"Hmm. But in supernatural terms, taking a name and taking away powers are practically the same thing - if we go back to the truth, the name Kiss-Shot Acerola-Orion Heart-Under-Blade was given to me for that purpose."
"Ahh - from Death."
"Don't you dare say Death."
Dystopia Virtuoso Suicide Master... the progenitor who turned the wandering princess Shinobu into a vampire.
He's deceased.
During my university days, Shinobu and I visited Europe almost as if we were stowaways, in order to see the progenitor before he died - I should mention that this happened before I became a police officer.
"Oh, come to think of it, that's why I was called that. What was I before that? A wandering princess... when I was an aristocratic princess."
"Princess Acerola."
"Princess Acerola."
"Don't laugh at my old name."
"I'm not laughing."
"Before that, I was Lola. Lola."
"You're trying to make me laugh, aren't you? The way you say it."
"Road Roller."
"It's impossible to escape."
You're trying to make me out to be an unscrupulous person. What a wicked little girl... definitely not Lola.
"But that's a difficult question, isn't it? Did she become an evil little girl because she was no longer Lola, or was the name Lola unsuitable because she was an evil little girl? Which came first, the chicken or the egg?"
"The way you put it, the chicken definitely came first. I became an evil little girl because you sucked my blood. Don't blame it on the name."
Of course.
To be precise, I sucked as much blood as I could--until I was no longer Kiss-Shot Acerola-Orion Heart-Under-Blade.
It's not that I want to avoid responsibility.
Rather, I want to take responsibility.
"The name Oshino Shinobu already has an image of a blonde little girl firmly established in her mind."
"I'm sure that's not what you intended when you named Aloha. It's damaging to both Oshino and Shinobu's reputation..."
"You call Oshino Aloha and Hitagi a tsundere girl, and don't call them by their names, is that because you don't acknowledge their individuality?"
"You're trying to make me into a character that violates compliance, as if that was a given from before. You yourself called Aloha a dirty old man and an Aloha guy, didn't you? Calling him Aloha is disrespectful to the Aloha spirit."
"You're giving him nicknames of your own volition.
"Maybe things like calling people by the wrong name all the time are out of fashion now. That used to be the standard for a great detective character." "On the other hand, when the vampire hunters were calling you a member of the Heart-Under-Blade clan, weren't you also a member of the Heart-Under-Blade clan?" That's true. I can't imagine that I'm the same person when Senjougahara Hitagi calls me Araragi-kun and when Araragi Hitagi calls me Koyomi - and there's no way that I'm the same person when Kanbaru calls me Araragi-senpai and when Oikura calls me Araragi without using his first name. Just as there is no single truth, I am also not the same... there is as much diversity as there are people who call me that. Young Araragi and Detective Araragi, and big brother Koyomi and Detective Araragi are similar but not the same. "Looking at it this way, what you're called is more important than you thought. A name is just a symbol and you can't just write it off."
I made him discard that.
Me, to Hitagi. And to Shinobu too.
"I guess you have no choice but to run for office after all. You'll soon be eligible to run for office."
"It was a threat that someone like you even had the right to vote, and now you're trying to get that right as well..."
"I'm sure you were extremely determined when you became a vampire 600 years ago, but how did you feel when Death named you that?"
"So don't call me Death. I don't remember exactly, but I'm sure I didn't feel too bad about it. It was a cool name."
I made him discard that cool name. On the other hand, whether it's Kiss-Shot Acerola-Orion Heart-Under-Blade or Shinobu Oshino, as long as the person is happy with it, I can say that there's no problem.
"I feel that selfish sympathy is an affront to the laws of nature."
"Laws are not the laws of nature, though. As for that tsundere girl, I feel pity for her, being named after a criminal."
"Who's the criminal?"
"But maybe that's what it means to be related. To bear half the sin and half the name."
That is exactly the relationship between you and me──In that sense, it's unreasonable to keep Shinobu bound to the Oshino name forever. The name of the producer isn't listed.
If I'm going to bind her,
I should bind her with my name.
"What's with that weird look you're giving me? It's been a while."
"Don't act like I used to look at you weird. No no, I just thought that I should take you to Oshino Hakkai soon."
"Don't take the heroine all over Japan, you're such a troublemaker. Are you planning to become a travel mystery hero?"
"Well, I don't know where Oshino Hakkai is."
"In Yamanashi Prefecture."
"You really know more about every corner of Japan than I do... are there any seas in Yamanashi Prefecture? Not seven seas, eight seas."
"To be honest, it's not a sea."
"It's not a sea. "It's a spring. The woodcutter probably dropped his axe at Oshino Hakkai. With eight, it's bound to fall at one of them." "That was supposed to be a foreign fairy tale... but maybe optional separate surnames for married couples is like choosing between a gold axe and a silver axe. The real name remains submerged in the spring." "Oshino Hakkai is nice, but I'd like to see Nene Kirimaru, which is said to be at Chugu Shrine in Futarasan Shrine, first. I'd like to compare which is longer, the one at Chugu Shrine." One after another, plans are being added from outside to our honeymoon... Nene Kirimaru? I've only heard the name before... but there's a strong pull towards a battle. It's no longer the era where everything is resolved by battle or violence... Chugu Shrine? I remember hearing about Futarasan Shrine from Hanekawa, but is it different from that? "The location is different. Futarasan Shrine is a World Heritage Site along with Nikko Toshogu Shrine, and Chugushi Shrine is right next to Lake Chuzenji. Well, I haven't been there either, so I can't say for sure... but why don't I go and scout the location for you? Jump in." "I can't let you check out the honeymoon, it would be ruined if you did. No spoilers allowed. Well, if it's near Lake Chuzenji, it should be on the way to Senjogahara, so it should be easy to stop by... Wasn't the insult festival you mentioned earlier in Ashikaga?" "Yes. It's the land that gave birth to the Shogun family." "Ashikaga and Tochigi, too... I wish the Muromachi Shogunate had opened there. So, as for the location of Ashikaga City..." I looked it up on my smartphone, and it was far from both the Nasu Highlands, where the Killing Stone is, and Oku-Nikko, where Senjogahara is. You could say it's on the other side of Utsunomiya. Since I can't leave those two out, I guess I'll just have to give up on the Insult-talking Festival this time... It was very interesting in the sense of exploring Hitagi's roots, but this strange festival isn't held all year round, given the time of year.
I can't really plan my schedule around the Insult-talking Festival.
"We've adjusted our schedule so we can't cover the whole of Tochigi prefecture. But Shinobu, is there anywhere else you want to go? If it's on the course, let's prioritize it."
"Speaking of places to go, maybe a mountain pass. Isn't Irohazaka also in Tochigi?"
"Irohazaka"
"It's a slope that leads to Lake Chuzenji, with 48 hairpin bends. To be precise, it's an uphill slope on the way there and a downhill slope on the way back. Each curve is assigned to one of the 50 sounds... apparently."
"48 curves is amazing, but the numbers don't add up whether it's the 47 sounds of the Iroha song or the 50 sounds of the Japanese alphabet...?"
Shall I search the internet for that mystery as well? No, that's the kind of knowledge you should gain by experiencing it in person, without any location scouting or knowledge. If it's a slope that leads to Lake Chuzenji, then surely that's the road to Senjougahara.
"Senjougahara is going to provide the car. It's not a bride's car, and it's not a camper, but it's a large minivan."
Large minivan is an oxymoron, but that's the only way to describe the size of the car... Apparently he'd bought a few different cars before settling on this one.
My Volkswagen couldn't be maintained when I went on training abroad, so I sold it. I'm sure it's being well-used somewhere right now.
The car you're driving could have been my Volkswagen? "I'll make sure to have a child seat set up, so don't worry."
"Who can feel at ease hearing that...? Wait a second, you."
"What's wrong? Is something abnormal happening?"
"Because we're one and the same, it's inevitable that I'll be accompanying you on your honeymoon... but aren't you trying to make me sit in a child seat in front of the tsundere girl and the monkey girl?"
"Well, a child seat may be embarrassing, but road safety takes priority over everything else. I'm in a complicated position, working for the Rumors Division and the FBI, but in the end, But in a society based on the automobile industry, the Traffic Department is the strongest."
"You're the one who embarrassed me by making me sit in a child seat, but that's not the issue... Monkey Girl is fine."
"It's not the time to call humans monkeys these days, is it? But, Nikko means monkeys, right? You could even say that monkeys are better than humans because they can reflect on their actions."
"Don't assume you see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil. I had a bit of a quarrel with Monkey Girl. I remember we had a rap battle, where we clashed our souls."
"My memories are warped."
It was when the dead and the dead were involved.
I won't go into the details, but when I think about what happened at the time, I'm not sure if our relationship can be dismissed with "it's fine"... I mean, Kanbara and I have had some bloody battles before.
"That's right. Killing each other was an everyday occurrence for us."
"You're talking like gods."
"No, you. What I want to discuss is the tsundere girl."
"What is it?"
"I've never met her."
Strictly speaking, she has.
Before Shinobu was sealed away by my shadow, in the ruins of the old cram school, when she was receiving elite education from Oshino──Senjougahara Hitagi witnessed a young girl sitting with her helmet pulled down low in the corner of the classroom.
But that's all.
I can't say that I met her, and even if I could, I never exchanged a word with her──Senjougahara Hitagi had almost no contact with the King of Monsters or the remains of a vampire.
You could even say that I have been exceptional, and even proactively placed Hitagi in an exceptional position - I have kept her as far away from supernatural phenomena as possible since she was freed from the crab.
In that sense, Senjougahara Hitagi was treated specially, unlike Hachikuji, who later became a god, Kanbaru, Gaen's niece who continued to harbor the monkey's left hand, and Sensengoku Goku, who also later became a god, or Hanekawa, who was more monster-like than supernatural.
However,
When it comes to Araragi Hitagi, the same is not true.
"Right now we're separated by the ocean, but in the not-too-distant future, Hitagi and I will be living under the same roof. I'd have no choice but to introduce you when that time comes. So this honeymoon is a great start." "...I was planning to follow you hiding in the shadows. No, I could even move into your sister's shadow like the other day and stay here and watch the house." He began to mutter something shy.
The former King of the Monsters, who was arrogant towards everyone, is so shy now──the crime of stealing a name is a heavy one after all.
To turn the King into such a coward. "I want to introduce my proud partner to my new partner." "Wouldn't Senjougahara become the real Senjougahara?" "That was a misnomer. I want to introduce my partner to my wife." Is "wife" still an okay word to use in the Reiwa era? Unfortunately, there is little information available, so I am not yet able to determine the Japanese standards... but regardless of whether it is politically correct, it does seem to have a long history.
Of course, setting aside whether Senjougahara will become the real Senjougahara, if handled incorrectly, this is an encounter that could turn Araragi Hitagi back into Senjougahara Hitagi, but even so, this is one thing I cannot overlook.
When I was in high school, I hid Shinobu's existence from my younger sisters, Karen and Tsukihi, and from my parents, who were still at home (the same goes for the existence of Ononoki-chan, who lived with us for a while), but it's a different story when it comes to my wife.
I had originally promised Hitagi.
When we started dating.
I had to keep secrets regarding the supernatural phenomena - so it was actually far too late to introduce Shinobu.
I can't help but be surprised that such a plot twist had not been resolved for nearly 18 years.
"We've entered an age where we get in trouble if we don't resolve the plot twists. I can't believe it. Foreshadowing is beautiful when it's laid out like a spider's web, and whether it's resolved or not is secondary, isn't it?"
"I understand what you're saying, but when you say it, it's a big problem. Well, there are plenty of other twists, aren't there? Foreshadowing that hasn't been resolved. Why are you trying to arrange a marriage between me and the tsundere girl now? Wouldn't it have been beautiful to keep them separate?"
"With Senjougahara Hitagi becoming Araragi Hitagi, it's finally time to change the name of the tsundere girl."
"Why?"
Personally, I'd like to see the monkey girl and the other characters changed as well, but in order, the tsundere girl comes first--because.
"Because you will become a daughter. Araragi Hitagi will become a mother."
"What?"
"What? No, a mother. The plan is to adopt you."
Oshino