"Did she drink herself to death?"
"Looks like she died peacefully."
"She's still breathing!" After Marisa checked Reimu's pulse, everyone let out a sigh of relief.
Once confirming she was just blackout drunk, Rin patted Reimu's cheek and called out—
"Hey, Reimu! Can you hear me?! Wake up! Don't actually die on us!"
"Think about your shrine with almost no visitors! Your donation box that's always empty! That cheap tea you stretch for half a month with just 500 yen!"
"A bright future is waiting for you—don't you dare pass out now!"
"Damn, Boss, isn't your wake-up method a little too cruel...?" Marisa and the others gave Rin weird looks.
If they were Reimu, they'd probably prefer staying dead.
But it worked.
Reimu's unfocused eyes fluttered open, though the alcohol's hallucinogenic effects meant she didn't see anyone around her.
Every time Rin patted her cheek, she felt like stacks of cash were slapping her face—making her twitch in pleasure.
"M-More... hehe... I can take it..."
"..." Rin paused. The group stared at the giggling shrine maiden in silence.
Does this liquor unlock hidden fetishes or something?!
"Marisa, there's some sober-up soup in the kitchen. Go heat it up for her."
"Got it~"
"You two—stop shaking the bottle. It's empty."
Yuugi, who had been desperately tilting the liquor bottle for even a single drop, reluctantly handed it to Suika. But Suika immediately started shaking it too, mouth wide open.
Just one drop... ONE DROP!!
Rin glared at the two embarrassing oni before turning back to Reimu.
The shrine maiden was now sprawled on the floor like a starfish, mumbling incoherently—
"I'm dying here today. Nobody moves me! Why'd you stop...? HARDER!"
"Boss, are you sure there's nothing weird in this liquor?" Sakuya asked skeptically.
How did a proper shrine maiden turn into this?
"Nothing. It just causes hallucinations. She's probably seeing something else." Rin looked innocent.
Reimu was definitely imagining money raining down on her.
He was curious what Marisa would hallucinate, though.
"Soup's here! Smells good."
Marisa returned with the sober-up soup.
As Rin carefully fed some to Reimu, her delirious mumbling quieted slightly.
Her eyes finally focused—somewhat—as she stared at Rin.
"Boss...?"
"You're done with Marisa already? That was fast..."
"Ah~ Is Yukari's next, huh? You'd even go for that old hag?! OW OW OW—MY HEAD! MY HEAD'S SPLITTING!"
"MOM, STOP PINCHING! I REALLY DON'T HAVE SECRET SAVINGS!! AHH—FIFTY! JUST FIFTY YEN!"
"THOSE PAPER BILLS ARE FAKE! STOP LOOKING—!"
A delicate hand reached out from a gap in space, clamping onto Reimu's skull like a vice.
Rin watched, speechless, as Reimu—still not sober—continued babbling nonsense.
Before he could force the rest of the soup down her throat, Reimu suddenly flailed her arms.
"Marisa, you're so weak! How can you let this sadistic boss bully you every day?!"
"Get up! I'll pay you 500 yen—YOU ride him and wreck him! Grab him! Twist him... like this!"
Reimu mimed twisting something in the air, sending a chill down Rin's spine.
Marisa's face darkened. 'Just what the hell are you hallucinating?!'
"Pathetic. Yukari's just as bad. Move! I'll show you the Hakurei family's secret riding technique!"
Before anyone could stop her, Reimu shot up like a zombie and started violently tearing at Rin's clothes.
The group panicked, immediately dragging her away.
But Reimu kept shouting—
"Why so many people all of a sudden?!"
"A party?! I'LL GO FIRST!"
"Wait, was someone not invited...?"
"SOMEONE SHUT HER UP!!" Sakuya froze time, shoved a cake into Reimu's mouth, and—
Silence.
As everyone disappeared down the hallway, Suika and Yuugi exchanged glances, no longer daring to shake the empty bottle.
Boss, are you sure this isn't just aphrodisiacs disguised as liquor?
Under their judging stares, Rin raised his hands.
"Don't get the wrong idea. There's nothing weird in it."
"It just causes hallucinations and amplifies emotions. If the drinker's mind is corrupt, this happens. A proper person would handle it much better."
...Is there even a single proper person in this shop?
Suika's lips twitched. Before she could speak, Yuugi stepped forward—
"Boss, I'm a proper person. Let me try."
"Even if something happens, I'll take responsibility! You don't have to worry!"
"..."
'Your ulterior motives are hitting me in the face.' Rin sighed.
"No more. This liquor's super rare—only one small bottle a week. Even I have to wait till next week for another sip."
"Tch—"
The two oni clicked their tongues in unison, glaring resentfully in the direction Reimu had been taken.
But then—
Remilia suddenly flew over, dragging a half-dead Patchouli behind her.
"BOSS! PATCHOULI POISONED HERSELF! Look at her arms—weird marks, like she's cursed!"
"..." Rin's eye twitched at the crooked magic circles scrawled on Patchouli's arms.
Will this shop ever know peace...?