Gu Sanqiu moved swiftly. While his speed couldn't compare to Xiao's teleportation-like ability that spanned vast distances, at this pace, he could still make it to Mondstadt in time for the nightlife.
Hmm, but wouldn't that mean he'd have to foot the bill for a certain slacker's drinks?
Oh well, not a big deal.
"Where are you going?"
A flash of green light, and Xiao appeared beside Gu Sanqiu.
"The leylines have been unusually active lately. You'd best not wander about carelessly."
"Xiao-ge, I'm heading to Mondstadt for an appointment."
Gu Sanqiu greeted him with a casual wave. "What exactly do you mean by 'unusually active'?"
"Some demonic entities have absorbed the energy fluctuations of the leylines and awakened earlier than expected. But I can handle them."
"Heh, sounds like the prelude to something big."
Gu Sanqiu clasped his hands together in mock gratitude and chuckled. "Thanks for your hard work, Xiao-ge. After all this settles down, should I arrange for Liyue to award you with a medal or maybe a fancy banner?"
"No need. Just be careful yourself."
With that, Xiao vanished.
Far away in Liyue Harbor, Zhongli, who had just returned to Wangsheng Funeral Parlor after listening to a storytelling session, raised his teacup, then set it down again.
Raised it, then set it down again.
Forget it. Let him be. A daughter might be a different matter, but if a son wants to explore the world, so be it.
Zhongli relaxed and sipped his tea. Moments earlier, he had been tempted to pull Gu Sanqiu into his domain to force him back to Liyue Harbor where he could stay out of trouble.
And as for falling from the sky after being yanked into the domain?
No problem. There's no way that brat's body defenses would actually break from the impact.
"Well, if he wants to explore, let him."
Zhongli set the cup down. "Barbatos, you meddlesome, trouble-loving drunkard. Are you truly confident about letting them meet so soon?"
---
"Yo~, over here, kid!"
As soon as Gu Sanqiu landed in an unoccupied spot, he saw a figure with a tilted hat waving at him.
"When I was flying just now, I was inexplicably hit by three small, targeted storms. As the Anemo Archon, care to explain what's going on?"
Gu Sanqiu glared at Barbatos, his expression sour. "And if your explanation isn't convincing, you're paying your own tab tonight."
"Eh, how could you think that? Do I look like someone who would prank juniors for fun?"
Barbatos straightened his face and declared solemnly, "Besides, I'd feel bad if I kept letting you pay for me. As the Anemo Archon, I'm a man of reputation. What do you take me for?"
…
Sure. Tell me another joke. Mondstadt's beloved God of Freedom feeling ashamed? That's like saying the Heavenly Principles are my wife.
Expressionless, Gu Sanqiu shoved his hands into his pockets and silently observed Barbatos.
Go ahead. Keep acting.
Flustered, Barbatos retorted, "Seriously, stop looking at me like that! If you don't believe me, I'll have your old man come beat you up!"
"You sound just like a kid who calls for their parents when they can't win a fight."
Barbatos adjusted his hat and rolled up his sleeves.
"Forget your old man. I'll deal with you myself and show you the dignity of an elder."
Calmly, Gu Sanqiu pulled out a jar emitting a rich fragrance.
Item: Thousand Suns Soulcalming Wine
Quality: Purple
Origin: Crimson Flame World
Notes: A fiery taste combined with a serene soul-cleansing aroma. Its unparalleled flavor delivers an experience of bliss, making it a highly sought-after limited-edition product in the Crimson Flame World.
Finally, his useless golden finger skill did something right. Or rather, it did something fitting its "foresee the future" function.
He'd drawn two jars of this wine in one go. One was handed to Xiao during an earlier encounter, and the other was kept specifically to deal with the drunkard poet.
For someone like Barbatos—whose main profession was bard, side job was drunkard, and occasional occupation was ruling a nation—this wine was irresistible.
"Heh-heh, my dear nephew. My good nephew."
Barbatos snatched the jar and tucked it away, then grabbed Gu Sanqiu by the arm, dragging him toward Mondstadt City.
"Come, come! I'm in a great mood today. Drinks are on me at Angel's Share!"
…
Gu Sanqiu raised an eyebrow. "On you, as in I pay?"
"Hey now, don't underestimate your elders!"
Barbatos smugly pulled out a sparkling gem from his pouch, then switched to a fragment of elemental crystal.
"See? Proof that this Archon isn't broke."
Gu Sanqiu took the gem from Barbatos' pouch, held it to his nose, and sniffed.
"It smells like dirt. And decay. Did you go grave robbing?"
"...Doesn't Liyue have a department called the Ministry of Civil Affairs? They're missing out by not hiring you as a special consultant. Where do you learn all these strange skills?"
Barbatos sighed and gave an awkward laugh. Gu Sanqiu felt a chill run down his spine—this guy was definitely hiding something big.
"Well, it's nothing major. I just asked Dvalin to accompany me to a few places. If I recall, they were old sites used to worship me—or, uh, Dvalin."
"So no grave robbing. I was merely reclaiming my salary."
Gu Sanqiu looked up at the sky in silence.
A gentle breeze rustled by, shifting the clouds across the blue expanse. He could almost hear Dvalin's anguished roar in his imagination.
"Barbatos, can you focus on something productive for once?"
Gu Sanqiu sighed and rubbed his face. How Barbatos earned money didn't matter, but did this mean he could finally make the Archon pay for drinks tonight?
Wait.
Gu Sanqiu frowned. "Didn't the tavern ban you from buying alcoholic drinks? How exactly are you going to treat me? Don't tell me I have to go in and buy them for you."
Barbatos patted Gu Sanqiu's waist confidently.
"Relax, nephew. If it's just me, of course the staff wouldn't sell to me. But with you here…"
Barbatos flashed a smug smile, as if everything was under his control.
"All you need to do is vouch for me as an adult. With your reputation in Mondstadt and your rapport with the tavern owner, they'll believe you."
"And if you come with me to the Knights of Favonius to file an official guarantee, I'll be able to openly enjoy drinks in the taverns!"
Barbatos' eyes sparkled with anticipation. "That's why I chose Angel's Share. With your help, I can crack this wide open. Soon, every tavern in Mondstadt will be mine for the picking!"
…
Thanks to Mondstadt's local production, even someone like Barbatos—a bard with an inconsistent income—didn't find drinking too costly. That's why Mondstadters often indulged in a drink or two during their downtime.
Helping Barbatos get a guarantee wasn't a big deal. It would make finding him easier in the future, which was to Gu Sanqiu's benefit as well.
Great. Now Mondstadt's tavern owners would have one more super-drunkard to deal with.
---
...
Huh. You really stuck it out all the way to the end.
Didn't think you had the patience. Guess I was wrong.
WiseTL's the one who actually made all this come together. I'm just here putting a bow on it… or, well, shoving it in a backpack and calling it a day. Same thing.
If you had fun, you know what to do:
👉 [patreon.com/WiseTL]
Heads up—Patreon's 50% off for all tiers during May. So if you were on the fence? Now's the time.
And if you're the social type, there's a Discord too. Pretty decent spot to hang out—no battles required.
👉 [discord.gg/wisetl]
Alright. That's enough standing around. Go on—before you make it weird.
—Leaf