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Chapter 136 - Ch136. Retribution of the ramen gods

"This is a ramen stand." Kankuro flatly said to Ren as he sat down on a chair in the Ichiraku. He expected something different when Ren claimed to take them to the 'best restaurant in Konoha'.

Even Temari seemed a bit let down, but she was hiding it well enough. Gaara and Baki, however, didn't seem to care at all and instantly went to sit on the other side of the stall, Baki whispering something in a hushed tone to the disgruntled Gaara.

Ren inwardly shrugged, not bothering with the two.

"Well spotted." He teased Kankuro with a small, amused smile. "You almost deserve the promotion with just that."

But there was no bite in his words anymore, and Kankuro simply rolled his eyes at him in a friendly way.

Ren's mission to gauge their conduct was over. Well, not really. He should have continued with it, even if Temari discovered his intent. But Ren decided it didn't matter. It's not as if he could yeet them out of the exams if they behaved badly.

The mission was just a formality.

He would only be writing a report about their behavior, which would be sent to Suna and might have a tiny, teensy, little, very small effect on the final decision concerning their promotion.

But honestly, he doubted Suna's higher-ups would take it seriously anyway. Firstly, there is room for the foreign chunins doing these reports to be disingenuous. That made them a flawed intel by default.

And secondly, the people in the know were very aware that this part of the exams served as a way to form a psychological profile for future prospective talents. The villages usually sent their brightest to the Exams in order to show off, so the host village simply decided to get something out of it right off the bat.

Information was key in the ninja world, and this was an effortless way to get some of it.

Ren's report would no doubt be studied and filed away for later use. It's probably why he and the other guiding chunin were warned not to slack off.

"This is the best ramen stand in Konoha." Ren told Kankuro, and he wasn't even lying. Sure, one of the reasons why he took them here was that he didn't feel like spending a lot of money on them. But they didn't need to know that.

"With the best ramen chef in the world, Teuchi, the Sage of Six Ramens!" He grandly boasted to better sell the deal to them, making Teuchi chuckle and shake his head from behind the counter.

Both Kankuro and Temari seemed amused at that proclamation, not taking it even a little bit seriously, and Ren smiled back at them, sharing in their amusement.

During their walk through Konoha to Ichiraku, Ren and the Suna team did proper introductions, and Ren stopped trying to rile them up. He took them seriously and gave them a proper tour through Konoha's public areas, showing them where everything was and which shops had the best deals.

They became way less on guard and eased up when they saw that Ren was treating them with no hostility. He might even say they became friendlier.

There was still that undercurrent of tension in them, and if Ren had no idea about the upcoming invasion, he would probably believe it was there due to the stress from the Exams. They were hiding their nerves quite well.

"Say, is there something you could tell us about the Exams?" Temari, who was sitting on Kankuro's other side from Ren, suddenly asked, fishing for information.

Ren's eyes glinted, and he leaned closer, whispering. "Yes. I heard something interesting about them."

This caused both Temari and Kankuro to also lean closer with bated breaths and interest shining in their eyes, hoping for some special intel about their upcoming trials.

"There are some really sexy girls participating this year." Ren whispered, giving Temari an obvious once-over with his eyes, making her slightly blush with a small, involuntary smile appearing on her face that betrayed she did not get compliments like this often.

Inwardly, Ren mostly meant Ino and Hinata, and gave her that look to tease her, but he had to admit, she was good-looking, too. This version of Temari was eighteen according to her documents, and she grew up to be very pretty. Her hairstyle looked way better in real life than it did in 2D, too.

Realizing she wouldn't get anything out of Ren, Temari huffed in annoyance and put her cheek on her hand.

Honestly? It was a good try. Ren had to give it to the girl. It's better to try it and get no result rather than not try anything. But it was a tad bit naive to think he would give them some sort of secret information for free.

"Sexy... right." Kankuro muttered and gave Temari a teasing, dubious glance before he turned toward Ren. "I am not seeing it."

"Shut it, make-up boy." Temari dryly responded and bumped his shoulder with hers. "You wear a catsuit. You have forfeited your right to judge others when you put that on in the morning."

"You suck." Kankuro pouted, and Ren had the impression that this was a common thing between them.

Still, he could not waste the golden opportunity Kankuro presented him.

"Oh, does she?" He asked, giving Kankuro and Temari the best shocked look he could manage and averted his eyes the second they looked at him with a faint whisper of, "Kinky."

That made both of them sputter and start spouting hurried denials, while Ren was inwardly grinning.

The discussion flowed from there, and Ren had to admit, he surprisingly enjoyed the time with these two Suna siblings more than he probably should have. They were cool.

He especially did not expect to hit it off with the catsuit enthusiast, but they started talking about the possibilities of puppetry, and both got kind of engrossed in it while Temari occasionally quipped a thing or two on the topic.

At times, it got awkward because Kankuro couldn't divulge Suna's secrets, but Ren didn't mind. He simply told the boy to straight up tell him when something was a secret, so they could move on to a different topic.

That, more than anything, put both of the Suna siblings at ease. It showed them that Ren did not talk to them because he was trying to ferret out the secrets of their craft, and was truly interested in the topic.

Somewhere along the line, the talk switched toward the Wind Release, and Ren confessed it was his affinity. That's when Temari seemingly lit up, and before Ren knew it, the girl bullied the exasperated Kankuro to switch seats with her.

She started asking questions about Ren's experiences with training his Wind Release, careful not to poke at any secrets, but still too curious to drop the topic.

And Ren indulged her.

There were things that the villages guarded with ferocity, but there were also exercises that were more or less well-known and could be easily shared. Such as the Konoha's leaf exercise.

They were doing it with rocks in Suna, which is why their Wind Techniques were more geared toward brute force than control, according to Temari.

It was quite fascinating for Ren to compare the cultures and how that changed their approach to ninja training. But their talks were interrupted by Teuchi, who was done with his cooking and put three bowls of steaming hot ramen in front of them.

They dug in, and Ren enjoyed the surprise on Temari and Kankuro's faces after they had their first bite. Teuchi definitely deserved to be called a Sage.

He wouldn't go quite as far as Naruto and proclaim it the food of the gods, but for its price, the ramen tasted very good.

"Eh, it's not bad." Kankuro hummed in appreciation, and Temari nodded.

"Careful." Ren chuckled. "The ramen gods will send their retribution your way if you don't praise it more."

Teuchi threw Ren an exasperated look, one Ren promptly ignored, and Kankuro rolled his eyes.

"As if that would hap-"

Only for Konohamaru to suddenly rush into the ramen stand with panic written on his face, misjudge his momentum, and ram his forehead straight into the middle of Kankuro's back.

This caused the catsuit-wearing boy to lose his balance... and before they knew it, Kankuro's face was firmly planted inside of his ramen bowl, just as the panting Naruto and visibly angry Sakura entered the stand as well.

Konohamaru fell on his ass with "Ow." and a small bump on his forehead before an awkward silence filled the surroundings.

Kankuro slowly raised his head out of the bowl, his drenched face resembling modern art with all the smudged war paint all over it, with occasional noodle decoration stuck here and there.

"Well... Now I am happy we switched seats, brother." Temari interrupted the silence with a snicker, just as Kankuro turned toward Konohamaru, looking positively murderous.

"Brat… you are so dead." He declared with a growl, noodles comically hanging on his head.

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