"Honey... wake up~"
"Hubby, it's time to wake up!"
"Darling, wake-"
"Aiko-"
"-"
"Weird... It's been a week since I've been getting these types of dreams. Do they mean something? Or is it just my teenage hormones kicking in?"
Aizawa Aiko, 16 years old, 190cm, handsome. Very handsome. Did I forget to say I was handsome?Just kidding, I'm plain average. If I were a to look like a k-pop idol, that would be a different story.
Never got any love letters or even held a girl's hand in my life. Ahahaha...
Anyway... I was reincarnated 15 years ago and I'm a orphan.
Great!
Well, what is so special about me that I got this rare chance in the first place?
I don't know!
Fifteen years ago, I was given a second chance at life. How, you ask? Well, I got run over by a truck and suddenly found myself reborn as a baby. Classic trope, isn't it? But what makes me so special to deserve this rare chance? I have no idea.
One thing I can tell you about myself is that I despise women to the core. Wanna know why?
They made my life worse in every way. Just because I looked a certain way, suddenly all of them wanted the end of me. From elementary school, middle school, high school to my job. What did I even do to them to make them hate me this way?
The only women I could truly tolerate were oba-sans, grandmas so to speak and my mom. They were the only people that actually talked to me like I was another human being and didn't show a face of disgust seeing me for the first time.
I never had any friends, well any "real" male friends. I was constantly being used to do "dirty" work, whether in school or in my job.
I never could talk about my past experiences or how I felt. Depressed, miserable. Basically I got all the nerfs without any of the buffs.
The only thing I could say anything good about myself was maybe I was a bit smart?
But that was it.
Hobbies? I didn't have any. Video games were the only thing I truly enjoyed. Everything else just didn't click for me.
Old and miserable, I'm kind of happy that all of that ended when I died. I wish it had happened sooner. I've thought about suicide multiple times but never actually went through with it. I'm scared of death and the pain that comes with it. I mean, who isn't? Even the most muscular, macho man you've ever seen is also scared of death but doesn't show it.
But here I am, given a second chance. A chance to live again, to maybe find some meaning in this existence. Yet, I can't help but wonder, what's the point? Will things be different this time? Or am I doomed to repeat the same cycle of loneliness that I once was never able to break?
So, here I am, sitting in the classroom, listening to the boring voice of a teacher explaining math.
"Today, let's learn about quadrati-"
"Милый~"
Huh? What was that?
I turn my gaze to the right.
Looking at me directly in my eyes with a flirtatious smile - Alisa Mikhailovna Kujou, a girl with an ethereal and captivating physical appearance. WIth her almond-shaped eyes, long, silver hair and a hourglass figure. Wait... flirtatious smile? I'm imagining things
Even if I did hate women, I do have to admit, she was a true beauty.
Anyway... Why is she looking at me?
I gesture her with my eyes at the teacher.
Her smile widens.
What?
Kujou-san, were in class right now. Can you not look at me like that? Even if the class is boring, you shouldn't look at me. Look at another person! My face is hideous!
Wait. Maybe she's just looking outside. Yeah! I'm a dumbass! How could a girl like her look at me?
I turn my gaze back outside.
1, 2, 3 ,4 ,5...
I turn my gaze towards her again.
She's looking at me with the same face expression...
Why do I have to deal with this?
"Ano, Kujou-san, the teacher..." - I say with a almost silent voice.
"Милый~" - she responds
What? Girl, I don't understand Russian, please respond in a language I can understand! You are making this hard for me!
Maybe if I just don't look at her she won't notice me... Yeah I'll do that.
I turn my gaze back to the board.
10 minutes pass...
AHHHHHHHHH
She's still looking...
Maybe she finds the sky interesting? I mean it's blue, it has clouds. Very beatiful.
I turn my gaze towards her again.
"Kujou-"
"Alisa"
Huh?
"Call me Alisa"
Mikhailovna-san, isn't this too straightforward? I mean... we barely know each other. Maybe she wants something from me... I never had a girl show actual attraction for me, so I doubt she actually likes me.
Shouldn't we, you know, start with the basics?
Getting to know each other, knowing what we like, what we dislike, helping each other, studying together... and then we can proceed with romantic things, like... holding... hands! Kyaaaaa....
Cough, cough...
I'm overthinking again... this habit of mine... She probably thinks I'm weird now... I should probably respond to her.
"Mikhailovna-san-"
"Alisa" - she responds.
Courting death! You are courting death, Alisa Mikhailovna Kujou!
If I don't what she says she'll probably continue looking at me... Is this her plan? To make me embarrassed? Ah! It won't work! I've been through worse and in those times, I never got embarrassed!
"Alisa" - I respond.
"Yes, Aiko?"
...I've been defeated.
"Were in class you know? The teacher might scold us. I advise you start paying attention to him."
"Yes, he might, but I like looking at you more."
Ahhh... I don't care anymore.
"Is that right? Do what you want I guess."
I turn my gaze back to the board.
My social interaction bar is at a all time low! I need to recover.
"Ты такой цундэрэ~"
That was the last time she spoke during class, but atleast she started paying more attention to the teacher... But sometimes I felt her gaze on me.
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Alisa Mikhailovna Kujou POV
My darling...
My honey...
Милый...
Why? Why did you have to die like that? Why couldn't we just grow old together? Why couldn't we see our children grow like the other married couples? Our grandchildren aswell.
Does the universe hate us? Why can't we just be together? How many times do you have to suffer for us to succeed in living together?
Please, let this be the last time. I can't bear anymore seeing your cold body lying on the ground. The memories of our life together , they were beautiful. I remember the way you smiled, the sound of your laughter, the warmth of your touch. Those moments were everything to me.
I close my eyes and see your face, but when I open them, you're not there. The emptiness is unbearable. I reach out, hoping to feel your hand in mine, but there's nothing but cold air. The world feels so empty without you.
We had so many dreams, so many plans. We talked about traveling the world, about building a home filled with love and laughter. We dreamed of watching our children take their first steps, of hearing their first words. We imagined growing old together, sitting on our porch, holding hands as the sun set.
But every time... every time, it all goes away. I've tried everything, I don't want to lose you anymore... I'm tired...
I wish I could turn back time, to hold you more, to not lose you again, to tell you how much I love you. I wish I could change the course of events, to save you from the fate that takes you away from me everytime. But I can't, and that helplessness is a pain unlike any other.
I don't want to lose you again, not anymore. This will be the last time. I promise.
"I love you" - I muttered quietly.
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Aizawa Aiko POV
It's been a month since I've been in this class and like usually I don't really have any friends. I mean who would want to be with a loner like me?
Anyway... It's lunch time! Perfect for a guy for me, I can choose a cozy spot where no one will bother me. In this case... a stairwell! It's kind of abandoned and nobody really passes by here, so I have this place all for myself.
My bento is kind of basic... like my life. I don't really like to make things hard for myself, so I just eat basic meals. Eggs, meat, dairy, fruits, fish. Vegetables are bad and they bloat you, also they are green, green is bad color. Only vegetable I eat raw is a carrot.
I suddenly hear some footsteps...
Masaka! Somebody is really passing by here? Who is it? Has my time finally come? I won't go down without a fight! I've trained in martial arts you know?
Suddenly those footsteps stop right infront of me.
With her rare white hair that you don't see everyday and cheeky smile, I already knew you she was.
"White oni?"
"How rude!"
"What are you doing here, Mikhailovna-san?"
"Hm?"
She looks at me with a raised eyebrow.
"...Alisa"
She smiles.
"Do you want to eat together?"
I stare at her for a few seconds.
"...No"
"Ah?"
"I meant yes, of course, I would like to eat with a girl like you!" - I said with a plain tone.
"Great! Ты такой милый~"
This is abuse. Abuse! I'm telling you.
Should of picked another spot to eat. My spider senses earlier were tingling and I didn't listen. This is completely my fault. My defeat. 0-1 in your favor Kujou-san.
But gotta say, her bento is sugoi! The bento box wasmasterpiece of culinary art, probably meticulously prepared by private chefs who poured their hearts into every detail. Not to mention when she opened it, the smell, amazing, 10/10.
She looks at me with a smile
"Do you want to take a bite?"
"... I'm fine. I don't really have a big appetite anyway..."
"Okay then!"
Why is she so cheerful? Is this the aura of an extrovert? I'm getting blinded by it. It's too much!
"Ne, Aiko, can I call you that?"
Straight with the names huh?
"If it's not a bother for you, then go ahead. You already called me that anyway."
"It will never be a bother for me."
Is she flirting? Nah, impossible.
"Anyway, I wanted to ask, would you be willing to be friends with me?"
"Huh?"
I look at her, baffled. Is this some kind of meticulously devised plan that she has and planning to destroy me in the future? No chance!
"I-"
"You're probably thinking that I'm planning to destroy in the future, right?"
Is she a mind reader!?
"Now you're thinking I'm some kind of mind reader, am I right?"
Esper!! Esper, I'm telling you! I need to get away from this girl ASAP!
I move away from her slightly.
Her smile widens.
"So, uhh, Alisa? What was that about being friends with me?
"Oh! I want to be friends with you, Aiko!"
But this the second time we're talking, shouldn't we get to know each better? I don't know how this works... My social interaction bar is almost depleted, can't continue. Retreat! Retreat!!
I look at her confused, but don't reply.
"You're probably wondering why want I to be friends with you right? Well, does it need to have a reason? I just want to get to know you better!"
Yeah, right, I've heard that somewhere. And after that they used me and ditched me afterwards after when I helped them.
"I refus-"
"I know you would"
Hm?
"But even then I still want to be friends with you"
This woman... How do I even talk to her, I wish she would just curse me, so I could send her away back from where she came from.
"Alisa, why do you want to be friends with me? I mean, there isn't anything special about me, I'm ugly, my personality is bad, I can't really show my emotions, I don't really have any hobbies. I'm just a bland character, an NPC, in a world full of main characters. Not to mention, our classmates would probably talk bad things about you..."
I continue rambling. This bad habit of mine. I hate it sometimes. I just keep talking and talking. The "friendships" I ruined because I always said the truth is why I can't really make friends. I wish I could just die and for all of it to be over.
"Stop right there." - she said.
I stop rambling.
"You're ugly? I don't care about that. You're personality is bad? I'll do the talking then and I'll teach you. Stop berating yourself. You're not the type of guy you think you are. And rumors? I don't care about them. Like I said, do I have to need a reason for me to become friends with you? Isn't it enough that I want to get know you better?"
"But-"
"No buts! I see something in you that you don't see in yourself. Everyone has their own unique qualities and potential. Maybe you just need someone to believe in you, and I'm willing to be that person. We all have our flaws, but that doesn't define who we are. What matters is how we grow and learn from our experiences."
Grow and learn from our experiences huh. Why does she believe in me that much? Did I do something for her? But this is only our second time talking isn't it? Are we secretly childhood friends? Maybe she knows me from the past? Nah, that's dumb.
"So, I ask you once again. Would you be willingly to become friends with me?"
I... want to try... Maybe this time will work... Maybe I won't need to suffer anymore. Maybe, just maybe, I can find a place in this life of mine.
I look silently at her for a few seconds.
"...Okay"
"Great! Take care of me from now on Aiko!"
"So, were friends now?"
"Of course!" - she smiles, showing her white teeth, her eyes twinkling with happiness.
She really is beatiful.
"Oh! And you can call me Alya from now on!"
"Kujou-san?"
"Come on... say it!" - she pouts
"...Alya"
She giggles.
"Yes, Aiko~?"
This feels... rather nice, I completely forgot about this feeling, I don't think I'll get used to it, but I'll try. Can I?
----------------------------------------------------------
We are walking back to our classroom.
Alya is skipping steps while walking. But there's been something on my mind during that conversation.
"Uhh, Alya?"
"Yes?" - She looks at me.
"What cup size are you?"
Uh oh, UH OH. What the he did I just ask? Damn teenage hormones. Me and this big mouth of mine... Well it's over. Goodbye my first and last friend in this life. I had a good run. Sayonara-
"F-cup"
Huh?
"But in the future it'll be a G-cup~."
Who am I?
Why am I here?
"Anything else you wanna ask?"
No, I don't think I will.
"You can ask anything about me you know~" - she smiles.
I stare at her silently. She giggles back at me.
"Let's go! Class is about to start!" - she continues walking, while I stand there like a corpse.
...I won't suddenly die tomorrow, right?
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Damn, I went overboard with this chapter, ignore the cringe interactions beetwen characters, I am trying my best here. 😭