Thinking of Jake again brought a wave of sadness. Memories of us together, the good times we shared, flooded my mind, making me feel even more miserable. But I quickly forced myself to cheer up. I decided to stop dwelling on him. Even though those memories pulled at my heart and made me ache, I knew I had to move forward. The urge to call him, to reach out and hear his voice, was strong—yet I resisted. I understood that I couldn't do anything to change the past or fix things right now. Instead, I resolved to let time take its course and see where it would lead me.
I found myself continuing to prepare late-night snacks for Lukas, often lost in thought. It struck me that I hadn't been able to go to the supermarket for several days, and my ingredients were running low. Unsure of what else to do, I decided to improvise with what I had. I cooked the leftover rice and side dishes into a pot of porridge, adding some seafood ingredients for flavor. Though it didn't look very appealing, I poured my sincerity into it.
To my surprise, Lukas actually ate it that night.
I was momentarily stunned, unable to fully understand his reaction or state of mind. Still, this incident sparked my curiosity. I decided to conduct some experiments, preparing three different dinner options each night—one of them always being the porridge with varying side ingredients. This routine continued for nearly two weeks, without exception. Strangely, aside from the porridge, nothing else was touched.
A wave of incredulousness washed over me. It became clear to me that Lukas might be a stubborn person—able to eat the same dish night after night without ever tiring of it. A strange thought then flickered through my mind: 'I wonder if he does the same with the people he likes?' The suddenness of that realization startled me, catching me off guard.
But almost immediately, a bittersweet smile touched my lips. Whether that special person appeared or not, I couldn't shake the feeling that Lukas and I were destined to be bound together in this life.
~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~
Another month had slipped by, and I found myself quite accustomed to this new rhythm of life. Even when I happened to be alone with Lukas at home, I no longer felt the same nervous tension I once had. Gradually, I let my guard down, especially since Lukas hadn't done anything to me since our last kiss—at least, not in the way we had agreed.
However, despite my efforts to relax, I couldn't ignore the subtle but persistent influence of his pheromones. Their unintentional release still affected me, lingering in the air and stirring a quiet, unspoken tension within me. It was as if the invisible pull between us remained, impossible to ignore completely.
As Lukas had mentioned earlier, if mates aren't marked by each other—and I still hadn't marked him to claim him as mine—then the unmarked person would struggle to experience sexual pleasure. Lukas could only release his desire when he needed me. However, due to his promise, he couldn't act on those urges with me, although he could at least find relief in places where I was present, as the scent of me being his marked mate, would allow him to do so.
One night, while I was asleep, I was suddenly awakened by his pheromones. The unbearably strong and lustful scent sent shivers down my spine, and I felt an overwhelming heat pooling within me. As an Omega, I was naturally more sensitive to pheromones, and after holding back for two months, my own desires had grown intense.
I bit down hard on my blanket, trying to suppress the urge to touch myself. Even through the thick walls, I could still catch the scent of his lust in the air, and I knew exactly what he was doing, which made my face flush in embarassment.
Desperately, I tried to calm myself. 'I need to escape... I can't stay here any longer,' I thought, panic rising within me. I knew Lukas would soon lose control, just like he had when he was drugged.
Panic had completely overtaken me, clouding my thoughts and drowning out any concern about what was in the middle of the night. I didn't care that I was only in pajamas or that my mind was spiraling into chaos. The haunting images flashed through my mind again, filling me with guilt and confusion.
'I can't betray him again... I won't betray Jake...' I thought desperately, my hands trembling as I scrambled out of bed. I didn't even notice the loud noise I made in my haste. My fingers fumbled with the doorknob as I threw open the door, my heart pounding, and hurried toward the front door.
Just as I reached for the handle and was about to turn it, a voice called out from Lukas' closed room, soft yet unmistakably urgent: "Stella..."
A cold wave of fear washed over me, and I felt all the blood drain from my body. My limbs froze in place, rooted to the spot. I knew I should ignore him, keep running, but the truth was, I couldn't—especially since he was an Alpha. The instinct to obey, to submit, took over despite my trembling body and racing mind.
"Come here," he repeated, his voice low and commanding.
Without thinking, my feet moved of their own accord, drawing me closer to his room. My heart hammered in my chest, each step filled with dread. When I finally stopped in front of the door, it suddenly swung open. A hand shot out, grabbing me roughly and pulling me inside before I could resist.
In an instant, I was pressed harshly against the closed door, my body trembling under the weight of the situation and the overwhelming feelings swirling within me.
I squeezed my eyes shut tightly, desperately trying to block out everything—his face, his presence, the overwhelming emotions flooding through me. I didn't want to see him, didn't want to face whatever might come next. It felt safer to hide behind my eyelids, to pretend I was somewhere else, anywhere else.
But then he gently lifted my chin, forcing me to look at him. His touch was firm yet almost tender, and I felt the weight of his gaze, heavy with unspoken words.
"Look at me," he commanded softly but insistently.
I could still sense his pheromones lingering in the air, a potent scent that amplified his dominant aura, making it almost impossible to resist. It pressed down on me like an invisible force, trying to sway my will and surrender.
"Don't you trust my promise to you? Is that why you want to run away from me?" he asked, his voice tinged with a mixture of concern and something darker.
I shook my head silently. I didn't want to run away—not really. But the fear, the betrayal I felt when I was marked, was deeply rooted in my heart. It was instinctive—an act born from confusion, from not knowing how to tell the difference between my past pain and my present situation. Words escaped me; I was overwhelmed, unable to explain what I was feeling, how tangled my emotions truly were.
He looked at me, his eyes filled with a conflicted struggle, as he fought to suppress his desire. His voice was low, almost strained. "You also know that this is in our nature, right? Do you want to resist like this for the rest of your life?"
His words left me speechless, a heavy weight pressing down on my chest. I had known the truth all along, but confronting it was another matter entirely. The pain of being forced away from Jake, the love we shared, was already unbearable. Now, I was being asked to accept intimacy with others—a betrayal that cut even deeper. My tears betrayed my inner turmoil, slipping silently down my cheeks. "But I can't deceive myself..." I whispered, my voice trembling. "I still love Jake."
Lukas' jaw clenched, his teeth grinding as he fought to contain himself. He took a deep breath, steadying himself before speaking again, his tone more controlled but tinged with a hint of bitterness. "No one forces you to lie to yourself. Emotional and physical needs are two-way, and this does not conflict..."
I was momentarily stunned by his remark, the words hanging heavily in the air. I hadn't even realized how close we had become as we spoke, our faces mere inches apart. Without thinking, I raised my hand and gently wiped the corner of his lips, an instinctive gesture born from a mixture of hesitation and something deeper.
Almost immediately, Lukas lowered his head, capturing my lips in a kiss. His lips were firm yet possessive, and I didn't resist—fear of provoking his anger kept me still. "You said that only if I agree..." I murmured softly, my voice trembling.
He looked into my eyes, his expression unreadable for a moment before he responded, "I promised you, remember?" His tone was calm but insistent. Then, he pressed his lips to my neck, and I let out a soft whimper, overwhelmed by the intensity of the moment. I could feel his tongue sensibly licking, as if trying to savor my scent that lingered in the air, making my head spin.
I was losing myself in the sensation, the kisses and the closeness making it hard to think clearly. "But you've held back for too long..." I managed to whisper, my voice barely audible.
He coaxed me gently, his voice soothing yet commanding. "I promise I won't go in. I'll just rub—no more than that."
After a moment of silence, I hesitated, weighing my options and fears. Finally, I nodded, giving in as if it were a compromise, though my heart was pounding with conflicting emotions.