Lindsey pov
It's 2:00 pm, and Mom and Dad ain't back from the outing together with Andrew. I stared at the clock in my room as it ticked off slowly, lowly, and before I realised how long I'd been staring at it, I dozed off and by the time I woke up, it was evening, and their car horn came in at the perfect time.
'Finally,' I exhaled tiredly as I got down from my bed. It's been all sorts of loneliness since they left. Chloe, my best friend, and I were supposed to go out together, but she suddenly changed our plans, and I was left alone to find out what to do.
In my 8 years of staying with my foster parents as an only child, everything was the best in the way it could. With me being their favourite child and them putting all of their attention on me. I was adopted by them from the orphanage when I was 3, but then, I was cared for like their biological daughter. I barely had reason to think about my parents because I never lacked anything.
I was provided with everything by them aside from the torture which started not long after Mom gave birth to Andrew, 14 years ago. He suddenly became their favourite child, and I was made to nourish the memories of when I was Mom and Dad's princess.
They still care for me, but it's only a few of the care they were showing at first that I have now. It's not the same anymore and I'm aware it's because they now have a son of their own. After all, I was only adopted to save them from loneliness. They were married for 5 years but couldn't bear a child. It was the reason why they resulted in adoption.
"Did you go for your outing?" Mom asked when I got outside to welcome them in. Dad was still in the car, and Andrew was making his way into the house with both hands occupied by an outing bag. He didn't spare me a glance, and I didn't let my eyes waste their time on him before returning it to Mom's face.
"Chloe changed her mind. I was waiting for you to be back but then I slept off," I shared with her. Mom raised her eyebrows like she was thinking about something before she handed her handbag over to me.
"Did you get anything for me, Mom? Since I couldn't come along with you," I had wanted to go with them but Andrew bluntly told me not to come along. I looked at my parents in the eyes, and none of them said a word to support me. Andrew always gets what he wants and it won't be new if they agree with him again.
"Interrogation right from the doorstep?" Mom blurted in a strict tone and the smile I had on my face disappeared. She's upset again. Mom was upset over what I usually get pinched on playfully on my cheeks whenever I inquired until Andrew joined us.
"I made dinner," they must have had a lot to eat during their outing, but I could not think about feeding myself alone while cooking, so I included theirs in the food.
"I'll have coffee. I doubt if your dad is even interested," that's better, at least she referred to him as my dad. Even if her rejection hurt somewhere, I smiled at the fact that she hadn't taken the right to see him as my father from me.
"Maybe Andrew would love to eat," we walked into the house, but Mom didn't stop at the sitting room. She walked straight up to her room and I followed her.
"He has a lot to eat from already. You can ask him if he has some to spare with you. It was a tiring day today," Mom yawned, and I realized how tired she was by the sound of that.
I faked a smile and handed the bag over to her before stepping out of the room.
Many painful thoughts flooded my mind and I wondered why. Why was I pained that they didn't buy anything for me? I should have gotten used to not getting anything whenever they go out. No, it's whenever Andrew goes with them. They do everything he says and forget that I'm probably in the picture.
"Lindsey," Andrew called my name. I rolled my eyes before turning to see him coming out of his room. I pressed my lips hard on each other as I stared at the boy who was the reason why I lost my parent's affection for me.
"What??" I snapped, not hiding the anger in my voice from him. He frowned, throwing me a hard glare before strolling over to where I was standing.
"I need you to make me a hot coffee," the words rolled out of his mouth. There was no pleading in his tone. Instead, he said it like it was an order. He wasn't taught any manners and he never tried to acquire them.
"What happened to your hands?" I asked, staring down at them to see him holding a soft drink in one of them. My instinct told me the reason why he came out was to flaunt that before my eyes and get me angry with it.
'My problems are bigger than getting anger over a sugary drink, Andrew.'
"Make me a hot coffee, Lindsey," he ignored my question to demand again. I rolled my eyes, staring up at him because he was taller than me. It wouldn't be easy to display the overwhelming feeling of anger that I was battling with before him.
I was heading to the kitchen to make one for Mom, but if he thinks he could speak to me without manners and expect something from me, I'm not going to agree with that tonight.
"Go over to the dispenser and get yourself some, Andrew. Don't call my name again," I said with a hard glare; then I walked away from there. Whatever he has to say can stick to his body when he's done glaring.
"You stayed at home all day just to be lazy, you short witch?" he cursed with anger behind me.
Even if he had just insulted me, I love how angry my reaction made him feel.
*
I guess my heart was too kind for my good. I told him that I wouldn't, but I still ended up making the coffee for him. Even if I didn't take it to him, I know he'll come get it when he's done wandering around the dining table.
We're supposed to have a good relationship if not because he allowed Mom and Dad's pampering to get into his empty head. I received a lot of pampering, even more than him, but I didn't allow it to steal my true self. If I allowed it, I wouldn't be nice to him when I could, even after he rendered me lonely without my perfection over me anymore.
Andrew took advantage of the love they showed to him and he used it as a weapon to be wicked. Even if I show him that I don't care about him, it's not like I don't crave to have a healthy sibling relationship with my brother. He's just too stubborn to be given a trial.
It's all his fault for always reminding me that I don't belong to the family biologically. He told that to me so many times until I started hating him for it. It's the truth, but I never asked for him to tell me. I already know but I chose not to give it a long thought.
Mom and Dad never said anything to stop him whenever he was hurting me with my harsh reality. Both of them reacted like they were waiting to have their biological child, and then they would say to my face that I was never truly wanted by them.
"Add some cold water to it; it's too hot for me," Mom complained when I took the coffee she requested to her. I thought she would have been sleeping when I got there but I met her dressed in a new set of pajamas and was sitting on the bed while operating her phone.
"Do you want to say something?" My gaze on her was too obvious that she asked. I want to communicate my thoughts with her but I don't know how to relay the information. It's always chaotic whenever I ask, but I can't spare myself from not asking today.
"I wanted to ask about my admission, Mom," I finally shared. I waited for days for them to say something about it, but it seemed they'd forgotten that it was my third year after graduating from high school, and I deserved to get into a university.
"Didn't we say we will handle it? Didn't I tell you to hold on?" She snapped. "Hold on?" That's the same words they've been telling me for three years. I've spent the last three years wandering around the house and running errands.
I'll watch Andrew get ready for school and wish I wasn't done with my high school early. Seeing most of my mates flaunting their matriculation gowns or their lives on campus hurts me anytime I see it.
I have nothing to show up for aside from the four corners of the wall in my room. That's the only thing I've held on to closely for years. I am tired and can't continue living my life like this.
"I know, Mom, but I checked the website and realised that they've started giving out admissions to new students. I haven't even gone for my screening or written the entrance exam," I relayed softly.
Instead of saying anything, Mom picked up the mug to have a mouthful amount of coffee in her mouth. The room was silent and my inner self was shaking out of nervousness. It's like I always know the truth about everything but still don't want to accept it to myself. Mom didn't want to tell me either, and for that, I was made to have anxiety whenever the discussion came up.
A pregnant pause passed between us, and I was planning on what else to say when the door to the room was opened behind me. With the hefty footsteps, I already knew it was Dad even before I turned to see. "Good evening, Dad," I greeted.
"How are you, Lindsey?" Dad replied in a stressed voice. I answered and he walked deeper into the room before stopping when he got to the dressing table. I watched him briefly, and when he started taking off his jewellery, my eyes found their way back to Mom's face.
"Do you need something? You should be in your room," Dad said to me after he was done by the dressing table. His long legs, which Andrew had gotten, strolled to where the couch was placed, and he sat down on it. His hand moved from his side downward as he wanted to take off his shoes.
"She came to ask after her admission, even after I told her to let us handle it," Mom blurted before I could answer him. The softness that I've grown to know in her voice isn't there, instead it portrayed anger.
"They've started the screening, Dad," I said out of nowhere because it's not what I should continue keeping to myself. They may not like the idea of me checking that and disturbing them with it but it's my future we're talking about.
"Did he ask you that? Were you supposed to speak when I'm talking to him?" Mom sharply snapped at me. I flinched within myself but I didn't leave the spot where I was standing. I'm used to it. She always shouts whenever I talk about it. I already prepared myself for her reaction.
"Why can't you listen to your mom, Lindsey," Dad, whom I thought would help his Princess out, spoke in favour of Mom. I sighed speechlessly; with the both of them on each other's side, it'd be hard for me to know what to say.
"She doesn't even listen to me anymore. I am here thinking about how to take care of Andrew's disease, but she's here troubling us about going to school. Her brother's life never means anything to her," here we go, she's prioritising Andrew over me again.
For as much as I don't like him, I never wished for evil to befall him. I know about his constant sickness but never knew it was a disease until Mom mentioned it now. I don't know what sort of disease is worrying him or what the name is, but even with his illness, that brat won't be good to me. Why should I be overly good to him?
"Go to your room, Lindsey. And read the room next time before thinking selfishly about yourself," Mom barked at me, and it hurt terribly. My trembling feet walked heavily out of the room, and the moment I was out of the room, I busted into tears.
How did I go from sleeping in between them every night with their hands ruffling my hair lovingly to being sent out of the room in a strict voice? What did I do wrong?