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Being a professor at an ancient magical school like Hogwarts was not a simple job. The Defence Against the Dark Arts post had seen its requirements lowered over the decades, thanks to the infamous curse. Still, the basic duties remained. Grading homework, writing lesson plans, and making exams—all these tasks fell to the professor.
For Dracula, these repetitive jobs were incredibly dull. He quickly decided he needed another way.
'Are you sure you want to hire Quirrell as your teaching assistant?' Dumbledore asked. His voice held a note of resignation as he stroked Fawkes, the trembling phoenix. Dracula had just appeared in the Headmaster's office without any warning, startling the magical bird from its nap.
Truthfully, Dracula held the Hogwarts deed. This meant he had access to every corner of the castle. Anti-Apparition wards and other protective spells did not affect him. He could come and go as he pleased.
Dracula gently patted Fawkes. He then sat across from Dumbledore and took a blood-flavoured lollipop that was offered.
'Of course. I have no interest in doing such boring work,' he replied, popping the lollipop into his mouth. 'You were going to approve Quirrell's application anyway, weren't you? He must have some teaching ability.'
Dracula felt quite clever about his idea. It would save him from tedious tasks. Plus, it would let him keep a close eye on Quirrell's secrets—a perfect opportunity.
Dumbledore rubbed his brow. A headache was clearly starting.
'To be honest', he admitted, 'the Defence Against the Dark Arts post has such a bad reputation that hardly any respectable wizard wants it. I can't say much about Quirrell's teaching. But since he's willing, he's welcome. Besides, the school year is about to start, and we simply don't have the budget for another assistant.'
'That's easily fixed,' Dracula said. He snapped the lollipop in half and tossed the stick out the window. 'Just give half my salary to Quirrell.'
Dracula had wealth built up over centuries, so he was very generous. 'Write to him now. See if he'll accept. I am the main shareholder of Hogwarts, after all. Surely I can hire a teaching assistant if I wish.'
Dumbledore could only sigh. He picked up his quill, wrote a letter appointing Quirrell as a teaching assistant, and sent it off by owl.
Dracula nodded, satisfied, and walked towards the window.
'Wait, Professor Dracula,' Dumbledore called out.
Dracula turned.
'Are you free now? Most of the professors have arrived. Would you like to join us in the Great Hall? You could have a meal and meet your colleagues.'
In the end, Dracula decided it was a good idea to meet the other professors. They would be working together for a while, and it was best not to start off on bad terms.
He and Dumbledore left the Headmaster's office on the 8th floor. They went down the rotating staircase to the 4th floor. Then, they walked along a corridor and navigated a long stone staircase.
'Jumping out the window is still much quicker,' Dracula muttered, finishing another lollipop.
'Professor Dracula', Dumbledore said with a wry smile, 'you are about to be a formal professor. You must set a good example for the students. If troublemakers start jumping out of windows, Madam Pomfrey will be very cross with you. Also, to avoid complaints from parents, you should hide your vampire traits. Nicolas told me you are different from other vampires and can do this.'
'What a bother,' Dracula grumbled. But, for the sake of the interesting things he expected at Hogwarts, he retracted his sharp fangs.
Soon, they reached the entrance to the Great Hall. They climbed a wide marble staircase. As they stepped inside, a tall, thin witch with black hair and a dark green robe approached Dumbledore. Her expression was serious.
'Albus, the quality of our staff really does need to improve. I was nearly hit by a lollipop stick in the entrance courtyard! And the students aren't even here yet!'
Dracula's face froze when he heard the energetic witch complain. He quickly hid his lollipop. With a tiny flick of black flame, he turned it to ash.
'Minerva, I'll remind them to be more careful,' Dumbledore replied. He was barely hiding his amusement. He gestured towards Dracula. 'This is our new Defence Against the Dark Arts professor, Brad Dracula. Professor Dracula, this is our Deputy Headmistress, Minerva McGonagall.'
Professor McGonagall turned to Dracula. Surprise showed in her eyes for a moment when she saw his unusual appearance. But she quickly composed herself. She offered a polite smile and extended her hand.
'Professor Dracula', she greeted him.
Dracula returned the handshake just as politely. 'Professor McGonagall.'
The sound of their arrival drew the attention of the other professors. They came out from the Great Hall to see the brave—or perhaps very foolish—person who had accepted the cursed job.
The Hogwarts staff was certainly a unique group.
There was Professor Flitwick, Head of Ravenclaw and Charms Master. He was famous for his deep knowledge of charms and his past as a duelling champion.
Professor Sprout, the Head of Hufflepuff, wore a patched hat. She always seemed to have a bit of dirt from the greenhouses on her.
Professor Kettleburn, the Care of Magical Creatures teacher, was missing an arm and half a leg—which perhaps told a story about his job.
As Dracula greeted each professor, he noticed a strange atmosphere. Many of them looked at him with a mixture of pity and regret. One witch, who wore thick, bottle-glass spectacles, even sighed loudly.
'Such a handsome young man,' she murmured. 'Why ever would he choose to become Defence Against the Dark Arts professor?'
Dracula's mouth twitched slightly at her words.
He could not help but think, 'This almost feels like a trick by that old fox Nicolas.'
He kept the thought to himself. But the suspicion stayed with him as he looked around at his new colleagues.
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