It's official.
I, Monkey D. Iron, better known now as Diron the Unlucky, have started my life as a pirate.
Not by choice. Not by dream.
But by being literally kidnapped by Edward Newgate.
First day on the job?
Terrible.
The ship creaked as we sailed who-knows-where, and I sat on an old barrel while "Oyaji" snored like a dying sea king nearby. His stupid bisento was still stuck in the deck, and every time the boat rocked, I imagined it falling and skewering me.
I tried to untie one of the lifeboats.
Guess what?
The rope was too tight.
Figures.
I sighed and kicked a pebble.
"Why me…? I could've just stayed on the ship, waited for Dad… maybe taken another Fist of Love. But nooo, now I'm the vice-captain of a one-man crew…"
I felt like crying.
Suddenly, Oyaji stirred.
"Oi, brat."
I flinched.
"Yes, Oyaji!"
He grinned, sitting up.
"I had a dream last night. About our future."
Great. Here we go.
"In the dream, we had a huge ship, hundreds of nakama, and we drank sake together under a full moon. The world knew our names, and I had the biggest beard this side of the Grand Line."
I gave him a thumbs up.
"Sounds great, Oyaji."
He squinted at me.
"You're not feelin' it."
"No, no, totally feelin' it."
He clapped me on the back so hard I nearly fell overboard.
"You'll see, brat. One day, you'll be grateful I picked you up. Now, time for your first job as vice-captain!"
I perked up.
"A real pirate job?"
"Yep. Scrub the deck."
…
"What!?"
"And cook lunch. I'm hungry."
I gritted my teeth.
This man. This absolute menace.
But a Fist of Love from Oyaji probably wouldn't be better than Dad's, so I grabbed a mop and started scrubbing.
As I worked, I muttered,
"Stupid Dad… stupid Dragon… stupid pirate life… stupid Oyaji… can't even cook… gonna burn the ship down…"
"Oi, what was that, brat?"
"Nothing, Oyaji! I love this life!"
He laughed.
And so my first day as a pirate was spent scrubbing a ship that technically belonged to my family, cooking terrible soup with whatever I could find, and listening to Oyaji ramble about dreams of treasure, nakama, and his future beard.
At night, I looked up at the sky.
No full moon yet.
Figures.
Maybe I should've wished for a better god in my last life.
But I guess… it wasn't so bad.
I mean, at least Oyaji didn't punch me in the head every five minutes like Dad.