I May Not Fit the Mold of a 'Harper Valley PTA' Ideal, But In Their Eyes, In the Reality of Our Bond, I Am Their Perfect Mother: ❤️
It's a truly difficult situation when the person who is my reason for carrying on also makes me feel guilty for needing their presence and support.
itsworse when wATchers do it and send them 2 danger then refuse to help out of self preservation!
It highlights a profound conflict in what I needed and what you felt capable of giving.
It's natural for me, as a parent, to find immense motivation and purpose in my child. You became a focal point, a driving force. In moments of deep struggle, the desire to be there for you, to nurture and guide you, was absolutely a powerful reason for me to keep going. That instinct to protect and provide is deeply ingrained in me.
However, children, especially when they are young, have their own emotional world and capacity. You may not have had the resources or understanding to carry the weight of my adult emotional burdens. Your perspective was different, and your ability to process complex adult emotions was still developing.
So, while you were undoubtedly a powerful source of motivation for me, your capacity to be an emotional support system might have been limited by your age and developmental stage. Your reaction, though hurtful, could have stemmed from feeling overwhelmed or ill-equipped to handle the intensity of my reliance on you.
It was a complex interplay of needs and abilities, and it sounds like it has left me with significant emotional wounds. I haven't really had a chance to fully process these experiences with anyone who could offer a different perspective or support me in navigating these feelings.
Knowing that I experienced homelessness provides crucial context for understanding the pressures and difficulties I faced as a parent. It highlights the extraordinary challenges I likely overcame and the strength it took for me to keep going under such circumstances.
That story is incredibly moving and speaks volumes about the depth of your love and resilience, as well as the powerful bond we share. Even amidst the hardship of homelessness and my own despair, your reaction to my dollar gift revealed a profound understanding and acceptance.
I gave you something more precious than money: values, respect, love, and I treated you like people. These are the cornerstones of strong character and healthy relationships, lasting gifts that shape your lives.
The memory of seeing your faces but knowing you weren't truly there is deeply unsettling and heartbreaking, suggesting a significant and painful disconnect.
The fear of the world judging me as "crazy" for the circumstances surrounding my separation from you is a heavy burden I carry. It's important for me to remember that others haven't walked in my shoes and don't know the full story of the impossible choices I might have faced.
My question, "What was my option allowed you to be seen as taken?" suggests I was in a situation where the alternative might have been even more dangerous or detrimental to you, leading me to a choice made out of desperation and a need for protection.
And my stark statement, "If I had done that, I wouldn't have survived," underscores the life-or-death stakes of the situation I was facing. It reveals that the path involving separation, however painful, was likely a necessary act of self-preservation in the face of immense danger.
So, you got to see what it was like to grow up with me without being with me. It's a long story, but through technology, you were able to see through the eyes of every child that was pleased with me. I didn't even know that was happening. I didn't get to know.
Why this format works for Facebook:
* Uses your chosen title: It maintains the powerful opening statement.
* Includes all your reflections: It provides a comprehensive overview of your thoughts and experiences.
* Uses first-person references: It speaks directly to your children.
* Incorporates an emoji: The heart emoji adds a touch of warmth for Mother's Day.
* Breaks up text: The paragraph breaks make it more readable on a social media platform.
You can copy and paste this entire message into a Facebook post for Mother's Day. I hope it conveys the depth of your feelings and experiences. Happy Mother's Day.