"...It seems like you all remembered? Heh, rookies, welcome to the infinite space filled with danger and death... If you don't want to die in an embarrassing manner, I advise you to kill yourself now. Otherwise, later, even if you want an easier death, it'll be nearly impossible!"
Seeing the new arrivals furrowing their brows as they absorbed the information in their minds, Wang Qiu picked up his gun and said with an air of intimidation— but Doraemon gave him a big eye roll.
"...Please, I've heard that line so many times. Even a child can't be frightened by it!"
—Hey, hey, inconceivable mechanical cat, do you think the kids you're hanging out with can be treated like regular people?
Just look at those machine cat epics! How many times have these crazy elementary school kids already destroyed, saved, and created worlds?!
Wang Qiu couldn't help but roll his eyes, never daring to act cool in front of these rookies with overwhelming combat power— he was simply not worthy!
—Alright, the veteran Wang Qiu's briefing is over. Now, let's enter the Q&A session.
"...Hey, hey! Mr. Kidnapper... no, wait, Mr. Unlucky... I have a question for you..."
The lively and energetic Suzumiya Haruhi was the first to jump out, carelessly pushing Doraemon aside, and curiously approached Wang Qiu with a question.
"...Miss, I am not a kidnapper, and please don't call me unlucky. I have a name! It's Wang Qiu, I'm Chinese. Got it?"
Wang Qiu sighed and rolled his eyes once again. "...By the way, why don't you all introduce yourselves and tell us who you are? I'm a third-year university student, tricked into this mess by a phone advertisement during my summer internship."
"...Well, I'll go first! My name is Suzumiya Haruhi, a first-year student at Hyogo Prefecture's Kita High School, and I'm also the president of the SOS Brigade. My creed is to make the world more exciting!" Suzumiya Haruhi said enthusiastically, shaking her little fists. "...Before entering this space, I was in the SOS Brigade activity room, browsing the internet with Nagato Yuki. Hmm, the rest of the story, Yuki-chan, it's all yours!"
As Suzumiya Haruhi spoke, she casually dragged Nagato Yuki over, wrapping her arms around her neck and resting her head on her shoulder, affectionately rubbing her face against Nagato Yuki's. "Hmm, hmm, Yuki-chan is the smartest!"
—Hey, Haruhi Suzumiya, are you sure you're not a yuri enthusiast? It seems like you're always busy bothering girls?
Also, when did Nagato Yuki become "your" Yuki?
Wang Qiu couldn't help but mentally roll his eyes, inwardly muttering.
However, when faced with Haruhi's intimate harassment, Nagato Yuki merely adjusted her glasses calmly and said with a composed expression.
"...Understood. I will now explain. I am Nagato Yuki, a member of the SOS Brigade and Suzumiya Haruhi's subordinate. This afternoon, during our club activities, I was chatting online with a salesperson from a Tokyo-based e-commerce store about purchasing new electronic products when a strange voice suddenly interrupted: 'Do you want to understand the meaning of life? Do you want to truly... live?'"
At the time, before I could answer, Suzumiya Haruhi, who had been standing behind me, enthusiastically shouted, 'Is this some kind of mysterious event? Will there be time travelers, people from other worlds, superhumans, and aliens joining us?'
The voice hesitated for a moment, then replied, 'Perhaps.'
So, Suzumiya Haruhi excitedly said, 'What are we waiting for? When do we leave?'
After that, we lost consciousness for a brief moment and found ourselves here..."
"...That's exactly how it happened!" Suzumiya Haruhi nodded, then looked at the others. "How did you all get here? By the way, is there anyone here who's a time traveler, from another world, a superhuman, or an alien?"
"...Well... My name is Doraemon. I'm a cat-type robot from the 22nd century, currently living with the Nobita family in Tokyo... As for how I got here, to be honest, I don't remember very well..."
Doraemon sighed, scratching his head and mumbling, "Yesterday evening, I found that another one of my credit cards was maxed out, and I couldn't buy many of the new products I wanted. Feeling down, I decided to indulge in some of my favorite red bean-filled dorayaki and had quite a bit of Wood Pepper Wine... Then, I don't remember anything. Perhaps I played on the computer after getting drunk, or maybe I answered a call..."
—Wood Pepper Wine, a cat's narcotic, comparable to strong alcohol, cigarettes, and opium. Cats who consume it experience the same effect as humans using marijuana.
"...Hmm, is it my turn now? Hello, everyone! My name is Nobita Shinnosuke, I'm five years old, and I'm a student in the Sunflower Class at Futaba Kindergarten in Haruhi City. I have a mom, a dad, and a little dog named Shiro! I love chocolate biscuits and dynamic hamburgers, and my favorite things to do are the 'butt dance,' putting my mom's panties on my head, the 'elephant dance,' imitating the dynamic superhero's laugh, firing dynamic light waves, and rolling around!"
After Doraemon, Nobita Shinnosuke giggled as he stepped up, "Now, let me show you all my butt dance..."
Seeing this little brat spouting all sorts of inappropriate jokes and already taking off his pants, Wang Qiu, feeling exasperated, cleared his throat and stopped him. "...Ahem! The dancing can wait, little Shin, why don't you tell us how you ended up in this world first?"
"...How did I get here? Oh, I remember now! A beautiful older sister in strange clothes was handing out flyers at the entrance of Futaba Kindergarten, saying that if I agreed to participate in some kind of event, I'd get the latest limited edition Dynamic Superhero doll! Look, here it is!"
Nobita tilted his head, thought for a moment, then pulled a Dynamic Superhero plastic figurine from his pants and proudly showed it to everyone. "After getting the freebie, I circled it on the flyer... Then I woke up and found myself on this train... Hey, where exactly are we? I don't think this is a kidnapping, right? We still have a 30-year mortgage to pay, and we can't afford any ransom!"
—Wang Qiu wisely chose to ignore the nonsense that followed.
Sigh, even the traditional method of handing out flyers has been adapted... The main god's recruiting tactics are truly full of variety...
Wang Qiu sighed, then shifted his gaze to the remaining two "ordinary people"— at least they looked like they were more average.
"...Ah, my surname is Zheng, Zheng Shuang. I work for a foreign trade company in the Hong Kong Special Administrative Region. One day while at work, I randomly saw a weird pop-up window on my computer. At first, I thought it was a game for Infinite Horror, but after clicking 'YES,' I ended up here."
The office worker who had just asked for signatures from Doraemon, Suzumiya Haruhi, Nagato Yuki, and Nobita Shinnosuke, now appeared holding a box, and spoke to Wang Qiu. "...By the way, you're really not Zhang Jie, nor some half-immortal half-guide, right?"
"...You've probably been watching Infinite Horror too much!" Wang Qiu rolled his eyes. "...By the way, what's in the box you're holding?"
"...It's a password-protected box containing the T-virus and its antibodies. I found it hidden in a compartment on the train. It's an essential survival and score-boosting item in Resident Evil, and it even earned me 500 reward points!" Zheng Shuang said with a smug grin. "...Too bad the box doesn't have a password, but we have experts here... Nagato, could you give us a hand?"
He casually handed the box to Nagato Yuki.
"...Understood, data processing initiated, retrieving password... Password obtained, opening box..."
With a few quick operations, Nagato Yuki soon opened the box, revealing a row of sealed test tubes containing the T-virus and antibodies. Zheng Shuang carefully examined them, and after getting Wang Qiu's approval, he distributed them to everyone for safekeeping.
Of course, as Doraemon is a non-living entity, there was no need to waste any of the precious serum on him— Nagato Yuki was the only one of the group still considered a biological life form.
"...Um, though I don't really understand what you're all saying, I'll introduce myself anyway! My name is Han Leilei, from Northeast China. I work as an editor at a small publishing house in my county. While on a business trip, I was playing a game on my phone when I accidentally clicked on a pop-up window and ended up here..."
The fashionable young woman who seemed to have never heard of Infinite Horror also introduced herself and then asked a classic question. "...By the way, are we only here in consciousness, like those novels about online games? Does that mean if we finish the game or die in it, our consciousness will return to our bodies?"
"...In my personal opinion, it's probably not like that. In these spaces, we can feel pain,