Getting away from Konoha proper was remarkably easier than escaping from the Konoha Strict Correctional Facility. Sure, one was a prison and the other a village, so on the surface that might make sense, but we're talking a village of ninja here. Konoha was the largest Hidden Village on the continent and while Kumo might field more active duty shinobi, that still left Mizuki's former home with a rather large contingent of capable ninja just roaming throughout the surrounding woodlands, with a not insignificant number of those ninja gunning specifically for me.
What helped us in avoiding recapture after only a few hours of sweet freedom (which is what I imagine has happened to the majority of my fellow inmates by now) was the prison's somewhat remote location away from the ninja capital of the Land of Fire.
Exactly where in said Land of Fire it was located I had no clue and predictably neither did the Legendary Stupid Brothers. Tsubaki was a godsend when I questioned her on it however, proving her worth once again.
"The prison is located north of Konohagakure, which itself is located almost dead center in the Land of Fire, which is surrounded by all the other Great Shinobi Countries. Even further north is the border between the Land of Fire, the Land of Grass and the Land of Waterfalls. Beyond them lies the mountainous region of the Land of Stone." The woman explained as she drew a crude map in the dirt of our little clearing in the woods with a kunai.
"Wait, I thought they were called the Elemental Nations?" I interrupted and Tsubaki blinked at me in surprise.
"No? Why would they? The Moon is not an element. Neither are Hotsprings or Waterfalls." She pointed out and I rubbed the base of my neck with an embarrassed chuckle.
"Right. Makes sense." I said, outwardly calm.
Internally, however…
'Damn you fanon! Damn you straight to heeeelll!'
It was more than frustrating to realize my outsider knowledge of this world couldnt always be trusted. I mean, I knew my recollection wasn't complete in the first place, but now I was probably going to second-guess every bit of trivia I thought I did remember, even when it concerned the fundamentals of this world.
This was probably basic kid stuff to Tsubaki, but I never was a kid in this world and the Legendary Stupid Brothers, for all their ridiculous strength, were barely better than children themselves. Sadly, the hidden locations of future villains was apparently more advanced material and Tsubaki had no idea what I meant when I asked her if she knew the location of Mount Shumisen, the base of operations for Hiruko of the Chimera Technique.
I suppose it made sense the Konoha chūnin hadn't heard of it; what with it being a secret base I doubt Hiruko gets that many visitors. Those that do wander too close would swiftly be turned away by his subordinates at the four gates leading up to the castle. And by 'turned away' I actually mean 'turned into corpses'. Same difference where guys like Hiruko are concerned.
They really take their 'no soliciting' very seriously around here.
So why risk going there, especially considering that hadn't originally been the first step in my plan to rise above canon Mizuki's status as filler fodder? Because I had realized several things when Frog had placed me underneath his hypnosis. Their intent had been to let me recall Mizuki's memories, but it had allowed me clearer access to those of my previous life instead. Which is when I recalled Hiruko and his kekkei genkai-stealing pasty ass.
Kekkei genkai were objectively cool and I totally understood wanting to collect them like they were Pokémon (though literally crucifying your 'donors' went just a tad too far for my tastes). Hell, Hiruko wasn't even the only one with that particular grind mindset, it was part of the reason why he and Orochimaru were buddies in the past.
Not that I thought I'd be able to wrestle the secrets of his most prized technique from him, so implanting multiple bloodlines was a pipe dream for now. But Hiruko could offer me multiple other things, intel first and foremost. I didn't know just how close he and Orochimaru had been, but I was hoping he was at least passingly familiar with his fellow scientist's various projects, especially those that overlapped with his own interests. Hopefully he could point me in the direction of the research station that had developed the animal hybrid power-up that was tattooed on my forearm.
In canon Mizuki knew the secret of unlocking the formula inscribed in my skin and had then stolen the required ingredients from a Nara compound. I however had no idea how to read the strange skull-like tattoo and I definitely didn't fancy breaking into a secure facility run by the smartest clan in Konoha. Hiruko likely did know how to unlock the formula though and I was betting chances were good that he had access to the ingredients himself, or at the very least point me in the direction of people who did.
Hopefully. I remember there being some type of Creature from the Black Lagoon scientist on an island down south somewhere that had perfected his own hybrid animal form, but I had no clue which island or even what the scientist was called.
Having access to my tiger form without having it turn me into a sun-dried mummy was incentive enough to visit Hiruko's castle, considering it could be a powerful trump card in defeating the current wearer of the Infinite Armor, as its chakra-absorbing qualities meant that sheer brute force would be key in his defeat.
However, there was another reason to seek out Hiruko and his special technique. Sure, it became well-known for its ability to absorb kekkai genkai, but on a more base level it was also capable of incorporating foreign DNA material. It was what gave Hiruko an increased base level of speed and strength, even without the special bloodlines. Such minor alterations were much more stable as well, and don't seem to have a hard cap like the kekkei genkai do.
Since both the Vein of Gelel and the Dragon Veins are genetically locked, that meant seeking out Hiruko at the start of my plan could yield incredible benefits in some of the later steps down the line.
The biggest risk in approaching him so early was that I still lacked those power-ups, so I was incredibly weak, though the same could be said for Hiruko as he currently lacked much of the powers he'd absorb later in the show. Not that I was really looking for a fight with the bloodline-obsessed man. I was counting on my own status as one of Orochimaru's agents to, if not get his trust, at least grant me an audience with the man. Should things go south, I'd have the Legendary Stupid Brothers use their extraordinary strength to get Tsubaki and I the hell off that mountaintop and hustle our asses down south to the Land of Rivers.
First order of business though was actually finding said mountain in the first place.
Still, even if we didn't know the exact location of the mystical mountain, we had a heading and that was good enough for now. Better to pick a direction and run rather than sit around and risk recapture. Besides, I remember that the mountain was located on the border between the Land of Stone and the Land of Grass, placing it pretty much dead center in the middle of the continent, a parallel to my own world's mythology apparently. Considering its sheer size (and Grass' relatively small one) that hopefully meant we'd be able to spot the mountain from miles away.
That did leave me with an important question though.
"So, which way do we keep running? Further north to the Land of Waterfalls until we hid the border of Stone, or do we go straight through Grass instead?"
Mizuki's fiancée tapped the tip of the kunai against her lips in thought, quickly catching on to my own considerations.
"Taki is an ally of Konoha. So it should be safe to cross. Or relatively safe, at least. We have no conflicts with Grass, but without an official mission slip, they likely won't look kindly on us taking a shortcut through their country."
"Counterpoint, the same could be said of Taki nin. Konoha's allied with them after all, they might already be aware of our status as fugitives." I point out darkly, startling Tsubaki.
"Oh… right, I hadn't considered that yet." She says in a small voice, eyes distant, clearly needing some time to adjust to her new status as an outlaw.
A twinge of guilt pulls at my heartstrings and I clear my throat, trying to come up with something uplifting to say.
"Well, at least the top brass seemed to be coming around, slowly. Could be that they put an 'Alive Only' bounty on our heads. Meaning we'll just get recaptured instead of… you know… immediately executed. So… that's comforting, at least." I trail off, Tsubaki's eyes wide.
"R-right. Comforting." She says somewhat hollowly.
Conversation that night didn't really pick up again after that. Thankfully, it wasn't if we had much time for conversation anyways. After catching some much needed shut-eye of just a few hours at most, we picked up camp (which was easy to do, considering we didn't really have any supplies and hadn't even dared to light a fire) and we were off again.
I hadn't yet fully settled on whether to cut through Grass or Waterfall yet, but for now both nations were to the north of us, so that's where we shot off to, using the sun to keep our course as we flitted from branch to branch (or pushing off from tree trunk to tree trunk in the case of our two large companions).
Two reasons spurred me to such haste: the idea of either ANBU or the Interception Division being hot on my trail, Izumo and Kotetsu especially considering how Tsubaki and I had swiftly taken them out, injuring both their heads and (more importantly) their pride. Tiger too had seemed scarily competent, though how that translated to tracking skills I had no idea.
I know on a meta level ANBU had taken the role of fodder to establish the real threats in the setting, but not for a second would I allow myself to forget I was nowhere near any of those threats either, which meant just about any ANBU could totally stomp my ass without breaking a sweat behind their porcelain masks.
The second threat might seem less serious, but was definitely more immediate.
"Hey, Boss. When are we going to eat? I'm hungry."
"Yeah, me too!"
The bellies of the Legendary Stupid Brothers made themselves known with deep, rumbling growls, which was only matched by the thunderous expressions on their rotund faces.
'Right… these guys literally killed their own comrades over a dinner dispute. If they get too hungry… I mean, I haven't found any definitive proof that they are cannibals… but at the same time, I also haven't found any definitive proof that they aren't… who knows what they'll resort to once starvation truly sets in?'
I mean, even regular humans in my home world had resorted to such drastic measures when the need became too high. Seeing the barely contained malevolence in those beady little eyes set in too-large faces made me think that it wouldn't take a crash in the frozen peaks of the Andes for them to resort to similar measures.
Sure, their banter with each other was amusing, but I couldn't let myself forget that these were hardened mass murderers and locked up on a volcanic island with good reason.
"We're heading to where the food is right now, Fujin, Raijin. It'll just take us a bit to get there, but that's a good thing!"
The elder brother, Fujin scrunched his monobrow.
"Waiting for food is a good thing?"
"Yes! The longer you wait, the tastier it becomes!"
"But… all food is tasty?" the younger brother, Raijin piped up, equally confused.
"True. And now it will be even tastier!"
"Wow… food that's even tastier than food… how long will we have to wait until it becomes even tastier?" Fujin asked.
"Uhm… it differs from person to person-"
"How long for our persons?" Raijin interrupted.
"Until your- I mean, until my belly is growling. You guys already know I know food, it's why I arranged your bonus meals back at the prison. So better to listen to my belly instead of your own right?"
For a second, the two giant brothers glanced at each other, to their enormous guts and back to each other again. Then Fujin shrugged his massive shoulders and shot me a smile that displayed far too many teeth for my liking.
"Sure, Boss. We'll trust your belly. Hope it starts rumbling soon."
"Right. I'll let you know when it does."
"Be sure that you do." Fujin shot back, tone darker, smile still in place but far more sinister now.
"R-right… will do."
Seeing my predicament, Tsubaki came through once again, hopping over to a branch closer to me as we shot through the trees in sync.
"I don't know of any large towns in the immediate area off the top of my head, but there should be some major roads not far from here, connecting Konohagakure to the other countries. Waterfall especially."
"Could be trouble. Roads mean traffic and traffic means we could get spotted." I caution, Tsubaki nodding.
"Yes, but moving closer should also allow us to pick up signs of civilization. There should be at least several homesteads or small villages around, hamlets that are too small to have official names or be included in any map. We might even come across a temple." She argued back and I weighed the options in my mind.
However, it wasn't my mind that eventually called the shot, but two large stomachs following close behind, letting out another thunderous rumbling.
"Right, heading to civilization ASAP." I confirmed.
I found the threat of discovery paled in comparison to the threat of dismemberment.
//
"So that's Iwakura Toji, with an 'i'… yes, that's right. Yes, head south down this road and you'll end up at the gates of Konohagakure in, about three days travel or so. Perhaps a bit more, considering you're travelling at slower speeds than ninja. Don't worry about getting stopped at the gate, just wave this letter at the guards, if one of them has an emo haircut and a beanie and the other has spiky hair and a bandage over his nose, then that's just Izumo and Kotetsu. They'll take this letter and IOU and Toji-san will pay you back in full, no problem. Konoha shinobi's honor." I said with a large beaming smile to the somewhat despondent looking village leader.
A rather understandable expression, considering the large storehouse in his small hamlet now only contained several sad empty burlap sacks and smashed crates, their entire winter provisions gone inside the bottomless bellies of my two bodyguards, who were stretched lazily at the ramshackle building's side with pleased grins and drowsy eyes.
"Hey, Big Bro! The Boss was right, this was super tasty! I couldn't get enough!"
"Yeah Big Bro, waiting does make food tastier. We should listen to the Boss' belly more often!"
While I felt for the village, I valued the loyalty of the Legendary Brothers more, so I just clasped my hands and performed a polite bow before signaling my team to head out once again. We came across the outlying fields of this little farming village not long after my discussion with Tsubaki, our strange group heading off to where the woods seemed thinner in the hopes of coming across a road.
What we came across instead was a very startled sheep farmer, who at the intimidating glares of Fujin and Raijin took us to the small village that sat on the edge of the large forest, nestled in the crook of a nearby winding river.
Besides feeding the brothers unending appetite (for now, at least), the little hamlet was also a valuable source of intel.
"Other villages? I mean, there's several families livin' beyond that there yonder hill, but other than that, we don't get much folk 'round these parts, save for the Daimyo's tax collector. He don't like comin' out this way tho, has to leave the main road leading to Taki about, oh, twenty, thirty miles back? Complains 'bout dust on his robes. Crazy fellers, them Imperial folk, complainin' 'bout dust. The hell he thinks roads are made of anyways?" the village elder had explained when he came out to meet my little party, whistling through the one remaining tooth that was hanging on for dear life.
Don't know why he sounded like your stereotypical Texan rancher, must be Mizuki's ears being accustomed to 'city folk' speech I guess.
The old geezer looked suspiciously from the letter in his hand to me and then to his wrecked barn.
"And this Toji fella, he's gonna pay back all the stuff your boys gobbled up? Just like that?" he glanced back at the paper as some of the village people came out of their own little huts and homes, glancing at the Legendary Brothers in a mixture of disgusted awe.
Thankfully they didn't raise much of a fuss when we rolled up to the small hamlet. My own innate charisma combined with the Brother's innate scariness probably accounted for some of that, but I think Tsubaki's gentle demeanor went a long way in setting the little farmer's community at ease.
While no combat medic, Tsubaki was at least somewhat knowledgeable in medicine, which, it being ninja medicine, was worlds ahead of what these poor civilians had access to. Cuts and scrapes were ever present in farming communities and were easily handled by a gently smiling Tsubaki, even without access to a proper med kit. Apparently, this small act of kindness was enough for the villagers to have her meet one of the young women of their little community who was getting further along in her pregnancy. Not that there had been any compilations, but births were always risky out here in remote places such as this, so having a second opinion from a mercenary wizard probably did a lot to put their minds at ease.
Even when the Brothers began putting a serious dent in their food stores, we weren't run out of the village, so to thank the elder I had written him an IOU in my former warden's name. Not that the old man seemed to fully grasp the concept of trading paper for goods yet.
"But this is just some scribbles…"
"Scribbles that say you are entitled to compensation."
"Why should he listen to what scribbles tell him?"
"Because… uhm, it's kinda like money? In that there's an amount written on a piece of paper and then a store or a bank is obligated to hand you the amount that's worth."
"… you fellers have money that's made outta paper?"
We beat a hurried retreat not long after, considering I didn't fully trust myself to explain ninja economics (especially since I barely grasped regular economics as it was) and based on the elder's comments the next leg of our journey was set.
Again, Tsubaki and I flit through tree tops in parallel, the satisfied Brothers slightly behind and further below. Glancing at Mizuki's fiancée, I voiced my decision.
"We go further north, skirt around Grass through Waterfall until we hit the northern border with Stone. Then we fall back a bit and cut westward through Grass, avoiding the border with Stone just in case either side is patrolling it, until we hit the foothills of Mount Shumisen. It will add a few days of travel to our journey, but this route keeps us in friendly territory the longest and according to the village elder, this area is sparsely populated to the point I'm not too worried about running into either Konoha or Taki nin on our trek to the border."
Tsubaki nods, but judging from her expression isn't yet fully convinced.
"What if we do run into Konoha nin? Or Taki nin? We're fugitives, but they're not our enemy. Right, Mizuki?"
For a moment, a thick silence falls between us as we shoot from tree to tree.
"I'll be as reasonable as I can be in such a situation, Tsubaki-san. Hopefully if we meet a Taki nin, I'll be able to bluff my way out. It's only been a day and a half since we escaped and I doubt any of the other prisoners came out this way as well, so there's not much reason for Konoha to alert the Waterfall border patrols. Hell, they might even choose to keep the entire breakout a secret in order to save face, so there's a good chance that Taki is completely unaware of our escape. We'll just be allies taking a short-cut through their land on a mission to Stone or something."
"And if we meet a fellow Konoha shinobi? Your… betrayal quickly became infamous, most of our comrades will know something's up." Tsubaki pressed.
"We'll just Henge into a pair of unknown civilians and pray they don't have a Hyuuga on their roster." I reply simply.
"I don't think Fujin and Raijin know the Henge, Mizuki." Tsubaki pointed out and I glanced back over my shoulder at where the Legendary Stupid Brothers were barreling through the woods without a care in the world.
"Hey Big Bro! Why doesn't chicken have a "meat name", like cattle have beef and pigs have pork?"
"Foolish Little Bro! Chicken can be called poultry. It comes from the word "polt," which is similar to "pelt," but for feathers instead of fur. You see, chickens used to be hunted for their polts, until we domesticated them. After that, we hunted ducks, geese, and fowl for their polts, and we stopped calling chicken poultry."
"Oh Big Bro, you're so smart!"
"Hahaha! Of course I am!"
"Yeah… something tells me those two aren't experts in ninjutsu… or even capable…" I concede, turning back to face Tsubaki with a small shrug.
"We could put a henge on ourselves, make us appear like prison guards escorting two dangerous prisoners?"
"Escorting them away from prison?"
"Eh, we could make it work, I think. We'll just claim that we extradited them to an outside prison. Somewhere in the Land of Stone, make our problems theirs. That would please any Konoha nin's sensibilities."
"A prison in the Land of Stone? Why would they fall for that?"
"Tell me, Tsubaki. Have you ever been in an Iwa prison?"
"… what?"
//
And so we kept dashing through the woodlands that covered the northern part of the Land of Fire in a thick blanket of green. Somewhat ironically, considering its name, though as Tsubaki told it, it used to be much more inhospitable way back in ancient times, truly earning the name before the God of Shinobi, Hashirama Senju covered in luscious green in order to create a home for his new people.
Apparently the active caldera that housed my former prison was something of a relic of those bygone days before the First Hokage's little landscaping project. Occasionally the woods thinned out to give way to vast fields and the occasional quilted look of connected farmlands, but with the speeds we were travelling at, I decided not to harass any further villagers. I wanted to hit the border with Waterfall as soon as possible, where I hoped we'd be able to live off the land, at least long enough to satisfy the Brothers' needs for a bit.
To both my relief and surprise, we actually made it to Waterfall without any further issues, seeing neither hide nor hair of any pursuing Konoha shinobi, hitting the dense treeline a couple dozen miles to the east of where the Land of Fire bordered the Land of Grass.
Of course, it was almost immediately afterwards that my earlier words were put to the test.
A twinge of danger, like a spark of electricity dancing across the nape of my neck, had me snap out an arm in front of Tsubaki, halting her in her steps while below the Brothers skidded to a messy stop, reflexes faster than their size would suggest. Not even a second later, a brace of shuriken embedded themselves in the branch that Tsubaki and I would've leapt to. Instead we split up, alighting on a higher branch as we scan our surroundings.
"Ho! Who goes there in such a hurry!" the call came a bit later, the voice echoing oddly somewhere in front of us, clearly being projected.
Tusbaki shot me a concerned look as I slowly straightened from my crouch, eyes scanning the surrounding tree tops.
"Ho there! Who goes there throwing shuriken at random passerby's?" I called back instead.
That got me a laugh that rang out beyond the tree trunks.
"Trust me, I don't make it a habit of attacking random passerby's at all! But then again, you hardly qualify, don't you?" The voice trails off and this time my danger senses kick in a fraction too late, a kunai thunking dully into the bark behind me, burying itself all the way up to its hilt.
A trickle of warmth seeping from my cheek shows I tilted my head just a tad too late. Or just in time, considering that'd split my skull like an overripe watermelon with ease.
"Main road's about twenty miles west of here. So I ask again, who are you and what is your business in the Land of Waterfalls? I see no headbands. Thieves then, or outlaws perhaps?" the unseen voice pressed.
"We have no business in the Land of Waterfalls, our business lies beyond your borders!"
"Then why travel here?"
"We hail from Konoha, we hoped to find hospitable passage through your lands!"
"Konoha, eh? Can't say that really works in your favour, stranger. I hold no love for those tree huggers." The voice responded with a dark chuckle.
'Well, that's rich coming from a guy literally hiding in the leaves right now. Konoha should sue your ass for copyright infringement.'
"Are you no ally to them then?" I try carefully, startled when a figure suddenly appears mere meters away from me, crouched low on an extended tree branch.
Even hunched over it's clear he's tall and lean, with a good deal of muscle on him. A goatee covers his chin and his eyes are darkly outlined. His most striking feature however is his long spikey hair that's held back by a tan-yellow bandana.
'Wait, why do you look familiar?'
"You could say something like that. Your name, cagey stranger. I'd know just who I'm dealing with before I bury them underneath the tree roots of my rightful home. It's a manner of professional pride, you see." The man said, sinister smile still on his face as he locked dark eyes with me.
"Of course. Mizuki. Oniyuri Mizuki. Might I have your name as well, stranger? Considering we're exchanging professional pleasantries anyway?" I try to stall, back flat against the tree behind me, Tsubaki likewise utterly still in her own tree, the sheer threatening aura of the man in front of us giving us pause.
Despite being outnumbered, I know, absolutely, definitely know that the man in front of us will kill us both without even breaking a sweat. Still, for now my little comment has bought us some time at least as the large Taki nin lets out a barking laugh, straightening from his crouch, posture at ease.
"You know what, just for laughs, sure."
Then he juts out a thumb at his chest, grin widening, eyes glittering with the promise of violence.
"Name's Suien. Former tutor to Takigakure's Village Head. Future ruler of Takigakure itself. Soon-to-be killer of one Oniyuri Mizuki." He trails off with a dark chuckle.
"That about settles your curiosity?" he mockingly asks and all I can do is sweatdrop as the other filler villain reveals his identity.
'Ah… crap.'
Fun Fact: Literally translated, the prison warden's name Iwakura Toji can mean Rock Storehouse Administrator. However, depending on how you interpret the kanji, it can also mean lavatory. It seemed fitting for a prison warden. The Rock Storehouse bit, not the lavatory bit. Though I guess the inmates might disagree.