I narrow my eyes. "What do you want, Sokka?"
"It was your first time in a fight-"
"Not true."
...
"Fine, then your first time in a fight of that scale with stakes that high and your mission objective was to neutralise Zhao. You couldn't have known that the Fire Nation soldiers wouldn't stop with his death. And as for Yue… no one thought he would even have knowledge of the Spirit Oasis, no less tell someone else about it. So, I guess what I'm saying is that both aren't your fault. You're not responsible," he pokes a bony finger to my chest.
I grit my teeth. But I am. I was. I should have made sure the Oasis was protected, not just the city at large. I should not have underestimated Zhao, or his soldiers.
"I suppose, then, that we all have burdens to bear that aren't our own."
"What do you mean?" Sokka questions.
"Yue. It was her choice. You can't protect people from themselves, Sokka. We make choices that are our own all the time. And Yue… she knew what she was doing. She knew what she was doing," my voice goes kind of high and hoarse at the same time. So that's all I say. I ignore the worried face Sokka makes.
With that, I move to catch up with the nomads who've wandered past us.
Fucking hell. What does he know?
… more than I give him credit for, obviously.
He hastens his steps, but says nothing. Shoulder to shoulder, grieving like emotionally repressed idiots.
"We should find an earthbender when we reach the city to look for Katara and Aang," I make a peace offering. Voice almost normal.
"Yeah," he nods, and some tension bleeds from his shoulders. For all that the siblings bicker, Sokka sure does have a need for things to be alright. Understandable, really. Makes confrontations hard, though. Makes living in a war hard. But maybe that's how we find the need to make things better.
"I've never met an earthbender aside from the ones in General Fong's base," I comment. "I wonder what it'd be like to spar one."
Sokka rolls his eyes. "You benders and your sparring. The world would be a quieter place if everyone was normal and sensible!"
"Like you?" and the tone is so mocking that he stops to object, while I continue, "I suppose there'd be more theatre. Comedy clubs, that sort of thing."
"Comedy clubs?" his anger is set aside for curiosity. Sokka, in a nutshell.
"Yeah. You know, for people who earn their livelihood by making others laugh. Like court jesters, only for everyone."
"You think those things exist?"
"Maybe in Ba Sing Se. Not sure. If not, when all this is over, you could start one," I say, and can't resist the temptation to add, "Not sure if anyone would come, though."
Outraged, he attempts to put me in a headlock. He's not as tall, and hasn't had to wrestle with Hahn since his early pubescent days. "I'd come," I say lowly, when he taps out. "If only to laugh at you."
...
When we finally find a way out of the caves, Aang and Katara are already there. So that makes the plan to find an earthbender who can help us find them unnecessary.
"Ha! The journey was long and annoying, but now you get to see what it's really about – the destination," Sokka marches to the edge of the cliff facing the city of Omashu after hugging the nomads good-bye. I take care to check for my money pouch after Shuika's clever fingers linger a moment too long.
"I present to you the Earth Kingdom city of O… Oh no."
Above the front gate of the city hangs a red banner. Thick ropes of smoke rise into the sky. The Fire Nation has already taken the city of Omashu.
Aang is glum. Understandable. There isn't much we can do for that, though. " I can't believe it. I know the War has spread far," he turns toward us sadly, "but Omashu always seemed ... untouchable."
Which might be true. Until the Fire Nation launched the recent large-scale attack, the North Pole seemed like an easily defendable bastion against the Fire Nation. Only difference was that we had the Avatar and not an insane ruler. And, I suppose, the city would have been melted to the point of no return instead of occupied. The waterbenders would have been… purged, the population closely monitored somewhere as workers with no chance of resistance unless we had all fled in time.
"Up until now, it was. Now Ba Sing Se is the only Earth Kingdom stronghold left," Sokka agrees. He seems indifferent to what this potentially means for Aang. Bumi is his only friend from before he was encased in ice, except for Appa.
Katara is the same. I suppose that I am the only one who could even remotely emphasise with what Aang feels. If I had only one friend from my old life, one person who knows what it was like, I wouldn't wake up after some afternoon naps wondering if the thirty years I remember aren't just fanciful fantasy constructed by a child with overactive imagination. To have someone who understands…
"This is horrible, but we have to move on."
That's not going to fly. "No. I'm going to find Bumi."
"Aang, stop. We don't even know if Bumi's still-" Sokka cuts himself off from finishing his sentence.
"In the city. But there is really no reason not to search for a friend like he seems to be one," I interject before the siblings can alienate the Avatar. Aang shoots me a grateful look. Sokka looks like he wants to both thank me for ending his sentence and throttle me for going along with Aang's desire. Katara just frowns at me disapprovingly like she always does.
"It's useful if we know what people live like under Fire Nation regime," I add, and Sokka will accept it as tactically sound. Katara… "And maybe they could use a little help."
We make for the city under a widespread coat of mist, so as not to seem inconspicuous in a dense cloud making its way to the under bowels of the city. Aang leads us to a large round pipe with a closed off end that I have my suspicions about.
"A secret passage?" Sokka asks, "Why didn't we use this last time?"
Aang breaks open the entrance. Urgh. Sewer. "I think I'll just sit this one out," I say and take Aang's place behind Appa's head.
"Wouldn't want Appa to get lonely," Aang agrees.
Katara sneers at me, and follows him while Sokka throws me a look that's probably supposed to be knowing, but comes off as uncertain. I wave them away.
"Yip yip!" I always wanted to say that. Appa and I make for the canyon that I think is most probable for Aang and the resistance to take cover in. I layer the area with a thick fog and find a nice niche without other inhabitants for Appa to hide in. I give him some feed and settle in to think about what my plans are.
With Fong's map, I trace out a plausible route to Ba Sing Se. With Omashu a Fire Nation city until the solar eclipse, it is the only city I could find that leads to a spy network among the Fire Nation citizens. Especially with the Dai Li in cahoots with Azula.
When did that happen anyway? Is there a chance to infiltrate? The only person I specifically remember being brainwashed is that guy with the hook-swords and wheat sticking from his mouth. I… might have to provoke people into acting out. And follow them. And be better than the Dai Li at sneaking around.
I get the booze from Appa's saddle.
So maybe getting the White Lotus involved early might just be the key. I know all the over sixty-year-olds are members. All the white-haired Masters. And Sokka's sword master.
So, maybe not all of the old men. I'd feel too comfortable around people older than me who don't treat me like I'm somehow reliable. That was so disconcerting after the siege. Apparently, even in Zuko's white outfit with the hood on people recognised me. I wasn't even behaving much like my usual self during the fighting and planning and clean-up.
I think, anonymity will do me some good. It's neat that even someone who knew Momo's name didn't know mine. That does help. A little.
At some point, I get drunk enough to brush Appa's teeth. Which is oddly satisfying. But also disgusting. I'm still not sure how to feel about it.
When the moon is high up in the sky, I begin to hum a few of my more favourite songs that I can mostly only remember the chorus to. Which makes me sad. Which irritates me. To which I can only laugh at myself. This is like puberty in one night. Only not so bad. But.
Appa has soft fur.
I'm going to miss that. And I only had it for about a week. Well, better to leave before it really hurts. They're fun, but. I need to be by myself. Or do something that doesn't require me to be nice, and cooperative all the time.
All this aggression and it has nowhere to go.
...
Don't forget to throw some power stones :)
...
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