The air in the council hall was so thick and you could almost smell the rivalry emanating from each member present. Mother's, however, seemed to be in abundance compared to the others and everyone else could feel it. I never knew a queen could be so intimidating until I attended council meetings with my mother.
She threw me a death stare from across the hall, visibly expressing her disappointment and disgust. If only she'd let me explain that it wasn't my fault. Who was I kidding? I couldn't possibly blame a book! How ridiculous would that sound? A book was my reason for missing the council meeting? No.. I needed a better excuse, but knowing Mother, she wouldn't buy it.
I slowly made my way into the hall and sat on my designated chair. The same chair which had always been comfortable for me suddenly felt like sitting on an ant-infested surface, and the uneasy feeling in my stomach returned. I couldn't dare to look at the person sitting right next to me and I was too embarrassed to look up either, but I knew sooner or later Mother would tell me to…
"Sit straight, Elise." Mother said as if reading my mind.
"Stand up, Elise." She ordered and I stood to my feet immediately.
"And now sit down." She said gently as if teaching a puppy.
"Stand up, Elise." She fired. Her voice jolted everyone in the hall
"Sit back down." She said again gently. Then almost immediately, she ordered me to stand again.
She kept ordering me to repeat the sit-stand movement for what seemed to be like an eternity. My legs had begun to ache and it didn't help that I had heels on. My feet became sore from the exercise turn punishment that Mother was meting out to me. I looked up and around the hall, my eyes now welling with tears and hoping that someone would take pity on me and beg the queen to stop but no one did. Everyone feared the queen and no one had so much as tried to oppose her. I looked at Father with the hopes that he would say, but the betraying look in his eyes told me it was impossible. I silently prayed that Mother would have mercy on me herself.
"Elise?" She called.
"Yes…your majesty?" My voice broke, I was already in tears.
"You will remain on your feet till the meeting is concluded, is that clear?" Her tone was flat and there was no remorse in her voice.
"Is that clear?" She repeated.
"Yes ma'am" I answered casually.
"Good. Now, where are your weekly reports?" Mother asked.
Oh no! I didn't bring my reports with me because I got carried away in Mother's room and I couldn't return to my quarters to gather my reports.
"Your majesty, if you would please permit me to fetch them from my quarters…"
"No." Mother cut me off, her tone still flat as before.
"Do you consider the affairs of the senate a joke, Elise?" She asked.
"No, your majesty, I…"
"…did not ask you to speak." She shot me a death glare. This was the first time she'd shown multiple emotions in one day.
"First you're late to the meeting, then you come in here without giving courtesy to anyone in attendance and now you left your weekly report in your room?"
"The people present in this room, if they had been as careless and ignorant as you are now, do you think, dear princess, that we would've built this fine empire you so carefreely live in today?" She said raising her voice, her tone rising with each word she uttered.
I looked at everyone present. They all tried to mask their displeasure but the air in the room already bore word of it. I saw the governors of both Scye and Omir express their frustrations with low grunts and an almost unnoticeable shake of their heads while whispering to themselves. I instantly knew they were talking about me. The Scye people were mostly distributors of food; even though I had never once seen them grow it. It was safe to say they were importing food but no one knew where. Or maybe, I didn't know where. The Omir people, on the other hand was home to our finest technologists. Every structure in the kingdom was all thanks to their brilliance.
And as for Oscic, it was our duty to oversee the development of the kingdom. We took records of everything that happened in each city and ensured that its various citizens as well as the city's wellbeing were thriving. A simple shift in the balance would cause the kingdom to come to ruins. So, it was no surprise that Mother was very upset with me.
She never stopped telling me how one day, I would be the one to oversee everything that happened in the kingdom and here I was slacking off. I started to think I deserved more that Mother's simple sit-stand punishment and instead, she should've ordered me to be whipped for disgracing her in front of these fat, gossiping governors. I knew how much she disliked them but had to tolerate them for the good of our kingdom, and now I let her and father down in front of them. I balled my fists and hung my head lower, not caring what Mother would say or do. I'd embarrassed her too much to even hold my head high and pretend nothing happened.
"The meeting is over." Mother announced.
She had that same expressionless look. Almost as if nothing had happened. She sent me to my room and asked father to stay back with her for a private discussion. I watched the other two leave before giving my courtesy and closing the doors behind me. After making sure the governors had left, I sighed and leaned on the hall doors and I overheard Mother and Father in what sounded like a heated argument. I was wrong to have been eavesdropping, but the argument was so intense and I had a feeling it was about me.
"Oh and what would you know, Basil? You treat her like an egg and dote on her all day long. You don't correct her when she does something even as bad as disgracing you in front of your council members!" I heard mother say.
"She's still a child. It's all still too much for her to handle" My father defended.
"That is exactly your problem. You see nothing wrong with the girl and her behavior! She can't walk proper, can't sit proper, and she shows no sign of being the future heiress to your kingdom that you fought tirelessly to protect"
"And then I'm the bad parent for wanting to bring out the best in her?" She continued to say.
"You're well aware of everything we had to go through to be where we are now! And let me hold your hand when I say this that if that girl successfully pulls down this kingdom, then it will be on your head and not mine."
"Elaine…listen"
"No, you listen! If you want to maintain your good record as ruler then I suggest you do your fatherly duties very diligently"
"This child is mine as much as she is yours, Elaine. Don't push her too much." Father begged.
"Then take action!" Mother said, raising her voice.
"Take action or let me handle it how I see fit." She said gently.
"You're dismissed." Father said.
I ran past the hall into my room as soon as I heard Mother's footsteps approaching the door. I didn't want to upset either of them if I were to be caught eavesdropping. Mother said it wasn't ladylike to act in such a manner. I closed the doors behind me and sat on the floor crying. Mother and Father were both arguing and it was because of silly little me. I began to wonder if things would've been different had I been born as a boy, or if they would stay the same. I buried my face in my palms and sat there crying all evening.