Peaceful days only continued for a few days before I was once again summoned by Father. An unex—well, very expected—event was taking place: Muspelheim was rebelling, just like they did every few centuries or so. They were annoying pests, who just multiplied like they had no other stuff to do, and once they had enough population, they would try to overthrow Asgard...
They always failed, but I don't know what gave them the confidence to do it again and again. I once even asked Father why don't we kill a lot of them, then just use some freezing spells over Muspelheim to curb their population growth and keep those pests in line, but Father started ranting something about the Nine Realms being different from the outer universe and stuff.
Anyways, my proposal was rejected, and here we are—going to fight them again. And this time, they are acting in full form. Maybe even Father would have to act, considering Surtr was leading his forces himself. Yes, the same Surtr who effed Asgard during Ragnarök, and yes, he was exactly in that form right now—his eternal flame hadn't been taken by Asgard yet.
Normally, this would have been a severe issue, and Odin would have rushed at first glance. But hey, I am strong enough to deal with it now, Odin knows it, and of course I can't enjoy my life here. He went like, "Go, deal with him, show them the might of Asgard, blah blah blah..." So here I was, leading a large army towards Muspelheim.
But not everything was bad—I had taken everyone along with me. Well, by everyone, I mean Freyja, Brynhild, Sersi, and Thena. Of course, there were the rest of the Valkyries too, but with these four present, they probably won't get the opportunity to sleep with me.
Oh, and did I mention Hela? She was here too—something about finding those Fire Giants annoying and her being angry and wanting to vent. I did not go into the exact details of her anger. Maybe she was on her periods, and it definitely wasn't my fault she was angry, believe me...
Yes, goddesses get periods too in case you are wondering. No one is safe from that shit.
Even I, the greatest god here in Asgard, still need to take care of that cycle—taking not one, but two... Freyja and Hela both. As for the rest, they were quite good actually, knew how to control themselves, not daring to go ballistic on me. Only these two had no reservations and were completely after my ass.
"Kinda hot in here, isn't it?" I asked the women behind. We were in Muspelheim, and it was a warm sunny day—nah, just kidding, it was literally hell.
"Absolutely!! Just use those mass destruction spells of yours quickly so that we can go away from here quickly, I absolutely hate it here." A frantic Freyja, the fake goddess who couldn't even manage Egyptian heat—of course Muspelheim was unbearable for her.
"Now now, Muspelheim is a part of the Nine Realms. Father said we absolutely can't destroy it... Anyways, since it's hot, I would cool it a bit." I shrugged, and—
COOLDOWN!
And a super-tier spell, which would make Aokiji's Ice Age feel like the cold wind you receive when opening a freezer, erupted. Now believe me when I am saying this: I absolutely used this spell because the Aesir soldiers and us were feeling uncomfortable from the heat. I had no other motives.
As for the downfall of Muspelheim's global warming, I would take a special thank-you letter about it from Surtr later when the war is over. As for the frozen wonderland about the size of Russia in front of us, which had accidentally frozen several Fire Giants?
We were in a war. I thought ice would do extra damage, you know—attribute restraint and shit? As for implementing my plan about freezing a large part of Muspelheim to control Fire Giant numbers? Absolutely not. Daddy dearest forbade it.
"Tchh... Showoff." Hela grumbled.
"Well, that was overkill... Anyways, the weather is better now at the very least." And Freyja continued—at least she sees the brighter parts, unlike a certain useless sister of mine, who is out there competing about uselessness with Aqua.
"Well, it will remain cool for a while now..." I mumbled, then shouted, "Establish a temporary camp, rest, and prepare for battle! We march ahead in two days. This area has been cleared by my spell." With that, all that was left was to lead an army, beat the shit out of Surtr, and return.
And so, we marched through the frozen realms of Muspelheim—thanks to yours truly—and reached the lair of Surtr, the big-ass Fire Giant.
"Magnar, Son of Odin... So you were the one who cast that spell... Is Odin not afraid of losing his heir?" came a grumbling sound, which was purely noisy. This was Surtr, who clearly did not possess outstanding communication skills. Therefore, being the kind God I am, I gave him a crash course.
"Surtr... Son of a bitch." Credit goes to Thor. Sadly, he's not born yet, therefore, don't mind it little bro. "And Odin losing an heir? Looking at that pathetic weak ass of yours, what we should be questioning is whether I would even lose a hair beating you." And his ass started burning—well, it was already burnt, but now it was even brighter.
"Surtr!! Look!! Your arse!! It's on fire, it's burning!" I continued with a laugh, and finally, Surtr couldn't take it anymore and swung that big sword of his.
I raised my spear, Lifhrensir, and blocked it—with ease. Don't look at Surtr's massive size; I am the God of Life, the ultimate biological lifeform. My physical strength surpasses Surtr's. Then with a swing, I threw his sword back, which made Surtr stumble a few steps.
I stretched my body a bit—mostly to mock him, showing how easy it was for me to fight him—then I jumped, high enough to reach above his head, and delivered a punch straight to his helm. Surtr was lifted off the ground from the force and fell backwards, crushing a large number of Flame Giants.
I then jumped on top of his chest and delivered a few more punches, sinking him within the ground.
SEAL!
A simple spell, but enough to seal Surtr. He won't be waking up soon. Now comes the next task.
'Raph, start research on his Eternal Flame, we are taking that back to Asgard.'
[Yes Master. Should I help in the extraction too?]
'Hmmm... I was going to do it on my own... but since you are offering so kindly, why not?'
[Well, you are one lazy mf, Master~]
'Doesn't matter if I'm being lazy, I've got you to cover my ass if things go south.'
[Of course you do.] came a chuckling voice.
So, after that, Raph sealed the Eternal Flame, and we returned back to Asgard. As for Surtr? Legends say he's still there, on Muspelheim, lying down in the defeated Katakuri pose.
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A request to all of you, please try my Naruto: Adaptability novel, I am re-uploading it, so please drop reviews on the work.