"Hey, Kumi-chan! Thanks for waiting for me today, you're the best. This is Kiyomi. Do you know him?"
"I know of him. He's the one who tends to be on his own the majority of the time, right?"
"That's right! He's a loner, but he has a charisma that draws you into him. I ran into him earlier at the bleachers, but he had something troubling his mind."
"Troubling his mind?"
"Yeah, he didn't say much when I asked what bothered him. Honestly, I couldn't help him much, at least, I don't think I did. I told him some embarrassing things about myself. You know, to butter him up."
"Is that so? I didn't expect Kiyomi to be the type to open up with others. He looks exhausted, though. Like he's been through some real shit. Kiyomi, are you okay?"
"He is! He's just, like you said, too exhausted to say anything else. He did, however, tell me what was on his mind."
"Really? Well, what's on his mind then?"
"Before we get to that, would you mind if we have a conversation?"
"A conversation? About what? What do you have in mind?"
"Do you remember when we first met? You flat-out ignored me when I approached you and tried to have a chat. I never told you this, but I was so incredibly hurt. You were the first person who ever rejected me. Other than when you used to, I'd never been rejected. Whenever I needed something from someone, they would give it to me if I just asked. Whether it be companionship or some material object. Sometimes, I don't need to ask. They'd just give me what I want. They'd just give me what they think I want.
"But whenever I went up to you, you'd ignore me. I used to get angry and think things like, 'What's this girl's problem? Can't she tell I just want to be her friend?'
"Maybe that's why you rejected me. You were able to see through my facade, unlike everyone else. You knew that I didn't want to become friends with you; I wanted to be your friend. Those two things may sound the same, but they're not. They're incredibly different.
"Over time, rejection after rejection, I started to hate you. Why won't she let me in already? Will she push me away forever? I thought to myself. But, no matter how many times you rejected me, I still chose to try to befriend you. I didn't know what it was exactly that made me so drawn to you, but I think I do now:
"You were a challenge. A challenge that I must overcome. That's all you were to me at the time. I didn't see you as a person. You weren't a person to me. I knew that you were a human, just like me. But I never once considered you as a person. And that's the same for everyone else. Other people weren't other people. All they were were beings that just so happened to be the same type of species as I was. Even worse than that, they were also tools to me. When I needed something, they'd come running with open hands to help me.
"I didn't earn any of their respect. I'm certain the only reason they were so eager to aid me was because of my attractiveness. People tend to go out of their way to do things for those they deem to be attractive. All I've done is follow what others want me to be: the person with the top grades in school, the person who has the brightest future waiting for them, the person who knows what she wants in life and how to obtain it. But in reality, I don't know anything. I'm unsure whether my actions are made by me or if I'm just blindly following fate.
"I knew how to make people like me and give me what they want: I'd take advantage of how people perceived me. If they thought I was the most beautiful girl in the world, then I was the most beautiful girl in the world. If I were the smartest person in the world, then I was the smartest person in the world.
"Who I was, who I am, who I'll ever be, is all dependent on how others view me. That's all there is to it. I have no brain that chooses which foot I'll step out of bed from. I'm an idiot. Nothing more, nothing less.
"For you, someone you ignored, you had no perception of me. Or perhaps I should say you didn't make it clear to me what your view of me was? That's why I had to conjure up ways to get your attention. And when what I came up with, what I did, didn't work, I wanted to give up. So that day, when you didn't bring lunch, I offered to share, and you rejected me once more. I left my lunch there as a white flag. That's when I decided to give up trying to be your friend. But after that day, when I said hey to you, you didn't ignore me. You acknowledged me. It felt like all my efforts weren't in vain.
"That day, I think we became friends.
"Maybe I'm just some nuisance to you who does nothing but bother you all the time.
"But you looked at me.
"Not as a beautiful girl.
"Not as the smartest girl in the world.
"Not as the most popular girl out there.
"But me. You saw me as a person. And I can never express to you just how happy I am that you accepted me for me. The way you saw me was as just some person who tried too hard to be your friend. And when our relationship finally began to flourish, you probably still saw me that way, in a negative light. But even though you viewed me in such a negative way, you let me in.
"I earned your trust—
"It wasn't handed to me on a silver platter—
"Sorry for tearing up; this is something I wanted to let out of my mind for a long while now.
"So, Kumiko, all I have left for you is one, singular request. You're my best friend, so I'm certain you can fulfill my request.
"Kumiko, can you refrain from killing me, pretty please?"