Yujin Calliope…
When I noticed, I was writing down his name.
Since childhood, my sister excelled in everything.
In comparison, I was stupid, slow, and had no talent whatsoever.
Father and Mother only looked at my sister as the one who would rebuild the crumbling family.
It was sad, but still, I thought of us as a family.
But on my sister's birthday.
The day everyone was blessing my sister.
…And the day I stayed in my room alone because of a severe cold.
Outside the room, the party sounds never ceased, but no one came to me as I coughed up blood due to a sore throat.
That day, I realized.
I was nothing but a shadow of my sister.
"…called me. Sister."
"Yeah, Vivian. Congratulations. Your Older Sister got admitted to Carnea Academy."
One day, while drinking tea at the garden table, my sister said.
To me, who thought I would forever live under my sister's shadow, it sounded like a dream.
The hope that I thought I had deeply buried resurfaced.
Carnea Academy was a boarding school for all.
Didn't that mean I wouldn't see my sister for three years if she got admitted there?
I couldn't show it, but I was so happy that for the first time since I was born, I could be away from my sister.
"Congratulations on entering Carnea Academy."
It was a sincere word.
I wondered if Father and Mother would pay attention to me if my sister wasn't around.
I didn't want to take my sister's place.
I knew I could never replace my sister.
But…
If I could receive just a tiny bit of the attention my sister got…
Wouldn't I be recognized as a member of the family too?
But my sister's following words crushed my hopes.
"Yeah, it's great. So, you should come next year too."
"Huh…?"
I couldn't understand.
No, I didn't want to understand.
Just when I thought I was finally free, she told me to come back under her wing…
"Um, Sister, what's the meaning of…"
"Every time you answer like that, you look so stupid. I'm telling you to enroll in Carnea Academy next year too."
"It's, it's impossible for someone like me to go to Carnea… Th, that's unreasonable."
The first words I spoke to my sister in my life.
"…Vivian."
As my sister called my name, my whole body froze.
My sister cut a piece of cake with a fork and put it in her mouth.
"Are you going to throw up at my words?"
"Ah.. No. It's not like that."
"Hmm…"
My sister twirled the fork she was holding with her finger.
Terrifying. Terrifying. Terrifying.
My legs knelt down on their own.
"Um, Sister. I'm sorry. I'll, I'll go in. I'll somehow get in."
"Yeah, of course. You have to. If you don't come in, there will be big trouble."
──Thud
The fork pierced the strawberry on the cake.
"I'll wait. Vivian."
"Yes… Yes… Sister."
I shouldn't have even harbored hope.
It was unbearably sad, but I didn't even have the freedom to be sad.
"Smile, Vivian. You're going to the same academy as your proud older sister, you should smile."
"Uh..? He..hehe.. Sorry, Sister. I must be crying because I'm happy."
Wiping the tears with my sleeve, I forcibly lifted the corners of my trembling lips.
Once again, I realized.
A shadow can never escape from its sister.
A year later on the day of the Carnea Academy entrance ceremony.
Barely admitted as the 150th, I was sitting at the very back of the auditorium.
During the ceremony, nothing could be heard.
The mere fact of being at the same school as my sister was too frightening.
While trembling, the ceremony ended and students were leaving in groups.
I… couldn't return to my room.
I was afraid my sister might come looking for me if I was there.
I sat alone until the library closed and then went back.
Tears flowed as I lay in bed.
Why was I the only one suffering so much?
I wanted to die but didn't even have the courage to do so.
…But I was thankful for my cowardice.
If I had died that day, I wouldn't have met Yujin Calliope.
He helped me without any conditions.
He matched his pace for someone as clumsy as me, and even though he must have been tired, he purposefully fell for my sake.
In the moment of me trying to help him up, he even sent a look that told me not to worry and just run.
It was a first.
For the first time in my life, I met someone who cared for me, not just for my sister.
That day, instead of going to the library, I was waiting for him in the classroom.
I didn't notice Yujin approaching as I focused on practicing just to say thank you…
When the door opened, I was so startled that I accidentally hid in the janitor's closet.
And from there, I watched Yujin drink water.
"Kuuuuh."
I was happy.
Even if I didn't do it.
The fact that he drank was a joy in itself.
It felt like I was recognized as not being a meaningless existence.
The next day, I arrived early at the classroom again.
Partly to escape from my sister, but also in hopes of meeting Yujin.
But Yujin didn't come.
"He's not coming…"
We hadn't made any promises, but feeling down about it made me feel pathetic.
Just then, the door opened and someone entered.
It was Yujin Calliope.
I almost burst out laughing.
We hadn't spoken at all, but I was still happy.
As I doodled in my notebook and stole glances at his profile, I dropped my pen.
"Ah…"
The pen stopped at his feet.
Why did I always make mistakes?
While berating myself, Yujin picked up the pen and handed it to me.
"Here you go."
"Th-thank you…"
"It's nothing."
A truly minor kindness.
Yet, it was enough to melt into my parched heart.
From that day on, we talked every morning.
"Oh, a book by Yulius Henry."
"…You know Yulius too?"
"Of course. He's one of my favorite authors."
Though the conversation was trivial, it was the happiest moment of my life.
I too felt like it was a dream that I could be this happy.
But…
The door opened, and I was awakened from the dream.
"Ah! It hurts! It really hurts."
"Stop exaggerating. How can it hurt that much?"
I saw Yujin chatting amiably with other girls.
To me, he was the only precious person…
But to him, I was just one of many friends.
Seeing him chatting with the others felt like tears were about to burst.
But if I cry now, it would embarrass Yujin.
I bit my lip hard and held back the tears.
What was I expecting?
What was I hoping for?
I knew it from the start.
…I knew, but it was too painful.
That I meant nothing to him.
After the lecture, I ran back to the dormitory as if fleeing.
"…Idiot."
It's embarrassing to pretend to be the tragic heroine when no one even noticed.
Trying to clear my mind, I opened the window for some air, and found a letter stuck in the window frame.
Chills ran down my spine.
I was afraid it might be a letter from my sister.
I opened the letter hoping it wasn't today, but the contents were more shocking.
[To the author,
I have not known about this work for long…]
Thud.
Startled, I dropped the letter.
Last year, in the summer.
I had made the worst decision.
In my twisted desire for someone to care about me, I sold an erotic book starring myself.
…But I regained my senses the next day and recalled all copies.
"How…how could…"
I thought I had recalled all of them, but the arrival of this letter clearly meant someone used the letter paper from the book.
It was expensive, but just in case a letter came, I had placed letter paper in the very last page of the book to come directly to my room so the family wouldn't find out.
"What…what should I do?"
That someone used this letter paper to send meant fortunately, my identity wasn't discovered, but the anxious feeling that someone was reading my book had me pacing back and forth in my dorm room.
[I entered an old bookstore and chose this book, and I felt it was destiny. I have read many books, but…]
However, along with the anxiety, there was also gratitude.
That someone read my book and wrote me a letter…
At least to this person, I meant something.
"I should ignore it."
It's not just any book; it's that kind of book.
It's not good to get closer. I knew this in my head.
[Then, I await your reply.]
But the phrase written in the letter weighed on my mind.
"…it's me anyway… they won't know… just this once."
Making excuses to herself, Vivian sat down at the desk.
"You seem to be enjoying yourself, Master."
Lucia, who now naturally cleaned my room as if it were expected, said.
It's enjoyable. This response is proof that Vivian's strategy is working perfectly.
"…Lucia. You did the job you were asked, right?"
"Yes! I laundered the client several times so they wouldn't be caught. And from the looks of it, it would have happened soon even without Master's orders."
I nodded at Lucia's response.
It's odd for me to say this, given I was the one orchestrating such situations…
Vivian was just in the perfect position to be tormented.
Being a noble, she couldn't fit in with the commoners' groups.
Yet, she couldn't really join the nobles' gatherings either, as the Beatrice family was like a setting sun.
Moreover, with her timid nature, not attending social events, she had no friends or acquaintances, and even her admission grades were at the bottom.
And above all…
The problem was that many resented Vivian's sister, a capable and rude second-year student.
Those who harbor resentment against her sister can't confront her directly, but they have enough power to torment her younger sibling.
'It looks like the sister is almost the root of all evil.'
It's also because of her sister that Vivian is unaware of her own strengths and has developed such a timid personality.
At a young age, having awakened her unique abilities, her sister tormented and ignored Vivian, and bullied her so much that Vivian couldn't even make her own decisions.
"Tsk tsk, if only it weren't for her sister, she would have graduated from the academy without any trouble."
It's unfortunate for Vivian, but she's going to suffer for a while.
"Well, it works out well for me."
I smiled at the thought of training Vivian, who was dependent on me.
*****
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