[4:20 PM – Bedford Laundromat]
The late afternoon sun poured gold across the cracked sidewalks as Alex pulled up in his matte black SUV. (He decided to drive his SUV for a change.) The laundromat was buzzing with energy, but the chaos had structure now. Controlled. Precise.
He stepped out, the heavy door swinging shut behind him, and took in the scene.
The exterior had been completely overhauled. Fresh paint gleamed under the neon signs. "Spin to Win" flickered above the doorway in hot pink and electric blue. The cracked windows were replaced with thick, crystal-clear glass, trimmed in steel frames that gave the building an old-school Vegas charm.
Shay met him at the front, clipboard tucked under her arm, her buzzcut catching the light. She wore dark jeans, combat boots, and a black Titan-branded hoodie. No nonsense, like always.
"You're early," she said.
Alex smiled faintly. "Couldn't wait."
She nodded once and gestured for him to follow.
Inside, the laundromat had been transformed.
The retro floor tiles shined. The walls were covered in custom graffiti murals, blending vibrant colors and chaotic shapes. Spinning washers lined the back, each one rewired and softly glowing with colored lights inside. Some were already loaded with drinks, their doors sealed with clear plexiglass so guests could grab cold sodas and shooters straight from the drum.
The photo booth had been set up against the far wall. A neon sign above it blinked "Maximum Chaos" in a jagged font. Props were already piled beside it: glitter crowns, leather jackets, fake microphones, inflatable guitars.
The prom room next door had been gutted and reborn. A glimmering chandelier hung dead center, refracting pink and blue across the space. Tables lined the perimeter, draped in deep red velvet cloths, set with trays of candy, sliders, tater tots, and cocktails disguised as detergent bottles.
At the back, a low stage stood ready. Microphones gleamed. A vintage baby grand piano, freshly polished, waited under a spotlight. The Early Birds' instruments sat in labeled cases off to the side, ready for soundcheck.
Alex walked slowly through the space, hands in his pockets. Every inch screamed Max. It was rough around the edges, ridiculous, gorgeous, wild. Perfect.
One of the workers handed Shay a clipboard and gave a thumbs-up before disappearing out the back.
"All equipment arrived from Titan HQ," Shay said, flipping through the checklist. "No damage. No missing items. Ice machines running. Washers cold. Stage rigged. Sound test at five. Glitter cannon rigged."
Alex raised a brow. "Glitter cannon?"
Shay smirked. "You said chaos."
He laughed quietly under his breath and kept moving.
Near the back, one of the workers was testing the lighting rig. A quick flash of soft golden floodlights illuminated the room, then shifted into deeper purples and midnight blues.
Alex crossed his arms and leaned against the doorway, taking it all in.
For once, he had nothing to fix. No fires to put out. No frantic last-minute patch jobs.
It was ready.
It was all exactly the way it needed to be.
Shay walked up beside him.
"Tomorrow night," she said, more statement than question.
Alex nodded.
"It'll be good," Shay added. "She'll lose her damn mind."
Alex smiled. "That's the point."
...
[5:20 PM – Williamsburg Diner]
The low hum of conversation floated through the air as Alex pushed open the door. The bell above the frame gave a tired jingle.
Inside, the diner looked the same as always. Faded booths. Scuffed floors. The faint smell of frying bacon that had somehow soaked into the walls decades ago. A few regulars lingered at the corner tables, nursing their coffees and trading stories nobody really believed.
Earl sat at the counter, counting bills into a neat stack. A pencil balanced behind one ear. His stained white apron was tied loosely around his waist, and he muttered numbers under his breath like he was reciting prayers.
Alex made his way over, boots thudding softly against the cracked linoleum.
Earl didn't look up.
"If you're here to rob the place," he said, "come back tomorrow. We close early on Wednesdays."
Alex smirked and dropped onto the stool next to him.
"No robbery. Just news."
Earl flicked a glance at him, then kept counting.
"You got that look. The one that means you're about to make me work."
Alex leaned back, resting his elbows on the counter.
"I swung by the laundromat. Everything's ready. Stage is good to go. Thought you might want to swing by tonight, run a few rehearsals. Check the piano. Maybe throw Tony into a washer if he shows up late."
At that, Earl finally cracked a grin. A real one. He slapped the last bill onto the stack and turned toward Alex.
"You serious? It's ready?"
Alex nodded.
"Spotlights, amps, backup gear, even a glitter cannon."
Earl whistled low.
"Glitter cannon, huh? You're lucky Max ain't allergic to drama. Otherwise, we'd all be screwed."
One of the regulars, an old guy with a bushy beard and a Vietnam vet cap, looked over his coffee.
"Glitter's the devil's dust," he said solemnly, like it was a known fact.
Earl barked a laugh and waved him off.
"Don't listen to him. He once tried to eat a glow stick thinking it was a popsicle."
The vet flipped him the bird without looking up.
Alex smiled and stood.
"You want me to send a car for the Early Birds?"
Earl shook his head, grabbing a battered leather satchel from behind the counter.
"Nah. We'll haul our own asses over. I got the boys on speed dial. They'll be there. Hell, half of them still owe Max favors from back when she bailed them out of that bar fight at Flannery's."
Alex raised a brow.
"She bailed them out?"
Earl chuckled.
"Max don't brag about it, but yeah. She called me, cussed for a good ten minutes, then paid their bail with her own tips. Said something about 'protecting the endangered species known as middle-aged man-babies.'"
Alex laughed under his breath.
"Sounds like her."
He took out a spare key and gave it to Earl.
Earl took the key, turning it over in his calloused hand, studying it like it might explode.
Alex watched him quietly.
"You trust me with this?" Earl asked, voice low.
"Yeah," Alex said. "You're part of the plan."
Earl tucked the key into his jacket without another word. He looked at Alex, then gave a small, respectful nod. The kind of nod you didn't toss around unless it meant something.
Alex clapped him lightly on the shoulder and headed for the door.
Behind him, Earl called out, "Hey."
Alex paused, half-turning.
"You're doing a good thing, kid. Keep that girl of mine safe and away from troubles."
Alex gave a small smile. "That's the goal."
Outside, the sun was dipping low, casting long shadows across the streets. He pulled his jacket tighter against the sudden chill and checked his watch.
Tomorrow night.
Max's night.
Everything had to be perfect.
He slipped into his SUV and pulled away from the curb, the city blurring around him.
...
[6:35 PM – Alex's Penthouse – Private Kitchen]
Alex kicked off his boots at the door, tossing his jacket over a chair. The city lights flickered far below the massive windows, but he barely glanced at them. He quickly freshened up, and then his focus was locked on the kitchen counter.
There it was.
Waiting.
The mystery box rewards from the System.
In front of him:
A slightly glowing cookbook (already giving off faint, suspicious sparkles)
A spatula lying next to it, looking innocent… but if he listened closely, he could swear it was… humming? Low, weird, almost moaning noises, like a cheap romance novel on audio.
Alex rubbed his face.
"Jesus. I can't believe I'm about to do this."
He flipped open the cookbook. Instantly, the pages fluttered by themselves until one stopped mid-flip.
Recipe Selected: Divine Chaos Chocolate Cake
(Difficulty: "You're Screwed")
The page had zero measurements. No list of ingredients. Just a series of vague instructions:
Step 1: Channel your inner disaster.
Step 2: Bake with love, sarcasm, and rage.
Step 3: DO NOT overthink. DO NOT underthink. DO NOT anger the cake.
Alex stared at it.
"Great. It's a cake that requires emotional stability. I'm already screwed."
He grabbed the spatula.
The second his hand closed around it, the thing let out a long, sultry groan.
"Oooh, daddy, whisk me harder~"
Alex froze.
"Absolutely not," he muttered.
He tried again, lifting the spatula carefully.
It gave a playful giggle and whispered, "Mmm... stiff peaks only, baby~"
"You're a spatula," Alex told it, voice flat. "Behave."
The spatula only trembled excitedly in his hand.
Alex exhaled sharply through his nose, stalking toward the pantry.
"Fine. You wanna be dirty? We're baking dirty."
He yanked open cabinets, grabbing flour, cocoa powder, sugar, baking soda, eggs, vanilla. Half the labels he trusted, the other half he guessed. One item he pulled off a high shelf looked suspiciously like it was labeled "Instant Regret Extract."
He shoved it back.
Bowl. Whisk. Oven preheating. Counter covered in chaos.
Somewhere between sifting the flour and cracking the third egg, the cookbook vanished... one blink and it was gone.
Alex blinked at the now-empty counter.
"Awesome. No pressure."
The spatula snickered in his grip. "Mmm, crack that egg, daddy. Show that yolk who's boss~."
He pointed at it.
"If you don't shut up, you're going in the dishwasher forever."
It made a sad little whimper but stayed blessedly quiet after that.
Alex measured with instincts alone. He eyeballed everything. Poured until it looked right. Stirred until it felt wrong, then stirred a little more.
Batter splattered. Flour dusted his sleeves. Cocoa powder streaked across his cheekbone like war paint. He tasted the batter off his finger once and muttered, "Could be worse," before dumping it into the cake pans.
He shoved the pans into the oven, set the timer… and stood there, arms crossed, flour in his hair, glaring at the oven like it owed him money.
[7:55 PM – Same Kitchen – 45 Minutes Later]
The timer beeped. The cake was done.
Or… at least not on fire.
Alex pulled it out, wary.
The cake layers were crooked. The top had a slight crater, like it had survived a minor meteor strike.
He set the cakes on the counter, staring.
"...It's ugly."
The spatula, now hanging limply from a hook, whispered dreamily, "Still sexier than half your board members~."
"How the hell do you know my board members? Wait! I don't even want to know," He looked around the kitchen. "Where the hell is that book?"
Alex wiped his hands on a towel and scanned the kitchen.
The cookbook was nowhere in sight. Not on the counter. Not under the sink. Not floating midair, taunting him, which honestly wouldn't have surprised him at this point.
He turned in a slow circle, frowning.
There.
On top of the fridge.
Glowing faintly. Mockingly.
He quickly rushed and grabbed it. The second his fingers touched the cover, it flipped open on its own, slamming down on the counter with a heavy thud.
This time, the pages didn't flutter.
This time, there were actual instructions.
Real ones. Measurements. Temperatures. Mixing times. Cooling steps. Frosting guides.
Across the top in bold, dramatic lettering:
Divine Chaos Chocolate Cake (Real Version)
Difficulty: Manageable if you stop acting like an idiot.
Alex narrowed his eyes at the heading.
"Real mature," he muttered.
Still, he felt a grin tugging at the edge of his mouth. Challenge accepted.
He rinsed out the bowls, reset the workspace, and started over.
Measured properly.
Sifted carefully.
Whipped the eggs and sugar until they were pale and thick like the book said.
Melted the chocolate and butter together until it was glossy.
Folded everything with patient, steady hands.
The batter was heavier this time. Richer. It slid into the pans like lava.
He popped them into the oven, cleaned the counters again, and leaned back against the island, arms crossed.
The spatula hung from its hook, behaving for once.
The city outside glittered like spilled diamonds, but Alex didn't even glance at it. His whole focus stayed locked on that oven.
Forty minutes later, when the cakes emerged, they were different.
Golden at the edges. Smooth on top. They looked... right. Not perfect, but real. Alive.
He set them carefully on a cooling rack and grabbed the frosting ingredients.
The book gave a new list: butter, cocoa, powdered sugar, cream, and a splash of coffee.
Alex mixed it with the spatula, which changed its shape and size accordingly, slowly and carefully, until it turned thick and silky.
After mixing....
He scooped a generous mound of frosting onto the first cake layer.
The spatula, obedient at first, glided through the glossy chocolate like a dream.
Then it started again.
"Mmm, spread me nice and thick, big guy~"
Alex paused, eyes narrowing.
"You said you'd behave."
The spatula wiggled suggestively in his hand, dragging an extra swirl across the surface.
"I'm frosting a cake, not auditioning for a bad soap opera," Alex muttered, adjusting his grip.
The spatula sighed dramatically. "Harder... slower... yes, like that..."
Alex bit down on a groan, carefully smoothing frosting over the sides. He pressed the second layer on top, ignoring the spatula's breathless little noises every time he applied pressure.
As he worked, the cake finally started looking like something you might actually want to eat and not bury in the backyard.
Rich, dark layers. Smooth frosting. A little rustic around the edges, sure, but proud. Honest.
Alive.
The spatula, meanwhile, was losing its mind.
"Oooh baby, stack me higher. Frost my naughty little crumb coat, you rugged pastry god..."
Alex set the spatula down with a decisive thunk.
"You," he said, pointing at it, "are banned from talking until we're done."
It wiggled pitifully but stayed silent.
He finished the top with slow, careful strokes, leaving thick swoops and curls of chocolate that caught the kitchen light. The frosting wasn't perfectly smooth, but it had character, and somehow that made it even better.
When he finally stepped back, arms crossed, he had to admit:
It looked damn good.
The spatula, now hanging limp and exhausted on the counter, managed one last breathy whisper.
"...Best... cake... climax... ever..."
Alex wiped a smear of frosting off his wrist with a towel.
"You're going straight into a drawer after this," he said.
The spatula gave a tiny whimper of pleasure.
He shook his head, laughing under his breath despite himself.
Cake: finished.
Kitchen: a war zone.
Spatula: in desperate need of therapy.
Alex: victorious.
He stared at the finished cake one more time, pride swelling in his chest.
....
[POWERSTONES AND REVIEWS PLS]-
Support link: www.patr eon.com/UnknownMaster
[6 advance chs] + [14 chs of Two and a Half Men: Waking up as Charlie Harper] [All chs available for all tiers]
....
AN: I know some want to know the release date of 2 and a half men, well, I won't give a date right now. My workload has increased, and I am writing 2 chs per week for this new one. So, if I release it now, then 2 Broke Girls's chapter release will decrease, which I don't want since it's one of the top 20 ff here. So, I'll release after I finish writing 6 more chs.