Scene: Machio's Room, Later That Day
The sky darkened above Mishima City, and thunder rumbled faintly in the distance. In a cramped, manga-covered room glowing with RGB lights, two idiots stared at the ultimate invention of degenerate dreams.
"Behold," Nariyuki whispered with reverence, lifting a sleek black headset with questionable stickers. "The Pervy VR Box. Limited edition. Banned in five countries. Designed in Akihabara."
Machio sweatdropped. "Is that...a loli warning sticker?"
"It enhances the immersion!" Nariyuki chirped. "I got it on discount after that lawsuit."
Before Machio could object, the headset buzzed to life.
> [SYSTEM QUEST: Pervy VR Mode Initiated]
Objective: Survive 30 minutes in the Simulation without getting nosebleed Level 10. Rewards: Mystery Panty Gacha Ticket x1
Machio groaned. "This system is going to get me expelled... or arrested."
"C'mon, just put it on already," Nariyuki said. "I programmed it with your 'preferences.'"
"Wait, what does that mean—"
Too late.
CLICK.
The headset whirred—and suddenly, Machio was no longer in his bedroom. He was—
Inside a Hot Spring Bathhouse Simulation.
Steam curled seductively around pixelated stone. Cherry blossoms floated in the digital breeze. A bamboo curtain slid open…
And out stepped Tachibana, wearing a very unrealistic towel.
"MACHIO!? What the HELL is this!?"
Before he could answer, Anzu walked in, her cheeks pink. "W-We're in a simulation? Is this… fanservice?"
Matsumi sighed, leaning against a pillar with water droplets running down her curves. "Figures. This is exactly the kind of pervert stunt you'd pull."
"I didn't!" Machio cried. "This is Nariyuki's fault—!"
Suddenly—
> [New Player Entered: Azumi Araki]
"Woooow!" A cheerful voice rang out. "What a pretty spa! Oh, is this a game? Machiooo~?"
Machio froze in horror. His mom… his mom… had entered the VR.
Azumi Araki appeared in a frilly pink swimsuit, her silver hair tied up in a cute bun. She looked twenty years younger in the simulation.
"What a fun game!" she beamed, spinning around. "I hope it has massage mini-games!"
Tachibana's eye twitched. "THAT'S. YOUR. MOM!?"
"PLEASE LOG OUT," Machio screamed.
And then—
> [New Player Entered: Kira]
Kira appeared shirtless, a towel slung over his shoulder, vampire tattoo glowing faintly. He blinked, seeing Azumi.
"Oh. Hell. Yes."
"Kira?" Azumi tilted her head. "Oh! Aren't you that handsome boy from the store?"
"Heh," Kira said, flipping his hair. "Handsome vampire boy, to be precise."
Azumi gasped. "Are we roleplaying? Ooooh I love dramatic fantasy!" She clapped. "But no biting, young man!"
Kira smirked. "Only if you ask nicely, mama-san."
Machio screamed into the digital void.
Scene Cut: Real World - Machio's Room
Nariyuki watched with a wide grin. "I uploaded a 'Date the Vampire' expansion pack. Let's see if he survives the mommy route!"
Suddenly, the door slammed open.
Tachibana, Matsumi, and Anzu stood there—for real.
"You left your VR port open, idiot," Anzu said. "So we hacked in."
Matsumi cracked her knuckles. "Let's teach him a real-life lesson."
Nariyuki's eyes sparkled. "Wait—don't break the headset! It's got breast physics 6.0!"
Scene Cut: VR World - Spa Chaos
Azumi was now on a massage table, humming happily. Kira, shirt unbuttoned and eyes glowing seductively, was rubbing her shoulders.
"This is surprisingly realistic," Azumi giggled. "You have talented hands, young man!"
"I can do more than hands," Kira whispered.
"M-MOM NOOOO!" Machio dove to interrupt—
SLIP!
He fell face-first into Tachibana's chest, who had just spawned beside him in a yukata.
"Y-You perverted SLIME!" she yelled.
Anzu, sitting in the hot spring with a watermelon, just muttered, "You know… this might be better than Netflix."
Rosaria appeared digitally, lounging topless behind steam. "Miss me, my sweet nephew?"
"STOP CALLING ME THAT!"
Then—
> [SYSTEM ALERT: Ecchi Overload – Steam Engine Meltdown Imminent]
Matsumi, now in VR too, facepalmed. "This is why boys shouldn't be allowed technology."
Just then, the principal appeared in a horrifyingly realistic swimsuit. Heimi Kuronuma, age 65, muscle-bound and covered in oil.
"Oh ho ho! I see my students are using school VR equipment without authorization…"
Everyone screamed.
Azumi, confused, asked, "Why is there a glistening old man?"
Kira grabbed Azumi's hand. "Time to run, darling!"
"Darling!?" Machio choked. "I'M RIGHT HERE!"
Scene Cut: Real World - Destruction
The VR headset exploded in sparks.
Everyone flew backward. Smoke filled the room. Matsumi coughed. "T-Too much jiggle physics…"
Machio lay face-up, dazed. "That was the worst quest ever."
Azumi, in her apron, stood over him. "You've been hiding something from me, haven't you?"
He gulped. "Define hiding…"
She bent down, deadly calm. "You're grounded."
"FOR WHAT!?"
"For not inviting your mother to more of these games."
Kira, still shirtless, leaned in. "Do I still get a date?"
Azumi blushed. "I am single…"
"NOOOOOOO!" Machio cried, as Nariyuki gave him a thumbs up from the corner.
> [SYSTEM QUEST COMPLETE:
+1 Mystery Panty Gacha Ticket
+3 Relationship Points: Azumi x Kira
Penalty: Trauma – Mother Route Unlocked.]
---
To be continued