Shiro sweat dropped, looking at a pouting Ayame. "Hey, I know I've dealt with your bad attitude towards me, but you're acting like it's my fault for existing right now."
"I'm not..." She pouted more.
"Say...why're you even mad at me in the first place?" He blankly stared. "You've been like this since the first time we met."
"I won't say it!"
Shiro sweat dropped more. "How petty can you be?"
"I wouldn't be like this if you said something nicer back then." Ayame kept pouting.
"Back then? What'cha mean?"
"Our first time meeting?" Ayame looked at Shiro.
"First time meeting..." Shiro zoned out, recalling what happened exactly.
I was making my way towards the mall, then a fight transpired...then I departed from that place...Wait..."Yeah yeah, I didn't save you girls just cause you're girls. I just hate troublemakers. Anyway, see ya." "Was it what I said before I left?"
"YES!"
"A-Ah, I see..." Shiro sweat dropped. "Well, I was keeping my distance from girls at that time, you know? Unlike now where I sort of warmed up to them again."
"A little 'Don't mention it' could've been nice." Ayame let out a sigh. "Anyway, you're my bodyguard for today, so just watch over me and get things from the top shelves if I can't reach it."
"Yeah, yeah." Such a cute face with a cute personality around others, but when it's me, she acts angy. Shiro cried. Welp, I guess that is the consequence of my own actions...
Shiro took a quick glance at her face, tracing her features with his eyes. That milky, glowing skin of hers must have attracted a couple boys back in her high school days. Her eyes were red like his but they had happy, innocent tones to it. Her nose was short, yet it complemented her soft-looking cheeks, giving a delicate balance to her looks.
She had to be confessed to at least twice. Shiro chuckled.
This made Ayame look at him. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing. Don't mind it."
"...You were looking at me, weren't you?" Ayame glared at him.
"Nope. I was just thinking of a funny joke." Shiro chuckled more.
"No, you were definitely looking at my face!"
"Just shut up and walk."
"Jeez, I get it, okay?!" Ayame said as she punched him.
"OW!" Shiro grabbed his arm. "Jesus, I forgot you were capable of breaking tables and throwing your own father down."
Ayame smugged. "Funny coming from a past soldier. Shouldn't you be stronger than a woman?"
"Okay, now you're just bullying me." Shiro had a tick on his head. "No wonder people say Ojou is kind." He blankly stared.
"Okay, you...!" She turned to him and looked like she was gonna punch him again.
"Just..." Shiro grabbed her head, turned her around and pushed her slightly. "...keep moving to the supermarket."
Ayame pouted once again. "Don't touch my head." She said, patting her head and combing her hair.
They picked out the important groceries first. Vegetables and fruits. After that, they bought a few chips and snacks. Shiro was just behind, watching her and the surroundings to make sure nobody was causing trouble. For Shiro, he thought it was funny as it felt like a big brother going with his little sister.
I wonder how Shiina is doing. He smiled.
"Hey, Shiro-kun." Ayame said.
"Hmm?"
"I want ice cream."
"Then go get it."
"I want you to buy me one as a treat."
"I...thought you were paying for everything." Shiro sweat dropped.
"Oh no no, I was thinking of buying you a snack too in return."
"That's basically the same thing as if we bought the snack and ice cream ourselves." Shiro sweat dropped more.
"The snacks are cheaper. Besides..." Ayame gleamed at the ice cream area. "Nobody gets between a lady and her ice cream!"
Shiro chuckled. "Okay, okay. Well, if you're gonna get a snack, then buy me some fruits. I don't want to eat too much junkfoods."
"Well, look at Mr. Healthy here. You're a streamer, you know?"
"Unlike you guys, I keep myself healthy with a good sleep schedule."
Ayame giggled. "Good point."
Shiro widened his eyes and looked at her. D-Did she just giggle? Shiro smiled widely in his mind. THAT'S CUTE!
They both went to the freezer and Shiro slid it open. "So...what do you want here?"
"I want...this one!" Ayame pointed at a big sized Meiji vanilla-flavored ice cream.
"Alright."
"You don't want one?"
"Nope. I just need some bananas and my life will be good." Shiro picked up the ice cream and put it in the basket.
Ayame sweated a bit. "Y-You sure? I kinda feel bad that you won't get one."
"You did say I would just buy you this as a treat. You didn't say anything about me buying one for myself."
"Well, that is true..."
Shiro chuckled. "Don't worry. You wanted ice cream, right? You can buy a second one, and I wouldn't mind. Nothing gets between a lady and her ice cream, right?"
"Y-Yeah...Just get me one."
"Well, off it goes into the basket. Let's go get my fruit."
Ayame nodded. As he turned around, Ayame thought, Why did I feel a bit guilty just now? Eurgh, Ayame, you're being stupid. She blushed. I know what I did earlier was petty, but I still can't face him properly because of that.
~~Misogynistic Hololiver~~
They finally checked out everything and walked their way to a nearby stop.
"The sun's setting. You hungry?" Shiro asked.
"Maybe you are?"
"Don't get sassy with me." Shiro chuckled. "Besides, there're some nice diners here, and I've got some cash on me."
"No, I'm fine. I'll just eat-"
A grumble could be heard, and they looked at each other, knowing full well that it came from Ayame.
Shiro laughed out loud. "Hey, it's fine. You can eat outside."
"...Okay." Ayame surrendered immediately, blushing while groaning silently.
They went to a diner where there's not a lot of people, and it had some nice food, even if it was expensive for her budget.
"I-I'll take the cheapest option..." Ayame said while looking at the other items. I don't think I'd be able to afford that much just for one meal. It's too expensive for just a simple dish...
"Really? I can treat you, you know?"
"N-No! It's fine! The ice cream was enough."
"You know, when I said I had cash, that didn't mean just a puny ten-thousand yen. I have thirty-thousand here with a couple of coins."
"Why would you bring that much?!" Ayame's eyes lit up.
"You never know. Besides, I dare anybody to rob me." Shiro chuckled. "C'mon. Consider it as thanks for taking me along."
"B-But..."
"Hmm?"
"I'm the senpai..."
"Oh...another one of these Japanese traditions." Shiro blankly stared.
"H-Hey, that's insulting to your own country."
"I love Japan, but I don't like the traditions. Anyway, I don't exactly believe in these set-in-stone traditions, like how kouhais should never treat their senpais 'cause it's like you're considering them poor. For me, it's just an exchange thing. I'll do this, and you'll do something for me soon in return."
Ayame blushed and looked away. "R-Really, it's fine."
"You look skinny too, you know? You haven't been streaming much...and I'd feel bad if you got even skinnier. You won't attract men with that, you know?" Shiro chuckled.
"S-Shut up! I'm not looking for one anyway!" She pouted. "You better not regret this, okay? I want some wagyu beef here!"
"Sure." Shiro smiled. "I'll go order two." Judging from the price, it seems to be the lower-grade beef. Well, this is heaven for me, so I ain't got no complaints.
Ayame grabbed her hair and twisted it. Jeez...so this is what they were all talking about, him being nice and all...
She thought back to the first time they met each other, all the fleeting moments they spent together, up to the present moment when he gave the necklace to her. This made her blush a big tint of red. This guy...! He's dangerous to women!
There, she looked at Shiro for a second, seeing him talk to the person at the counter. She observed his tall stature, his big back, that white hair that always looks smooth no matter what, and his big hoodie. She didn't know why, but he looked quite cool today, treating her and acting kind.
Her heart skipped a beat. ...No no no! What the hell, Ayame?! Are you sick in the head? Y-Yeah! You have to be! You need to ask Mio-chan for help later on what this is!
"Hey, I'm back." Shiro held his mask, adjusting it slightly.
And there, Ayame had a sudden thought. "Wait, how are you going to eat with that mask on?"
"Hmm? Well...I was about to say it right now. Would you mind if you looked away for a bit once you're done eating? You'll eat first, and I eat after." Shiro scratched his head and looked away. "D-Don't worry! I eat fast. It'll take like 4 minutes."
"O-Oh? Are you not comfortable with showing it?"
"Well...yeah." Shiro held his mask. "I just don't like being reminded of it."
Ayame looked at him and frowned a bit. "Why? Don't you see it everyday?"
"I do. I just...don't like to think about it much." Shiro chuckled. "I get nightmares sometimes."
"Nightmares?"
"Yeah. It makes me think back to the times I was in the military...let's just say it wasn't pleasant. The only good memories I have there were my friends." Shiro smiled bittersweetly. "I'm sure I mentioned this before on stream, but this scar was caused by a woman who I held dearly in my heart. Very dearly. She was someone who I trusted with my life and always cared for...then she..." Shiro sighed and shook his head. "Sorry to tell you all this."
"A-Ah, don't worry!" Ayame giggled nervously. "I-I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable or something by asking that."
"Nah, it's fine. Just...I just need some time to let this heal and confront it little by little. For now, would it be fine if you accept this selfish request of mine?"
Ayame smiled and nodded. "If it makes you feel more comfortable, then I'm okay with it!"
Shiro looked at her smile. He felt warmth stirring inside him, and he couldn't help but smile too. "Keep doing that."
"Oh?"
"Keep smiling. You look better when you smile like that."
Ayame blushed even redder than before. "H-Hey! Are you trying to pick me up or something?! I told you, I'm not looking for a boyfriend right now!"
"Nah, I just don't think of things like this as too serious. It was just a compliment!" Shiro chuckled. "I just hope you'll treat me better like tonight moving forward."
Ayame looked away. "Y-Yeah..." She got her phone out, and scrolled through Twitter, intending to kill time.
"...Oh? What is this?" She tapped her screen.
"What's wrong?"
"There's recent news between Russia and Japan. Check Asahi Shimbun."
Shimbun, huh? Let's see...What the...
Shiro widened his eyes. The text he read on his phone was as follows,
"The guns used during the shooting of the mall were hinted to be of Slavic origin as the side of the gun had a symbol resembling the equivalent of an "f" in Cyrillic alphabet. Although it couldn't be traced exactly, there had been a case of this seen during JSDF operations, one of them being in Kazakhstan. As of now, leads say it may have come from Kazakhstan, Croatia, Serbia, or Russia."
"Japan really moved on things quickly, didn't it?" Ayame looked at Shiro.
He gave the article his fullest attention, unaware of his surroundings for this moment.
"Shiro-kun? Shiro-kun!"
"A-Ah, yeah?"
"What's wrong?"
"Um..." Shiro turned his phone off and put it back into his pocket. "It's nothing. Sorry, I was just reading the article." He giggled nervously. "Anyway, let's wait for our food, huh?"
She nodded. "I can't wait!"
~~Misogynistic Hololiver~~
"So...did you like it?" Shiro cracked his neck and stretched a bit.
"Yeah. That was a really good meal!" Ayame said like she was drowning in euphoria.
They went out of the diner and made their way to a nearby waiting area where they could hail a taxi.
Both of them sat down. While waiting for one, Shiro glanced at Ayame. He noticed she kept looking everywhere — her eyes were restless like her legs. She also scratched her hand slowly, like she held a thought but couldn't get it out.
"Is something wrong?"
"Oh? A-Ah, nothing." Ayame giggled nervously.
"Oh...okay."
Ayame peeked at him as he kept looking at the streets and the sky, waiting for a taxi to come by. Once again, that sensation came back. She watched his hair swaying gently in the breeze, her gaze shifting to his large hoodie again, hinting at his solid build, and she felt that sense of safety around him. She couldn't help but blush. The mixed feelings stirring in her made Ayame's chest tighten.
A car drove by, honking at another car. "...Thank you for treating me." She mumbled.
"Oh? Did ya say something?"
"Hmm? N-No, I didn't." Ayame looked away.
"Oh...okay."
~~Misogynistic Hololiver~~
"You're not going back yet?" Ayame asked.
"Nope. I'd like to unwind for a bit. It's been one heck of a week, after all." Shiro waved.
"A-Alright. S-See you!"
"Yup. See ya later." Shiro said as Ayame waved and closed the door.
"Alright...Time to take a walk. The park's just within walking distance anyway." Shiro chuckled. "At least, in men's terms."
The night streets went from bustling and noisy to peaceful and quiet as Shiro made his way to the park.
The breeze felt like the ocean winds at the Academy — cold yet calming. Nights like these always gave a quiet sense of peace. Shiro always liked staring at the moon, seeing how bright it could shine over everything. It enhanced the view, seeing shadows form in the night. He didn't like clouds or rainy weather covering the beautiful moon.
In the background, he could hear some Chinese being spoken. The voices were familiar to him, so his ears perked up. Oh?
He looked to his right, and he saw two familiar girls. "Wait...Aren't those two...?"
Shiro walked towards them and as he got closer, the two also noticed him. They made eye contact.
"Oh? Shiro?"
"Ah, I was right. It's you two, Artia and Yogiri." Funny. Two opposites in the HoloCN spectrum. One absolutely hated, and one that is loved a lot.
"What were y'all doing here?" Shiro asked in English.
"Ah, we were just walking. We just finished eating, so we decided to unwind right after."
"What a coincidence. So did I." Shiro chuckled. "Let's walk together." He switched to Chinese.
"I don't mind." Artia smiled.
"Me neither." Yogiri said.
The three walked together, going around the park.
"Say, Shiro. You don't mind speaking in Chinese for us?" Yogiri asked.
"Nah. I've talked in Chinese a lot before, even if it was just a month...so I can hold conversations, at least most of the time." Shiro giggled nervously.
"The view of the moon is beautiful, isn't it?"
"Yeah..."
"Sometimes, I just like to relax and be in a place where my mind is just free to reflect on anything. It almost makes you forget the bad things, right?" Artia said.
"Yeah." Shiro chuckled.
There was a moment of silence before Shiro thought of something. "...I hope I'm not being too sensitive here..."
"Hmm?" The two looked at him.
"Artia, please don't take this the wrong way. You and the others instigated the-"
"Ah...if it's about condemning me about the incident, then I know. I'm a piece of sh-"
"Listen to me, please? That's not what I was gonna say."
"Look. I get it. We fucked up." Artia stopped dead in her tracks.
"H-Hey, Artia-" Yogiri got cut off.
"I'm sorry, Yogiri, but...it's true. It's my fault that you, Spade-...No, all of us fell out. Mainly, it was me who led it. Yes. I was the main reason Coco and Haato had to go through all that, why Coco cried, and why Hololive had cut connections with the Chinese market."
Shiro could see Artia's hands and arms shaking vigorously. Her lips tightened, and she looked down and frowned. Whether it was because she felt regret or she hated getting caught in the act, Shiro didn't know. At least, not yet.
"Everybody knows, but Artia...The thing is, isn't Yogiri, like, innocent, according to the community?" Shiro asked.
"Y-Yeah...Actually...it was quite a complicated matter." Yogiri looked away.
"...I'm sorry if it hit a hard spot. It's just...how are you two getting along so well?"
"Oh? Heh. It's like Yogiri said. It was a very complex rollercoaster." Artia wiped her eyes.
"Well...before you cut me off, what I wanted to say was, yes, we all know you instigated it, but why exactly does it seem like nobody holds it against any of you? Why are you and Yogiri able to talk like you're good friends? I heard even Civia bullied her and Spade to death, and now, look. You all are still in the Holohouse, and nobody is fighting with any of you."
"Well...I'm sure that, even if it seems so, they still hate me...us, rather. I can't blame them though. Shiro, let me ask you. Do you love Japan?"
"Yes, of course."
"From what I've heard, you keep criticizing it." Artia chuckled.
"There's a saying by James Baldwin. 'I love America more than any other country in the world and, exactly for this reason, I insist on the right to criticize her perpetually.' What I hate are Japan's stuck-up traditions, useless ones that are outdated despite our progressiveness, and stupid norms that we somehow have to stick to. That's why I love Japan a lot. It blots its reputation."
"That's what I thought." Artia smiled. "I loved China a lot. I loved it so much, I guess I...can't help but defend it like my life depended on it." She scratched her head. "Yes, I betrayed the Hololivers. I acted like a two-faced prick behind their backs. I acted like everybody was my family when it was time to stream, and behind closed doors, I supported the antis. I didn't even like socializing much, especially when I was far from my homeland...Did you know Yogiri and Spade are Taiwanese? This is also why they didn't want to take part in it."
"Oh? I didn't know that."
"Yeah...It was also why Civia was initially weird around us." Yogiri giggled nervously.
"So? What made you turn your life around, despite that incident?" Shiro asked.
"Well...I always thought China should be revered, and that other countries are just pawns. Hell, when I heard that I had to go to Japan, I was disgusted, I won't lie." Artia sweat dropped nervously. "I know, you'll hate me for it."
"Well, I do, but...it seems you've warmed up to Japan." He chuckled.
"And that's the thing...After spending time with Yogiri, Civia, and the others, and seeing that everybody was so friendly and welcoming to us...it was too late for me. I thought, 'What have I done?' and I tried so hard to turn it around. I racked up so many fans, so surely, I could've done the same to reverse it, right?"
"But you were wrong...and in the end, your own fans turned against you, right?" Shiro said.
"Yeah..." Artia let out some tears, but she wiped them off quickly. "And to think even after all that, Coco and Haato still forgave us. I really wished none of that would've happened. W-We looked at Hololive like a cash cow, and in the end, I was forgiven by the 'enemy' while being backstabbed myself..."
Shiro looked her in the eyes. Of course, he looked into the incident, and did feel some hate deep inside. However, it always bugged him how, despite what social media said, they were fine behind the scenes. That's why he wasn't hostile initially. To see a girl who just wanted to hang out with her friends and even with someone who everybody said was an enemy to her made Shiro realize something.
She, like everybody else, was a human, and was manipulated by her beliefs. And like any other human, she could change, and she did. The same goes for everybody.
"Well, you changed now, right?" Shiro asked.
"...Yeah. I swore, from that day on, that I will do what it takes to protect them, even from the sidelines. I won't repeat a mistake nor an incident like that ever again." Artia curled her fists.
"Well, they say the heart forgives but the mind never forgets. I know...what it's like, screwing up...and always blaming yourself constantly...for your past experiences. It's horrible, just always being in self-hate. However, Artia..."
"Hmm?"
"You seemed to have changed, and that's good. That's respectable. If you can change yourself for the good, then do it. Always keep whatever happened in the past in your mind, but don't keep hating yourself for it."
"B-But...this changed Hololive as a whole...Because of this, everything changed."
"And so did I." Shiro said.
"W-What have you done to cause such a big change?"
"I...I left comrades to die."
Yogiri and Artia looked at him. "W-What? (Excuse me?)"
"I always made sure to save my men and fellow soldiers from tight situations. I promised a friend of mine I would be back right after I saved him from-" Shiro groaned and held his head. "...from an explosion..." He chuckled. "I thought that I was...a traitor...for being powerless when I thought I could've done something, even after learning from the past."
Shiro looked at Artia. "But you know what? If there was something I learned, it was this. 'Focus on the present. The past is way behind us now.' I know, it might seem...corny? Nah, I think cliche is the word." He chuckled. "But you've changed from your past. You've seen how everybody treated and welcomed you, and as a result, you softened up and treated them like family now. You don't have to be so caught up in your past...That doesn't mean you should disregard it, but your identity isn't your past self anymore. You are good now, and you want what's best for everybody. That's what you should focus on."
"B-But...there is this guilt in me, you know? I can't just...focus on the present all of a sudden when there's that lingering guilt."
"Embrace the guilt. Use that as fuel for the present time. Make it so that you won't experience that guilt ever again. If you confront and embrace the past, you may not heal right away, but you can learn to accept it, even if you get nightmares here and there." Shiro chuckled and scratched his head.
Artia looked to the ground and hugged herself. "Embrace it, huh?"
Yogiri looked at Artia, then back at Shiro. She smiled. "I appreciate you're taking the time to talk with her about it, Shiro. I'm glad you know even just a fraction of what we're dealing with right now."
"Yeah...and I'm also glad you all are actually getting along nicely behind the scenes despite everything in the past."
"Well...I guess that's how life goes." She giggled nervously.
Artia smiled and started tearing up again before wiping it. "Yeah...thanks, Shiro. I think you've cheered me up a bit with this talk right now, actually." Artia spoke in English.
"Oh? I was just listening to ya." Shiro chuckled.
"Still...I guess you're right. I shouldn't keep this cycle of self-hate with me forever. I should focus on the present. I'm here now."
Shiro smiled. "Say, you guys wanna get a snack? It's my treat."
"Eh? I-It's fine, don't worry." Artia said.
"Well...I am craving some ice cream right now. Would it be okay? It won't be too expensive, don't worry." Yogiri said.
"Don't worry." Shiro chuckled. "I brought money, so take anything you want, and I'll buy it."
"Eh?! Yogiri, that's-"
"It's fine, Artia. Think of it as something for comfort eating later." Shiro looked at her.
"Now that's just a bit mean!" Artia pouted. "It's like you're saying we're fat!"
"You're overthinking." Shiro chuckled more.
"Hey! You didn't deny it!" Artia said as Yogiri giggled from it.
It was a cold and beautiful night, but the smiles they had were warm.