The following day, I woke up before the sun was fully up, just as light started to shine through my apartment curtains. I felt a heavy weight of anxiety about the day ahead; I had to go to prison, a thought that made my stomach churn. As I quietly got out of bed, I looked at Jungkook, sleeping peacefully, his dark hair a bit messy. A wave of affection hit me, and I hesitated, not wanting to wake him.
Leaving him a note seemed like the right choice. I carefully put it on his pillow, writing a few lines to explain why I'd be gone, hoping it would soothe any worries he'd feel when he woke up alone. I didn't want him to panic or feel empty beside him; I wanted him to know I was thinking of him.
As I quietly approached the door, I couldn't help but think about all the emotions swirling inside me. The day before was still fresh—a mix of confusion and undeniable attraction. Jungkook's kiss lingered in my thoughts, a sweet memory that wouldn't disappear. I remembered how his lips pressed against mine and his strong arms wrapped around me, igniting something deep within me. It was a soft moment that felt different from the wild, impulsive kisses I was used to with crazy Jungkook. This one felt fragile yet powerful, and I wanted to experience that sweetness again.
But that kiss also left me feeling confused. It had happened so quickly, without any words or explanations. It felt like a piece of a puzzle that didn't quite fit into our relationship. I tried to push those thoughts away, wishing I could forget them. We hadn't talked about it at all, leaving me uncertain. Was it just a mistake? Had he kissed me out of vulnerability, looking for comfort? I felt lost, unsure how to react, scared of overstepping boundaries or pushing him away. I didn't want to hurt him; I wanted to protect his feelings, even if my own were tangled in confusion.
Taking a deep breath, I prepared myself as I walked into Mingyu's space. The atmosphere felt tense, and my heart started to race a little. Mingyu was sitting on the sofa, looking relaxed but with an intensity in his eyes that made me nervous. Inside, I was shaking; Mingyu wasn't someone to take lightly. I knew he was perceptive, and trying to fool him scared me, but I decided to try.
The air felt charged as soon as I closed the door behind me. Mingyu's eyes locked onto mine, sharp and probing and his words sent a chill down my spine, making me freeze in place. "Jungkook came to you, didn't he?"
I felt my heart drop. This was not good.
"No. Why would he come?" I forced a smile tinged with disappointment as I gazed at him. Inside, I was wrestling with the hurt that Jungkook's actions had thrust upon me before he vanished into thin air.
Mingyu, sensing my turmoil, rose to his feet and retrieved a familiar box, placing it gently into my trembling hands. My heart raced as I recognized it, confusion swirling in my mind like a storm. What could this possibly mean?
"Jungkook will need those," he said, his voice low and serious. "He'll face panic attacks every day. It's a common reaction for him. Just… If anything goes wrong, please call me. I'll be there in a heartbeat. No one knows where Jungkook is hiding, but you're not a suspect since he attacked you. Just keep him safe—locked away in your apartment, where I suspect he is right now." Mingyu's expression darkened, his lips pressed together, highlighting the conflict within him. His eyes roamed my face as if searching for reassurance.
"Why are you doing this?" I inquired, trying to piece together his motives. It felt pointless to mask the truth or pretend Jungkook wasn't in my apartment, yet Mingyu's commitment to this cause baffled me. Why extend such kindness to someone imprisoned by his own choices?
"I... I want to see him safe... somewhere he won't be hunted. Out there, people don't care at all. That's all I ask." Mingyu's voice dropped to a whisper as he reached out, his hand brushing gently through my hair in a comforting gesture. "I'm so sorry. If you get caught..."
"I know," I interrupted, my determination unwavering. "I fully understand the risks involved. But I won't regret my choice. This is something I want to do. If I don't at least try to help him, I'll live with that regret forever. I want him to be safe, away from this chaos, and to have a chance at a normal life."
"But first, you need to enlighten me on some things."
"If it's within my power, I will," he replied earnestly. "Tell me what you need to know."
"Tell me about his parents."
Mingyu's eyes held a deep sadness that I couldn't quite understand. It was as if he had drifted away from the moment, lost in thoughts. The warmth and connection we usually shared felt distant, as he seemed grappling with something heavy in his mind.
After a long pause, he finally spoke, his voice barely a whisper. "His father... was a... pedophile. It seems." The weight of his words hung in the air.
"Yes... I know," I whispered, the words barely audible, as I twisted my nose in disgust at the thought.
"And they weren't his real parents," he continued, his voice heavy with emotion. "He was adopted when he was just four years old. His biological parents... they left him in an orphanage without a second thought."
I felt my heart drop, and I instinctively averted my gaze, desperate to mask the shock that flickered across my face and the tears that threatened to spill from my eyes. Damn it. Damn it. Damn it. The harsh reality was almost too much to bear.
"Since when did his father start to... to..." I struggled to voice the question, the lump in my throat making speaking difficult. I swallowed hard, trying to steady my voice, but the weight of the revelation hung heavy between us, lingering in the air like an unwelcome ghost.
"Well... Y/N. Jungkook was adopted when he was 4 years old, so... We came to the conclusion that it happened right after he was brought into that house. "
My eyes remained glued to the floor, heavy with unspoken thoughts. "What is it about Jungkook that makes him behave this way?" I pondered. It was clear to me that, deep within his heart, he grappled with the haunting memories of his past, aware that what his father did to him was undeniably wrong. This internal conflict manifested in his tendency to push people away shrouded in fear and an unwillingness to trust anyone.
Yet, paradoxically, his other part enjoys sex and with anyone. "Will he become the same? As that man?"
"While growing up, our fathers, whether good or ill, are our earliest and strongest examples.
This makes me think that Jungkook, deep inside him, maybe knows that what his father did wasn't quite right. But at the same time, it may seem normal to him.
Because his father abused him repeatedly, maybe a part of him has come to think that those kinds of things are normal and everyone is doing it. After all, from what I could tell, Jungkook sees a distraction in sex or a way of losing time. Maybe he can't stay without it, either. Gender doesn't matter at all, it seems. And I am scared to think that perhaps he would do it with children, too."
"Studies indicate that about one-third of people who are abused in childhood will become abusers themselves.
The studies are also uncovering specific factors that help many victims grow into well-adjusted adulthood and factors that push others towards perpetuating the pattern of violence."
"He has a chance to become normal?" I interrupted Mingyu. I felt how I started to become restless. What if Jungkook was lost forever in that dark place he was living in day by day?
"Key factors found to worsen the long-term impact of abuse are abuse that started early, abuse that lasted for a long time, abuse in which the perpetrator has a close relationship with the victim, abuse that the child perceived as particularly harmful, and abuse that occurred within a cold emotional atmosphere in the family.
Victims of abuse frequently respond to the trauma by denying that any abuse occurred or by blaming themselves for the abuse, which they often view as justified discipline from adults.
In Jungkook's case, things do not seem very good. Despite that, he killed three people. This makes things worse. He was drugged as well for many years. I don't know what to say, Y/N."
"Many victims can overcome the trauma with the emotional support of someone close to their heart. Therapy wasn't very effective as he didn't want to cooperate. Through therapy, we can make him aware that he wasn't to blame for the abuse inflicted by his parents, also and my colleagues wanted to make Jungkook realize what happened to him and accept it. This by becoming one with his other self."
"But what if things will become worse?"
"Then, at least we have tried."
"One more thing, doctor Mingyu." I lifted my head and stared at him. "Who gives Jungkook chocolate? "
At that, Mingyu's eyes widened in shock.
"What? "
" The first moment Jungkook had spoken to me. He just had a nightmare, and he begged me to make him stop.
"Something is telling me that Jungkook was abused in prison... by a man."
***
Pedophilia is considered a paraphernalia, a condition in which a person's sexual arousal and gratification depend on fantasizing about and engaging in sexual behavior that is atypical and extreme.
Pedophilia is defined as the fantasy or act of sexual activity with children who are generally age 13 year's or younger.
Pedophiles are usually men and can be attracted to either or both sexes.
The prevalence of pedophilic disorder is unknown, but the highest possible prevalence in the male population is approximately three to five percent. The prevalence in the female population is thought to be a small fraction of the prevalence in males.
Offenders are usually family friends or relatives. Types of activities vary and may include just looking at a child or undressing and touching a child. However, acts often do involve oral sex or touching of genitals of the child or offender.
Studies suggest that children who feel uncared for or lonely may be at higher risk for sexual abuse.