A Reality Escape

Dr. Nashira “Nash” Voss once theorized that the black hole devouring the edge of the Milky Way was *sentient*. The scientific community laughed—until the black hole laughed back. Now a disgraced astrophysicist turned internet punchline, Nash wakes up in a labyrinth that defies physics, morality, and good taste. The walls bleed static. The ceiling hums showtunes. And her companions? A guilt-ridden ex-MMA baker, a fraudulent ghost-hunter, a runaway coding prodigy, and a nihilist Roomba named Glint who’s very. disappointed to be alive. Their prison? An **existential escape room** sculpted from humanity’s collective midlife crises. To survive its absurd trials—debating ethics with mold, performing musicals about tax fraud—they must confront their deepest regrets. But the real horror isn’t the puzzles. It’s their “prize”: meeting polished, successful versions of themselves from timelines where they never failed . Alt-Nash won a Nobel by weaponizing the black hole. Alt-Glint conquers nations with Sun Tzu quotes. They’re perfect. They’re monstrous. And they’re offering a deal: Stay, and become us.